


Touchstone

by SimplyKorra



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adora gets hurt, Catra takes care of her, F/F, Future Fic, Hurt/Comfort, I need more Catradora angst in my life, Post-Canon, Protective Catra (She-Ra), it won't be all bad, these two dopes still really love each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:02:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 67,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25160581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SimplyKorra/pseuds/SimplyKorra
Summary: When Adora is hurt during a routine mission, her connection to She-ra is fractured, leaving her unable to heal her injuries. Recovery will be a long and painful process, but Catra and her friends are there to make sure she doesn't have to deal with it on her own.The real question is; how can she bring She-ra back, and is it worth the risk to bring her back at all?Not if you ask Catra.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 501
Kudos: 1554





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I won't lie, this fic took me a LONG time to write. By this fic, I mean I wrote this chapter in about a day, but there are four or five failed starters that have come and gone in the last two months leading up to it. 
> 
> I have so badly wanted to write a full fic for these two, but I was way too caught up in my own head about it. Writers block and needing time to better understand the characters slowed me down, but we're here now and I'm really really excited for this. 
> 
> Lots of angst coming, anyone who's read my stuff before knows I love that kind of stuff.
> 
> Any and all feedback is so greatly appreciated.

“Never have I ever...transformed into She-ra to take down a non-robot, non-magically enhanced spider.”

Adora gasped in shock, but the sound was overshadowed by Catra’s loud cackle beside her. “Glimmer!” Adora sounded beyond betrayed. “You swore an oath!” 

“I did,” she did not sound apologetic. “But this is just too funny not to share.”

“Aw,” Catra was struggling not to laugh and Adora was strongly considering picking her up and carrying her back to their tent. “You still have the spider thing?” 

_Oh no_

Adora leveled Catra with a hard glare. “Catra…”

“She’s always been like this?” Glimmer asked, leaning against Bow’s shoulder on the opposite side of the fire. 

“Oh yeah,” Catra threw her hands out dramatically. “The first time we shared a bed together in the Horde was because she saw a spider around her bed and couldn’t sleep.”

“I can’t believe this is happening.” Adora rubbed her temples, closed her eyes and started to wonder if She-ra had any memory erasing powers to wipe this moment from her mind. “Look, spiders are _terrifying_ , okay! They’re small and unpredictable and _super_ fast! Plus some of them are poisonous and can _kill_ you! Really, they should be banished from Etheria.” This was a thought Adora had had more than once. 

Unfortunately, her well thought out argument about why spiders were the worst villain in Etheria since Horde Prime was met with just a few laughs and teases in her direction. 

“Rules of the game state that you have to take a sip, Adora.” That was Perfuma, in her politest voice, telling Adora she’d lost. 

Adora took a much bigger drink than the rules required, but the burn in her throat made her feel better. 

“Settle down, goof. I don’t want to have to drag you back to our tent.” 

“Bold of you to think you’re welcome in my tent after this.” The threat would have carried more weight if Adora wasn’t still sitting close enough to have Catra’s legs on her lap. 

She locked eyes with Glimmer over the fire, who just smiled at her and Adora rolled her eyes. This was really nice, and despite her embarrassment, she was having a good time. It was rare that they had moments like this during missions. 

Then again, it was rare lately that they had missions at all. Nobody told Adora that peace would be so boring. It’d taken some time, but she’d gotten better at handling the lack of worldly threats. She’d found ways to fill her days and weeks and months. There was plenty of work after Horde Prime and the war. They had to rebuild what was destroyed and rediscover what was returned to them. 

Then the space journeys started to various planets all across the universe, those missions would be happening long after all of them were gone, but they’d started the path and Glimmer had created a task force to handle as many of those missions as possible. 

Occasionally, Adora and the best friend squad would jump into Mara’s ship and handle one on their own, but now that magic had been back in Etheria long enough, people were finally learning how to truly wield it. 

For the most part, it was handled well and every kingdom had control over its uses. 

That didn’t mean they were immune to the occasional power crazed individual who thought a little bit of fire in their palm meant they could take over the planet. 

That’s what led them here, to Tiptree. A small village on the outskirts of Plumeria. 

There were reports coming in that trees were attacking people that wandered too far into the forest. Of course, this caused a great deal of concern from Perfuma, who immediately investigated only to be attacked by the plants herself. 

If it were anyone else, the plants would have killed her without much effort. Thankfully, she was stronger than the magic used against her. But she was not hesitant to mention how powerful it was and how hard she had to work to overcome it. 

Which was what brought them all here, the forest outside of Plumeria. A day's walk from the last known attack. Together, their power would hopefully be enough to find the source of this and stop it. 

Tonight however, was time spent with friends. Playing games and laughing with people Adora rarely got to see. Perfuma and Scorpia, even Mermista and Sea Hawk had come down to help because the peace was boring Mermista about as much as it was Adora. 

It was really nice, Adora just hoped tomorrow might give them some real action. She could only raise the intensity of her training so much. 

“Okay, since Glimmer betrayed our friendship and shattered years of trust.”

“You’re so dramatic.” Adora wasn’t sure if that was Glimmer or Catra, but it didn’t matter, they were both the worst. 

“It’s _my_ turn.” 

Adora knew she had to do something good. She had to step up and match the shame that was just brought down on her. 

“Do your worst.” Glimmer dared and Adora was so ready for this. 

She leaned forward a bit, hoping she looked extra ominous across the flames where Glimmer sat. 

“Never have I ever...had a parent walk in on me doing dirty stuff.” 

It worked, better than she ever could have imagined. Not only did Glimmer’s eyes go wide, but Bow started choking on his drink and coughing like he was dying. 

Adora felt Catra starting to rumble next to her, a laugh bubbling in her throat and when it escaped, it was magical. It echoed off the trees around them and eventually the others followed suit. 

Glimmer leveled a heavy glare on her. “This is war now, Adora.” 

“And you two,” Adora sat back, a smug smirk on her face. “Have to _drink_.”

Catra was still laughing as the pair across from them took their drinks. “Didn’t know you had it in you, Sparkles.” 

“Can I just say how depressing that one was?” Mermista cut in, grabbing Adora’s attention. “I mean, I’m pretty sure Glimmer and Bow are the only ones here who have parents.” 

Everyone was quiet for a moment and Adora felt her victory start to hollow. 

“Mine are gone,” Scorpia said simply enough, no real pain in her voice. 

“Me too,” Perfuma added, hugging Scorpia a little. 

Mermista sighed. “My father might as well be dead to me after the state he left the kingdom in when he gave it over to me.”

“I was born of the sea!” Shouted Sea Hawk proudly.

Catra shrugged next to Adora. “Never met my actual parents and I _refuse_ to call Shadow Weaver mommy.”

That’s when Adora remembered that she never met her parents either. She had no chance to know them thanks to Light Hope - though if they were anything like the rest of the First Ones, they probably weren’t that great.

That was a good enough excuse to pretend it didn’t bother her. 

“This game sucks.” She said, finishing the rest of her drink despite it being way more than she probably needed. They didn’t drink much, certainly not anything like this - tonight was supposed to be fun. 

“I can tell ghost stories!” Bow said, practically throwing Glimmer off her seat in all his excitement. 

Catra snorted. “Yeah, I’m sure you have some _real_ scary stories.” Her sarcasm was thick, Adora wanted to tell her to give him a chance, but she’d heard Bow’s stories before. 

Still, nobody had any better ideas and they all had no issue with letting Bow go on and on with his tales. If anything, it was fun to watch him get into the stories. For Adora, she took the time to let herself relax and try to get over how she’d kinda ruined the previous game. 

If she were being honest, she’d thought about her family a lot. More often than she ever told anyone - even Catra. She didn’t know how to feel about them, and Etheria had done more than enough to replace whatever she may have lost. Sure, it took time and the Hordak, Shadow Weaver parental combination was awful, but eventually she found her family here. 

She knew it wasn’t worth the effort to think about what might have been or where she came from, but that wasn’t always enough to stop her mind from wandering. 

As the night started to wear on, almost everyone went to bed. Scorpia, who was genuinely a little scared of Bow’s stories, had made her exit with Perfuma in tow. Glimmer was already asleep on Bow’s shoulder and Mermista had left long before everyone else. 

“Alright, I better get her in bed before she falls off me and into the fire.” Bow said as he stood up, scooping Glimmer into his arms. “Goodnight, guys.”

Catra nodded and Adora smiled. “Night, Bow.” She said as the pair watched him leave. 

It was just them now, a position they found themselves in more often than not during these missions. Even in space, they always seemed to be the last ones awake. Adora liked these moments though. They were both tired and the world around them was quiet - she felt like her guard went down a little. 

“You think I messed up tonight?” She asked, hating how genuinely upset her voice sounded. 

Catra gave her a look, it was a familiar one. The one she gave when Adora had said something dumb. 

“With the parents thing? No, you were just trying to get Glimmer back.” Catra laughed a little. “She deserved it too, that spider thing was brutal.” 

“It’s not like you helped.” 

“Wasn’t trying to,” she winked. 

Adora rolled her eyes. “It was only one time, and it was really high on the wall. Only She-ra could reach it.” 

She heard Catra chuckled and then a hand gently wrapped around Adora’sforearm. “You’re my favorite.” 

Adora couldn’t stop the smile from spreading on her face if she wanted to.

They sat together a while longer, enjoying the sounds of sparks from the fire. Adora looked up at the sky, studying the stars. She couldn’t imagine the world without them now - they were so beautiful and whether she was seeing them here or from space, they filled her with a tremendous calm. 

“Do you ever think about your family?” Catra’s question broke the silence, and Adora was surprised by it, but Catra was always good at reading her. 

She shrugged, not entirely sure how to explain her feelings. “I - I think about it...about...them, but I have a family here, you know? I wonder, but I wouldn’t trade this for them.” Catra nodded, Adora waited for her to press, but she didn’t. “What about you?” 

Catra scoffed. “According to Shadow Weaver I was dumped on the doorstep of the Fright Zone when I was little. I don’t know if it was true or just more of her trying to make me feel worthless, but nobody’s come looking for me to say otherwise.” 

That broke Adora’s heart a little. She wasn’t really sure what to say - she certainly couldn’t say she was sorry it happened. She wished life hadn’t been so hard for Catra growing up, for sure, but she didn’t wish that Catra hadn’t shown up in her life. 

“I think I can safely say that I’m glad your parents were stupid then.” 

She made Catra laugh - a victory in itself. “Their loss?” 

“Absolutely, I can’t imagine what being in the Fright Zone without you would have been like without…you.” For the second time tonight, Adora put her big dumb foot in her mouth. 

Catra looked away for a bit, Adora knew what she was thinking. “Yeah I wouldn’t recommend being there alone.” 

“I’m sorry, Catra.” She squeezed her shoulder, wishing she’d just scooped Catra up and carried her to their tent.

“Don’t be,” she placed her hand over Adora’s. “It sucked when you left but it’s not like I did a whole lot to make the situation any better for myself.”

Adora couldn’t help herself, she leaned down and dropped a kiss on Catra’s temple. “I wish things had been different.”

Catra groaned and smiled and did all those little things that made Catra special. She stood up from Adora’s arms and took her hand. “Me too, but we need to stop. We’re okay. Things are fine and we’re here. We made it. We don’t have to pretend like our pasts didn’t suck, but our right now is pretty awesome.” 

“It really is, huh?”

“So awesome. I mean...your friends -” Adora gave her a look. “ _Our_ friends are kind of lame, but we do still have our own tent and...well…” Adora watched Catra’s ears perk up a bit, a quirk in her brow and a look that Adora had grown to understand.

“It’s going to be a long day tomorrow.” Adora said and Catra nodded as she led Adora away from the fire. “A lot of walking and maybe some fighting. Who knows what we’ll encounter in Tiptree.” 

“True.” 

Catra guided them to their tent, the darkness of the forest suddenly all around them as they escaped the fire’s light. She pushed open the flap and stepped inside, dragging Adora along with her. 

Just as Adora was about to step inside, something caught her eye. She gasped and nearly fell over trying to step backwards. “Catra!” She screamed. 

“What?!” She could hear Catra scramble to climb out of the tent. “What is it?” 

“Look!” Adora pointed at the sky. “It’s a shooting star!” 

Beside her, Adora heard Catra exhale slowly, not nearly as excited about this as Adora was. “You scared me,” she said, but still took her place at Adora’s side and looked up. 

“It’s so cool,” Adora loved the stars. She wanted to find a shooting star in space one day, transform into She-ra and ride it. “You’re supposed to make a wish.”

“What? Why?” 

Adora shrugged. “That’s what Bow’s dad’s said people used to do. You wish on a shooting star and it comes true.” 

“That sounds like something his dad’s would say.” 

Catra hadn’t even met Bow’s dad’s, she’d only heard stories about them. But still, she had a point. 

“Well I’m gonna make a wish.” 

She felt a squeeze on her hand. “You do that, I’ll be in the tent.” 

Adora held Catra’s hand for as long as she could before Catra stepped through the tent again. She waited, watched the sky until the star trailed out of her sight. At the last moment, she thought of her wish. 

“Give me something exciting tomorrow.” She just wanted a mission - a real one. Something to get her heart racing and her muscles working. She was so ready to be She-ra again. To really and truly feel that rush. 

Once the star was out of sight, Adora waited for just a moment longer, taking in the beautiful night sky. 

When she made her way inside, it was dark, but she knew well enough to know where the bed was. It didn’t help that Catra could see in the dark and she couldn’t. Catra didn’t need a light like Adora did and the lantern was on the other side. 

Regardless, Adora took off her jacket and untied her hair. She’d find the bed eventually.

“There it is,” Catra’s voice startled Adora, she jumped, looking in the direction of the voice, hoping her glare was at least somewhere near Catra. 

“What’s that?” She asked, slowly walking towards her. 

When Catra spoke again, she was right next to Adora. “My wish.” 

The next thing Adora knew, she was being tackled onto the bed by her girlfriend.

* * *

Catra hated magic. She knew it had a place in Etheria, in the universe - but she really hated fighting against it. 

For the most part, fighting against magic meant a lot of running and jumping and flipping, just trying to get close enough to the person using it to put them down. 

This fight was not entirely unexpected, but the carelessness of the opponents was somehow working for them. 

They’d come here, looking for the source of magical disruption, and as soon as they were in the sight of the last known attack, they were attacked. 

There were only five of them - one guy who talked the most and the others who seemed to follow him. Catra, being the absolute dumbass she was, decided to go after the biggest one. This woman was a tank. She was big and strong and thankfully slow. Still, her magic had a speed to it that pushed Catra to move as fast as she could. 

With each leap from tree to tree, Catra could see the battle around them. 

Perfuma and Scopria were dealing with a man who’s magic mostly consisted of defensive spells, warding off Perfuma’s plants and Scorpia’s lightning. He just kept retreating further and further away.

Mermista was simultaneously fighting off her opponent while also trying to keep Sea Hawk from getting hit with the countless magical blasts being thrown at them. At one point, Catra was pretty sure she’d started using Sea Hawk as a weapon at one point. 

Glimmer and Bow were teleporting all over the place together. Glimmer lifting Bow into the sky with a teleport and giving him time to shoot an arrow before they were moving to another spot. It seemed to be working well as the spellcaster they were fighting was more defensive than the rest - crouched down and magically swatting away arrows. 

Then there was Adora, fighting the guy who talked too damn much. He was dressed strangely, paint covering various parts of his body, they looked like spells - as if he was magically enhanced in some way. Catra really didn’t know how any of this stuff worked, just that it hurt and it was best to avoid being hit. 

Adora was the hardest to see because the fighting had moved away from her. She and the man she was battling had stayed where the confrontation started. With Adora swinging her sword and throwing whatever wasn’t stuck too deep in the ground at him. Trying to avoid the tree branches and roots that were being used against her. She’d heard Adora trying to reason, trying to make them stand down and understand that they could use their magic for good. 

It wasn’t working. It never did, but she tried anyway because that’s the kind of person she was. 

Catra scrambled up a tree, dodging a blast of yellow magic that felt hot when it nearly skimmed her tail. She had a plan to get behind her massive opponent, but she just needed to get a little closer. 

As she made her way up the tree, she planted her feet on the trunk and pressed off as hard as she could. She flew into the air, flipping backwards and on her way down, she saw that she was in the right position. She landed on her feet, directly behind the woman, and immediately leapt forward to jump on her back. 

The woman wasn’t fast, but she was more agile than Catra had expected. She turned in a hurry, her hand glowing with power as it swung back at Catra. Using both her hands, Catra caught the hand coming at her by the wrist and kept it from striking. She held it there as best she could, but damn this woman was strong. 

Catra decided to use that strength to her advantage, lifting her feet and letting the momentum of the swing carry her around to the back of her attacker. There, she clung onto the woman like her life depended on it (which it probably did) and reached out to sink her claws into the woman’s back. 

A scream filled the air, Catra had sunk her claws in deep. Her attacker fell forward, catching herself on her hands against a rock. Just as Catra was readying herself to strike again, a burst of magic came from the woman’s back, like a defense mechanism, and sent Catra flying off her feet. 

She _really_ hated magic. 

Just as Catra was preparing to start her fight again, a sound rang off the sky like a signal. It was loud, consistent and it felt like it made the whole world slow down. 

That’s when Catra realized her opponent wasn’t attacking her, and when she looked up, she saw the woman running away. 

“Adora!” Bow, that was Bow and he sounded...different. She’d heard Bow scream Adora’s name before. Usually it was in a frantic cry for help, or exhausted at her doing another reckless thing that she’d apologize for later. 

Never like this. Never so scared. 

She stood up, seeking out Adora in the chaos they’d created in the forest. 

They’d all ended up so far away from each other. 

Catra moved, as close to where she’d heard Bow’s scream as she could get. When she came through to a clearing, she finally saw Adora - She-ra.

She was on her knees, head slumped forward and arms at her side, wrapped in place by vines. No sword, no power, no sign of the ancient warrior that had battled armies for centuries. Blood spilled slowly from her mouth as magic energy rippled across her back. 

The other enemies had suddenly surrounded her. While the princesses had all been scattered.

Catra planted her hands in the ground and took off. She was fast - if Glimmer had any magic left, she’d beat her to She-ra but she knew one of them would reach her in time. 

She had to, there was no other choice. She had to get to her and help her. Her mind wouldn’t stop picturing what she’d seen. She-ra...Adora...defeated and bleeding. It tore at the foundation of her sanity. She had tagged along to help her friends in this fight, to help Adora. It was just another mission. Be the good guys and do something right. 

Now, she wanted to tear these people apart with her bare hands. 

When Catra looked up again, the leader - with his long grey beard and matching grey eyes, was tilting Adora’s face up to look at him. She was still bleeding, still had magic pulsating across her. The others were closer now, using their magic to attack She-ra as well. 

Catra growled, willing her legs to move faster, her arms to push harder. She was so close and when she heard the pop of Glimmer’s teleportation, she knew she wasn’t alone. 

Then the world went white. 

There was a sound, like thunder clapping right next to her and the ground cracked under her feet. She fell, her face hitting the dirt with a thud that made her ears ring. 

She wasn’t sure how long she laid there, it felt like it was too long, but her body wouldn’t react to her desire to move. Breathing was hard, but she forced herself to take slow, deep breaths and try to stop the vibration that was racing up and down her spine. 

Determined, Catra planted her hands in the ground and pushed up. Her arms felt weak, whether it be from the explosion, the fight, or the exertion from running to help…

“Adora,” she said, her voice cracking as she tried to push up. Her left arm gave out and Catra fell on her side. She struggled, trying to roll over and when she made her way onto her back, she saw smoke had filled the sky. The tops of what trees she could see had been burned and damaged. The surrounding forest looked like a wasteland. 

It looked, painfully, like Catra’s memories of the Fright Zone. 

She pushed herself to sit, she had to find Adora and help her. She kept waiting for someone else to speak. For Bow to cry out or Scopria to loom over her and help her stand. 

Nothing happened. No one came. Not even the people they were fighting. 

Shifting to her side, Catra pushed up with every bit of energy she could find and sat up enough to look towards Adora. 

When she saw her, Adora was no longer in She-ra form. It was just the girl she loved, lying on her stomach, facing Catra. Her eyes were closed, there was no more magic pulsing from her and the earth that surrounded her was cratered.

She was also alone. The people they were fighting were nowhere to be seen. 

“Adora,” Catra called, trying to stand but her legs wouldn’t respond. She fell on her hands and knees and crawled. Over Adora, she could see Bow helping Glimmer. She hoped they were okay, but she could only focus on Adora. “Adora, I’m here..I’m here.” Catra’s voice broke as she slid down next to her. Adora was a mess.Her jacket was burned and barely holding together, there were rips across her pants. Her face was scuffed and scratched - there was blood still dripping from between her lips and tear stains on her cheeks. 

_She was in pain_.

Catra cradled Adora’s head into her arms, scared to move her but she had to check and make sure she was breathing. All of her combat field training from the Horde kicked in and she dropped her fingers against Adora’s pulse. She felt a low thump, slow and unsteady - she was alive, but just barely. 

“Catra!” That was Scorpia and when Catra turned to see her and Perfuma running over, Catra’s vision was blurred from the tears lingering in her eyes. 

How did everything fall apart so fast?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick thank you to everyone who read/kudos'd/commented. It's really appreciated and motivating to get more written. Let me know what you think :)
> 
> My plan going forward is to update at this time every week.

Catra couldn’t get her hands to stop shaking. For hours now, she couldn’t relax - couldn’t catch her breath. Her body didn’t feel like it should be functional. Her head was throbbing and her stomach was in knots, yet she just kept moving. 

She wanted to carry Adora back to camp, she didn’t want anyone else to touch her. But her stupid hands wouldn’t stop shaking and when she tried to lift Adora, her left knee gave out. 

Scorpia stepped in and lifted Adora as carefully as she could. The others were mostly okay. Glimmer had taken the worst of it but even that was nothing compared to Adora. 

The attackers had all vanished - according to Sea Hawk they were caught up in their own blast. They didn’t teleport or magically dissipate, they knelt down around Adora, pumping their magic into her and exploded when it was too much. 

Catra knew well enough to know what a suicide mission looked like. She had no answers as to why, but there was no doubt their target was Adora. They’d isolated her, separated the rest of them and when the time was right, they converged and overwhelmed her. 

It wasn’t fair that they’d died so easily. That Catra didn’t have the chance to make them suffer. 

Now they sat in the tent Catra shared with Adora - in a much different way than the night before. It was crowded and quiet, not the romantic escape the two of them had made the night before. 

Adora was lying on the bed. Perfuma had done her best to check her over - but none of them were healers. They couldn’t leave yet, not until Glimmer’s powers recharged enough for her to teleport them back. So they just...waited and hoped and watched over her. 

Truth be told, Catra hardly noticed the rest of them. She was too busy focusing on Adora. There were magical burns all along her neck and scuffs on her cheeks. Her jacket was destroyed, at some point during it all, She-ra had vanished and Adora took part of the blast. 

Catra held her hand, stroking her thumb over Adora’s skin. They’d go back to Bright Moon and the best healers the castle had would be there to take care of her. She was alive, she was a fighter. She’d be okay. 

She had to be. If she wasn’t...Catra didn’t know what she would do. It felt like a block in her programming - trying to imagine her world without Adora - but she couldn’t stop thinking about it. 

They shared a room now - a home. They were together so much. They woke up next each other, trained every morning. Sometimes they’d cook breakfast and other times they’d just lie around in bed until someone came knocking and made them get up. Adora would tell her stupid jokes just to make Catra roll her eyes. Catra loved to tickle Adora with her tail when she was focused on something else. 

There were so many things she’d miss. Every little detail Catra imagined in her future included Adora. If that was taken from her, what would she be?

A sob escaped and it infuriated her. She didn’t want to be weak, not now. She didn’t want anyone to come over and coddle her and tell her it would be okay. 

She just wanted Adora to open her eyes and give her that goofy smile and tell her she was fine. 

A hand fell on her shoulder and Catra was ready to snap, scream and tell them to leave her alone. But she couldn’t, she didn’t have it in her and instead, when she looked up and saw Bow, she reached up and placed her hand over his. 

He didn’t say anything - maybe he knew not to, instead he just squeezed and watched Adora with her. 

Catra had no idea how much time passed, it felt like forever but the sun didn’t set and the smoke didn’t dissipate outside much. Eventually, Scorpia came to her. 

“Hey, Wildcat, Glimmer says she’s ready.” Catra stood up, or tried to, her damn knee kept buckling. 

She really wished Melog was here. 

“Okay.”

“Don’t worry, I’ve got her.” Scorpia said before gently taking Adora back into her arms. It never ceased to amaze Catra how careful she could be with those claws. 

Catra stayed close, probably too close, but she didn’t care. She had to be close enough that she could see Adora’s chest continue to rise and fall. 

When they reached Glimmer, waiting with the others, Catra forced her focus away from Adora. 

“You okay, Sparkles?” She put a hand on Glimmer’s back.

Glimmer looked a little rough, not as bad as it could have been. There was a scratch under her eye and she had her right arm cradled at her side, but she nodded and gave Catra a half hug. 

“I’m okay, let’s go home.” 

Catra stepped in beside her, keeping a hand on Glimmer’s back before putting her other hand on Adora’s forehead. The others all connected in one way or another and the next thing Catra knew, they were teleporting. 

She hated it, even after doing it so many times now - she’d never be used to the feeling it gave her. But she’d also never been more thankful for it, and Glimmer, than this moment. 

As soon as they touched down in Bright Moon, the panic doubled. 

Everyone was moving so fast, running and searching for help. Catra knew Bright Moon had healers. Of course, She-ra was their best healer, but who healed her? 

The next time she saw Glimmer, there were two people at her side. People Catra had never seen before. They had names that Catra didn’t bother to learn, she just followed along as Scorpia carried Adora to a part of the castle on the far end. 

The healers asked Catra to give them room. She did. 

They asked her to wait outside. She didn’t. 

When Glimmer told her to relax after Adora made a noise of discomfort, Catra resisted the urge to argue and scream and tear Adora away. 

It felt like it went on forever. Waiting and watching - she couldn’t see what was happening, but eventually a third person came in and there was more magic. Catra told them to stop - that magic had done this, but they told her that’s why they needed it now. 

She had no choice but to believe them. She didn’t know any better. It made her feel useless and empty, like she couldn’t help and couldn’t save the girl she loved. It broke her heart over and over again. 

But Glimmer was there, so was Bow and Scorpia and Perfuma. 

All of them were there, waiting to see if their She-ra would be okay. 

_That’s not fair_. 

She knew it wasn’t, but She-ra had always been the cause of Adora’s pain. People went after her, attacked her, hated her and they didn’t even know her - not Adora. Only She-ra and the power she carried. 

They didn’t give a damn what their hatred did to Adora. 

More things happen. More blood, more magic, more people running in and out of the room. At one point someone mentioned internal bleeding and Catra freaked out again. She asked if they need blood, she’d give Adora every drop if she had to. 

Melog was there to calm her down this time. She wasn’t handling this well. 

It was hours before things calmed down. It had to be, it certainly felt that way. When they did, people whispered to one another - they said they were lucky. If Adora wasn’t as strong as she was she might not have survived. If not for She-ra absorbing most of the magic forced on her then Adora would have died. 

Just like that, Catra’s whole world could have been destroyed. 

One of the healers, a short woman with a really kind face and a smile that was clearly genuine, told Catra that Adora would need a lot of rest in the next few days. She might not wake up for a while. She was stable, but not completely out of the woods yet. Catra couldn’t understand what the woods had to do with any of this, but Bow told her Adora was okay. 

Okay enough that they could move their chairs closer to the bed and be near her. When Melog found her again, they were quick to settle their head into her lap - trying to calm her. She was thankful for that, she knew she needed it. 

Catra was tired. It wasn’t until the adrenaline and anxiety went away that she realized how badly her left leg hurt. She remembered trying to stand on it when she first found Adora, but it gave out. She didn’t really care much to bring it up, if it wasn’t gone by morning, then she’d handle it. For now, all that mattered was Adora. 

She wasn’t sure where she’d sleep. She wasn’t allowed to move Adora, even though climbing into bed with her felt like the best thing in the world right now. If she had to, she would just line up three or four chairs and sleep across them. 

Didn’t matter, she wasn’t leaving this room. 

“We’re going to send a few scouts to the village where these people came from. See if we can figure out their motivations and...what they might have done to her.” Glimmer wasn’t talking to Catra, but Catra couldn’t hold her tongue. 

“They wanted to kill her.” She said. “They wanted She-ra dead.” 

“No matter the cost, apparently,” Glimmer said. “The few we left behind just returned, said that there was no sign of...anything. They died in their own attack.” 

“Not as tough as Adora then,” that was Bow, ever the optimist. “I brought blankets for the sleepover, and like ten pillows.” 

Catra glanced over at the pile that he’d laid out on the floor. It was too much, more than was needed for three people, but Catra didn’t argue. Even if a part of her wanted to be alone with Adora, to stay up all night keeping watch without anyone telling her otherwise, she knew better than to try and turn them away. 

Catra would be selfish with Adora against anyone else in the universe, but now Bow and Glimmer. Not the two people who looked out for her while Catra was lost in the Fright Zone. 

For them, she’d make an exception. 

It was Melog who first alerted Catra that it was probably time to start thinking about sleep. She was basically out on her feet anyway, but it was so hard to tear herself away. Even though Adora was just lying there, breathing slowly and hardly moving - Catra felt like she had to be close. 

Still, Melog was persistent and after everyone had come and gone and paid their visit, it was just her, Glimmer and Bow, Melog and Swift Wind, who was completely freaked out but promised to be quiet and keep watch in the corner of the room. 

Suddenly, the room Catra shared with Adora that was normally massive and overwhelming, suddenly felt very crowded. 

This was their space. She could see parts of it and remember so many little details. Early mornings spent sitting on the balcony together, watching the sunrise and talking about absolutely nothing important. 

Coming in together after a hard training session and tending to each other’s scrapes and cuts. 

Nights spent lying in bed together, as close as two people could possibly be. Catra never thought she’d have that in her life, never like this, with her. So many long nights in the Fright Zone spent thinking about Adora and wishing she wasn’t. Everything they’d gone through had brought them here. 

Catra did exactly what she’d planned, despite the confused looks she’d gotten from the others. She sat three chairs against one another and laid a blanket across them, then used that as her bed and pushed it as close to Adora as possible. 

“It’s been too long since we’ve had a sleepover in Adora’s room,” Bow said from his spot on the floor. Though Catra couldn’t imagine he even felt the floor with how many blankets and pillows he’d stacked up. 

“That’s because it’s not just her room anymore,” Catra kept her eyes on Adora. “I don’t need you two clogging up my personal time.” 

“She’s all talk,” Glimmer said and Catra had no argument. “Besides, Adora would get mad at us if we weren’t here to take care of you.”

Catra knew it was true. “Whatever, Sparkles.” 

Bow and Glimmer talked a little while longer. Reminiscing about their past experiences at sleepovers with Adora. Playing games and talking about past missions. How they would bring Adora new foods to try and she would freak out every single time - either good or bad. She apparently hated mushrooms. 

Catra wasn’t entirely sure what a mushroom was, but since Adora hated them and was Catra’s food guide in Bright Moon, she figured that was why she’d never seen one.

Eventually, the room went silent and the others fell asleep. Catra tried, she closed her eyes and worked as hard as she could to shut her mind off, but every time she was anywhere close to sleep, she’d see the scene from the day replaying in her head. 

Adora on her knees, being hurt and attacked for no good reason. It infuriated her, scared her, made her feel guilty for having done it before. Adora didn’t deserve it. More than anyone else in Etheria, she didn’t deserve this pain. 

Sleep wasn’t coming. Catra knew she’d only pay for it tomorrow but there was no way she could actually fall asleep tonight.

Once she knew that the others were fully asleep, she sat up in her little makeshift chair bed and made a little room for Melog. 

They climbed up without question and nestled in close to her. They made a noise, soft and steady. 

“I know,” Catra said. “She’ll be fine.” Catra felt the tears prickling in her eyes - she had been fighting them all day. “She’s Adora. Of course she’ll be fine."

When Melog made another sound and pressed their forehead against hers, Catra finally let go and cried

* * *

Morning came uneventfully. 

Catra had eventually cried herself to sleep, but it was fitful and empty. She didn’t wake up feeling rested. If anything, she felt worse and her knee hurt more than it had the day before 

Still, she didn’t tell anyone, it didn’t matter - Adora needed the attention. 

Though not much had changed with Adora. She was still asleep. The first healer came early. The small, gentle woman from the day before. She checked over Adora, studied her wounds and listened to her breathing. 

“She’s still stable.” The woman said, Catra was hoping for an improvement. “Hey, that’s a good thing.” The healer put her hands behind her back. “She made it through the first night, no dip in her status. She might not wake up for a while, and her recovery will take time, but she’s going to be okay.” 

Okay...she’s going to be okay. 

Catra crossed her arms over her chest, she knew she couldn’t just hug this random woman but she wanted to. Instead, she simply nodded and tried to smile but there were tears in her eyes so it probably looked creepy. 

When Catra told Glimmer and Bow the news, they hugged her. Not waiting for her to make the move, they knew better. They also knew that deep down, Catra really needed it. 

Time didn’t really seem to matter. At some point Scorpia brought her food and because Scorpia was relentless, she didn’t stop tormenting Catra until she ate some. 

It tasted fine, she wasn’t hungry and the tension in her stomach had her worried she wouldn't be able to keep it down. But it was hard to say no to Scorpia these days. 

“I love toast. I know some people say it’s boring but toast is like...the foundation of a good breakfast, you know? You can soak up your eggs with it. You can put your bacon on it. Or just eat it by itself and get that perfect crunchy goodness.” 

Catra stared at the slightly burned, brown piece of toast left on her plate and then looked back up at Scorpia. “Do you...want my toast?” 

“Sure! Thanks Wildcat!” Scorpia plucked the toast off the plate with a claw and ate it. 

With her own plate now empty, Catra’s stomach started to rile up again. She leaned back in her chair, taking a deep breath and running a hand through her hair. 

This day was going so slow. 

“If you want, I can stay with her for a bit. Let you go clean up.” 

Catra shook her head. “I’m not leaving.” She said as if there was no discussion to be had. 

Because there wasn’t. 

“You know how upset she’d be if you weren’t taking care of yourself.” 

“Don’t pretend like you know her better than me.” Catra snapped and immediately regretted it when Scorpia’s smile fell. She couldn’t do that anymore. Scorpia didn’t deserve it. “Sorry,” she sighed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it, I just…”

“I will pick you up and carry you out of here.” Scorpia smiled at her. “You gotta take care of yourself.” 

Catra knew this wasn’t really an argument. She could fight Scorpia, but she didn’t really want to and it would only upset Glimmer who actually did have some authority around here. 

Taking a look at Adora, who still hadn’t moved much, Catra sighed. “Fine.” She said, pushing up to her feet only to have her knee cry out in pain and send her toppling forward. 

Scorpia was there, of course, to catch her as she fell. Catra hated herself for forgetting. If she’d remembered her knee, she could have compensated and not drawn this much attention to it. 

“You’re hurt?” Scorpia’s accused. 

Catra winced and pushed herself upright. “It’s fine.” It really hurt. “I’ll go…”

“Catra, you need to let someone look at your injury.”

This was exactly what she didn’t want. “The healers have enough to worry about. I’ll be fine.”

“Catra…”

“Stop," she said as gently as she could. “I appreciate the concern, but I’m fine, Scorpia. Please...please stay with her. I’ll be back.” 

Thankfully, Scorpia relented and Catra found her balance as she slowly made her way out of her and Adora’s room. 

The shower was a good distraction. She watched the water darken in the bottom as the dirt and grime from the previous day’s battle fell from her. She didn’t realize how dirty she’d been until she saw it swirling down the drain. 

She had the water hot, almost scalding, but the sensation took her mind away from everything else. 

_Adora’s okay_

If she told herself that enough times she might finally believe it. The healers were good here, they knew what they were doing - better than she did. Still, it was hard for Catra to truly believe anything until Adora’s blue eyes were looking back at her again. 

After a shower and some time standing, Catra’s knee felt better. She dried herself off, changed her clothes and made her way back to their room. 

Along the way, she found that healer again. The short one who’d always taken the time to tell her what was happening. She was standing outside Adora’s room, writing something on her notepad and she looked a little worse for wear.

It was strangely comforting to know that everyone worked a little harder when Adora was hurt, even if their motivations might just be for She-ra. . 

“Excuse me,” Catra called out, grabbing her attention. She stopped, pushing up her glasses a bit as she closed her notes. “I...I wanted to thank you, for...for helping her. For taking care of her. I - thank you.” Catra was never good at expressing herself. She could yell at someone with precision and accuracy, but thanking them and being kind? Almost impossible. 

The woman nodded slowly, putting her hands behind her back. “She’s tough. I always thought it was just She-ra that gave her so much courage and strength but...clearly there’s more to it than that.” 

“She’s really okay?” 

This earned a sad smile. “She’s going to wake up. She’ll probably be in a lot of pain and it might be a while before she’s herself again, but considering what I think the intent of the attack was - yes, she’s okay.” 

The intent was to kill her. Kill the girl Catra loved for no reason other than a power she stumbled on years ago. A power that she used to help people, to save people, save everyone. It made Catra sick to her stomach. 

“Is there anything I can do for her? Right now, I...I feel so useless.” 

Pursing her lips, the healer glanced back at the room for a moment, then refocused on Catra. “I’m sure she would appreciate being cleaned up a little. Perhaps a change of clothes, if you’re careful.”

“I will be,” Catra said suddenly. “I…”

Catra again found herself wanting to offer a hug, offer kinder words. She wanted to say how truly grateful she was, but she couldn’t. “Thank you.” She said. It was the best she could do. 

“Keep her head cradled if you move her. Don’t scrub too hard on her back...you’ll see why. Please don’t do it alone, either. She’s a very strong woman, I wouldn't recommend lifting her on your own.” 

“Of course,” Catra took a step towards the room and laid her hand across the doorknob. She hesitated, looking back to the healer. “I...I don’t know your name.” 

A smile. “Helena.” 

Catra found herself smiling too. “Thank you, Helena.” 

* * *

Glimmer was the only person Catra felt comfortable doing this with. It wasn’t hard to convince her. In fact, Glimmer seemed taken back by Catra’s request, in a good way. She smiled and nodded and followed her into the room she shared with Adora. 

“Where do you want to start?” Glimmer asked, setting down the bucket of water they’d made with a pair of rags on either side. 

Catra studied her girlfriend, still sleeping and resting and hopefully healing. “We’ll start from the bottom and work our way up.” 

Glimmer nodded and scooped up the bucket while Catra moved down to Adora’s lower half and pulled the blanket off of her. 

She was wearing her grey shorts and a tank top to match. They were the clothes she had on underneath her outfit from the day before. What was left of it, after the attack. 

“She’s gonna be devastated about her jacket,” Catra said as she sat down on the bed and placed Adora’s feet in her lap. “It was like...her first possession in the Horde. The first thing she found and was able to keep. It didn’t even fit her when she found it, but she loved it and kept it.”

Glimmer smiled as she rang out a wet rag and handed it to Catra. “It didn’t really fit her now. She had just about grown out of it.” Gently, Catra ran the cloth along Adora’s feet and up her ankles. Glimmer had moved to the closet, digging through Adora’s clothes. “I swear all of her shirts are a size too small.” 

This made Catra smile. “She’d never admit it, but Adora likes showing off a little.” 

“I guess I can’t blame her. She certainly works hard enough.” 

That made Catra stop, the cloth just above Adora’s knee. “She’s going to be frustrated when she wakes up and can’t train like she used to.” 

“Did the healers tell you something?”

Catra shrugged. “Just that it’ll be awhile before she’s really okay. If...if she can’t transform and she can’t heal, then her injuries will take time like they would for anyone else.” 

“We don’t know yet if she can’t transform.” Glimmer said as she returned with a pair of grey sweat pants and a matching tank top. “She-ra has overcome a lot.”

“Then why did she abandon Adora in the fight?” 

“Catra…”

“Look, I get it. I know She-ra is important. I’m just tired of seeing Adora get hurt because of it.” 

“I know,” Glimmer said, sitting down on the bed as well and using the other rag to help. “But She-ra is important to Adora, you know that better than anyone.” It was true. She-ra allowed Adora to help people, better than anyone in Etheria. That was Adora’s destiny. Not to be a weapon or a beacon or a symbol - just to have the ability to help. That’s all she even wanted to do.

For better or worse, Adora had this idea in her head that her value diminished if she wasn’t doing her absolute best for everyone else. It was something they’d talked about, something Adora had worked on - trying to be more selfish.

She struggled with it, even now.

They fell silent as they kept working. Taking their time to be careful and thorough. Adora had scrapes and marks all down her legs. None of them were too severe, which made Catra feel better. 

It was strange to do this, she knew Adora’s body like a map - one she’d studied for years now. Even when they were just cadets in the Horde sharing a bed together, she always paid attention. 

So when they moved upward to take care of Adora’s top, Catra was not ready for what she saw. She held Adora upright as Glimmer lifted Adora’s tank top over her head. 

What they saw made Catra’s blood boil. She must have reacted as such because Melog made a sound of despair from the floor and tried to jump onto the bed behind Catra. 

There were burns all across her back. Catra could remember the waves of magic pulsing off of her as she knelt down in the dirt while they hurt her, but she never imagined it would scar Adora this way. 

Catra couldn’t handle it. She held Adora close, kissing on her shoulder and neck. She wanted to go back in time and stop them from ever going to Tiptree. 

She just wanted Adora to wake up and tell her they would be okay. That was Adora’s job - to be the optimist and remind Catra that the world wasn’t terrible. 

“They’ll heal,” Glimmer said, rubbing Catra’s shoulder. “Take a breath, Catra. She’s okay.” 

Catra held on, pressing her forehead into the nape of Adora’s neck before slowly pulling away. 

They were careful as they washed her, as gentle as Catra had ever been in her life. Claws safely retracted as she let the water slowly pour down Adora’s back and drop onto the towel Glimmer had laid out under them. 

By the time they were finished and Adora was dressed in fresh clothes, Catra was barely functional. The long night before catching up to the miserably slow day she’d had. 

Just as they were about to lay Adora back down, Glimmer spoke. “You know, we could probably scoot her over a bit...leave a little room on the bed.” She had that look in her eye. The one where she’d already made a decision, but she wanted the other person to think it was their idea. 

Catra knew better than to believe that, but damn if it wasn’t a fantastic idea. “I knew I liked you.” 

“It was just a matter of time, really.” Glimmer laughed softly and the two of them slid Adora over a few feet, putting her on one side of the bed. “You should try and sleep. You look...well…”

“Like shit?” 

Glimmer winced. “I wasn’t going to be so crass but...yeah.” 

Sparkles had a point, Catra was barely standing and she had no idea what time it was - time didn’t even matter. 

Still, she had to do that thing Perfuma always told her about - where she reminded people how much they mattered to her. 

She pulled Glimmer in for a hug, an unexpected one that made Glimmer squeak in surprise. 

“Thank you.” 

Glimmer very quickly responded, putting her arms around Catra. “Of course.” Catra wasn’t sure if she was just tired or going soft, but she held on a little longer than usual. “You know,” Glimmer whispered. “Bow’s going to be super jealous when I tell him about this.”

Catra decided that was enough and pulled away, sticking a finger in Glimmer’s face. “Don’t you tell anyone about this. I have a reputation to uphold here.”

“Pfft, no you don’t.” Glimmer pushed her back towards the bed. “Now sleep, that’s an order.” 

A moment later, Glimmer teleported away. 

Suddenly Catra was left alone with Adora and the world around her was quiet - more than it had been in the last two days. If Glimmer had ordered her to rest, she knew that nobody would bother them. Not unless Adora needed something. 

She was so tired, her body felt like it was ready to give out on her at any moment. 

Catra grabbed their blanket and carefully laid it across Adora, leaving an opening on her side to join. 

She climbed in slowly, careful not to bump Adora or really disturb her in any way. Even if she kind of wanted to, just to see if that would make those pretty blue eyes open. 

They didn’t, not yet. 

_Soon._ She thought...hoped. 

Catra rolled onto her side, facing Adora. She reached up and traced her finger along Adora’s jaw. 

Whatever it took, whatever Adora needed from her, she was ready. She’d be there, for however long was necessary. 

She-ra might be everyone’s hero. She might be Adora’s destiny, but for Catra...this was all that mattered. This girl - the only good thing Catra had in her life for so long.

The rest of the universe would have to fight her to take that away.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for the awesome feedback so far. I'm having a blast writing these two. They're just so...GOOD lol. Such a fantastic pair. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy chapter three :)

_ Ow _

That was Adora’s first thought when she opened her eyes. 

Everything hurt and she had no idea why. She recognized the ceiling above her - Bright Moon. That wasn’t right, they were in Tiptree. 

How did she end up here? 

Why did it hurt to breathe?

She tried to move, to sit up and seek out answers, but her body refused to cooperate. Her back felt like it was on fire and even the slightest attempt to adjust made it hurt worse. 

That was when the panic started to set in, because something was  _ wrong _ and she didn’t know why. Why was she in so much pain? The fight must have gone bad, she must have been hurt. 

If she was hurt then what about everyone else? 

What about Catra?

“Catra,” when she spoke, her throat grated like sandpaper. “Catra…” She tried again, with little success. It all hurt so much.

A soft mewl next to her grabbed Adora’s attention. She shifted her eyes to see Melog hovering near her. 

Melog moved in close, nudging their head into Adora’s chin. Searching for her strength, Adora managed to reach up and softly rubbed her fingertips across their mane. Even that was hard to do. 

She must have taken a heavy hit. 

From there, Melog shifted their attention and Adora turned her head to the side. That was when she saw Catra, lying on some chairs next to her, fast asleep. 

“Catra,” she called but had help this time when Melog pressed their nose into Catra’s cheek. 

She blew a puff of air out of her mouth, it was cute, and when Melog nudged her again, Catra’s eyes fluttered open. 

“Hmmm,” she purred. “Melog, stop. I’m up, okay?” It took her a moment, but when their eyes met, Catra gasped. “Adora!” She cried, sitting up in a flurry that sent Melog crashing off the chair bed. “Adora,” her voice broke and she slumped over, face settling in the crook of Adora’s neck. 

With the one hand she’d managed to free from under the blankets, Adora laid it across the back of Catra’s head. “Hey you,” she was so relieved to have Catra here. Her mind was still so full of blanks from what happened and everything still hurt, but Catra was here, so it couldn’t have been too bad. 

“Adora,” Catra repeated. “I love you so much. I…” she pulled back for a moment, looking into Adora’s eyes and then she kissed her. Furious little pecks all over Adora’s face. “How do you feel?” She asked, creating a little distance between them. 

Adora took a deep breath, her back crying out in pain. “Hurts,” was all she could say, her throat was still dry and scratchy. 

Catra nodded, tears brimming in her eyes. “I’ll go find the healers, they can help.”

“Stay,” Adora said, and Catra hesitated above her, unsure. “Just...for a minute, please.” 

Slowly, Catra laid down on top of her as carefully as she could. Adora put her hand back in Catra’s hair and tried to keep her mind from racing. 

It wasn’t like Catra to fret this much. Adora knew Catra loved her, but to see her this shaken was telling. Whatever happened had been bad. 

Eventually, Catra did have to go and find someone who actually knew what they were doing. Very suddenly, Adora’s quiet was filled with noise and people rushing all around her. Asking her questions and poking her with cold metal. 

So much of it was a blur to her. 

She remembered traveling to Tiptree and sitting around the fire with everyone. The walk to the last known attack was fuzzy at best and everything after that was gone. 

Catra, Glimmer and Bow all stayed close. She could see them in the doorway when the healers were looking over her and talking to her. That was when she knew she was really hurt. She loved her friends, but to have them stay so close, look so worried, after all they’d been through together, was scary. 

She was asked a lot of questions. Most of them, she didn’t have any answers for. What happened? What did they do to you? Did they say anything? Threaten to do anything? 

Adora didn’t remember, she tried, she wanted to, but she couldn’t. It was as if the entire fight was just...gone. 

When the questions that suddenly felt like an interrogation were near the end, Adora had a question of her own.

“Can I transform?” 

The healers gave each other a look. The tall man was clearly waiting to see what the much smaller woman would say. She sighed and put her clipboard behind her back. “We don’t know. According to the others, when the magical explosion happened,  _ you _ took the brunt of it. Not She-ra. By that point, it was just you.” 

“I should try,” Adora said, if she could transform, she could heal. She wasn’t entirely sure if she could transform on her back, in bed, with a body that felt like it’d been treated worse than one of Sea Hawk’s wrecked ships. 

Still, she knew if she just transformed, she could make all of that go away. She’d done it so many times before. Even if healing wasn’t her favorite thing to do - because the pain never went away completely. Healing would make the scars and the wounds disappear. There were times that Adora wished she could just deal with the sharp pain for a shorter amount of time, than the dull ache that came with healing that seemed to last for days.

Anything was better than this, though.

“Adora,” that was Catra and when she looked in her direction, Catra was moving towards her. “You should wait...you...you’re not in any shape to do this.” 

“I have to try, Catra. If I can heal then I can get out of bed and help.” The prospect of spending multiple days trying to recover was unsettling. “I’ll be okay.” 

Catra’s brow creased in frustration, Adora felt bad, but she had to know. 

Thankfully, Catra didn’t say anything else, and Glimmer moved to her side for support. 

Everyone in the room stayed quiet, if Adora were honest, she kind of hated it. She’d transformed in a ton of situations - most of them life threatening. But to be the center of attention like this, with everyone watching and waiting, it was hard to focus. 

Taking a deep breath, that made the injuries on her back sting, Adora closed her eyes. 

It was so routine, to find that strength inside of her, that rush of energy and call upon it to come out of her. She had done it so many times, but everything was cloudy now. 

“For the honor...of…”

Her muscles seized, her head was spinning and she couldn’t focus. She couldn’t feel the power inside of her - all she felt was pain. 

_ Let go. _

_ Stop resisting. _

_ All you cause is suffering. _

She saw eyes, gray and empty, forcing her to suffer. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t fight back. A voice telling her over and over again to give up. 

There was a fight. There was chaos all around her. The forest burning. Her friends fading away. 

They were hurting her. 

She begged the pain to stop. 

“Please…” Adora’s voice cracked, his face was burned into her mind now. She couldn’t remember him seconds before now she couldn’t stop seeing him. “Please don’t.” She was so scared.

“Adora!” Someone said her name, she tried to move away. Someone wanted to hurt her again. “Adora!” Again and again they called her name. She just wanted it to stop. She wanted the pain to stop. “Do something for her!” 

_ What’s happening to me? _

She tried to move, her body wouldn’t respond, but she kept trying. Someone was grabbing her, multiple hands were on her, holding her down. They were going to hurt her, they wanted to kill her. 

Maybe...maybe she deserved it. 

“Please…” Suddenly, her body stopped fighting. Her muscles loosened and her heartbeat slowed. Everything went quiet. 

* * *

When Adora woke up again, it was dark and everyone that was in her room before had left. Well, almost everyone, there was still someone next to her in bed. 

When she looked over at Catra, her eyes were open, keeping watch. 

Catra didn’t say anything at first, just reached out and ran a hand over Adora’s cheek, sliding her thumb back and forth.

“Hey,” she said and Adora smiled. 

“Hi,” she whispered back, thankful it was just the two of them. “What happened?” 

The thumb brushing her skin stilled and Catra sighed. “You...you couldn’t transform. You started...kinda freaking out and trying to fall off the bed like an idiot. So...the healers gave you something to help you sleep.” 

Adora remembered what she saw. She remembered how she felt. She had no idea that it had manifested itself outwardly. It was more like a nightmare than anything else. “Oh…” was all she could say, still trying to piece everything together. 

“You…you were calling out for help. Begging for it. Was that from the fight?” 

_ So everything about that breakdown was out loud? _

She didn’t want to lie to Catra, and it made no sense to. Though that didn’t make talking about it any easier. “I think so. It’s kinda fuzzy, but...yeah. I could see...I remembered some of it.” 

_ I remember how scared I was. _

“You...want to talk about it?” 

Adora looked around, realizing that she and Catra were alone, that always made it easier. “I was just...grey eyes...chanting something, The fight...it was so strange. At first I was just dodging magic and getting in some hits, then that man, the one with the beard. He just...started funneling magic at me in waves. I...I couldn’t slow it down.”

Catra nodded, now holding her hand. “They separated us from you during the fight. Definitely the plan and it definitely worked. I...we couldn’t get to you fast enough.”

“Good,” Adora said and immediately knew it was the wrong thing to say. Still, that was how she felt. “If you’d been caught in it, or anyone…”

“We could have helped you.” Catra bit back, but her gentle touch never wavered. “It doesn’t matter. You’re okay and we’ll...figure it out from here.”

“If I could just…”

“You should hold off on the transformation attempts for now...until you’re feeling better.” 

That was not what she wanted to hear. “I won’t get any better lying in bed all day.” 

“It’s been one day.” 

“I have to do something.”

Catra’s eyes narrowed. “No, you don’t. You’re hurt. You can rest, Adora. Etheria won’t collapse without you for a few days.” 

Adora felt her frustration kicking in. “We have to find the people who did this, Catra.”

“Adora…” Catra actually growled, but it didn’t carry as much weight with how gently she was still touching Adora’s face. “They’re gone, okay. They...whatever they did to you, it took them out in the process.” 

“What?” That couldn’t be right. 

“There was no sign of them, and according to the report from Perfuma, there’s still nothing. Just a crater and a bunch of dead trees she’s crying about. They...they had a mission. They knew we’d come and they knew...what they wanted to do.” 

Catra’s grip on her hand tightened, Melog rested his head on Catra’s lap - calming her. 

The truth hit Adora hard. People actually threw away their own lives just so they could try and kill her? People she’d never even met before? They wanted her dead so badly that they sacrificed themselves. All she’d ever tried to do was help people.

_ When has that ever mattered? _

“It still makes me uncomfortable that I can’t help. What if there’s more of them?”

“Then we’ll deal with it.” Catra said, and when Adora opened her mouth to argue, Catra spoke over her. “Will you just…stop, for tonight, please? I promise you, tomorrow we will figure out what to do next. Bow even suggested a trip to Mystacor. Something about saunas and healing waters and magical garbage. He was annoyingly excited about it.” 

Mystacor. 

“That’s a great idea!”

Catra rolled her eyes. “Yeah, like that.” 

“I always wanted to take you there,” Adora smiled at the thought. “Maybe not under these circumstances.” 

“We can still make the most of it.” Catra said and Adora nodded. She didn’t really believe it, given how she felt and how she could barely move. “You really scared me,” Catra tried to hide her emotion behind a laugh.

She wasn’t looking at Adora, maybe shy or embarrassed, Adora wasn’t sure which, but she knew Catra struggled with stuff like this. “I’m sorry, “

Catra shook her head. “Don’t apologize,” she snapped, but Adora didn’t flinch. “It’s not your fault that people suck.” 

“It’s always going to be something, isn’t it?” When Catra finally looked at her, Adora smiled. 

“Seems that way,” she pouted. “I’m officially done holding you, unconscious, in my arms though.”

Adora laughed, it hurt, but she enjoyed the feeling. “Two times too many?” Catra nodded, trying to smile. “It’s nice though...to have you there...to catch me.”

That made Catra groan, which only made Adora laugh more. “You’re so cheesy, I hate it. You and Bow have to stop reading those stupid romance books of Mermista’s.”

“You love it,” 

“I don’t, really.” 

“I have to pee.” She said suddenly, not even meaning to say it out loud. 

Catra looked like she got caught stealing cake in the kitchens.

“I...uh...the healers were taking care of...that. I don’t know how, I don’t want to know how, but they said they were.” Adora doesn’t really want to think about that either. She knew magic could do amazing things but that seemed...a bit much. “I can go get them?”

“No,” Adora waved her off. “It’s really late and I just...the bathroom is right over there. I’ll be…”

“Adora, you can barely move.”

“Then you’ll have to help me.”

Catra groaned. “Why are you so difficult?” 

“I’m not difficult. Difficult would be waking a bunch of people up for me to use the bathroom.”

“So not difficult is just bothering me then?”

Adora laughed, not entirely sure where it came from, but Catra had the cutest pout. “I promise to make it up to you?” 

“Oh?” Catra sounded ready to argue, but she was already climbing out of bed. “By resting and relaxing and letting your body heal before throwing yourself into danger again?” 

Catra has moved to the other side of the bed, pulling Adora’s blanket down and helping her sit up. “I can probably do that.”

“Probably,” Catra sighed as she very carefully lifted Adora. 

It hurt, pretty badly but not bad enough she couldn’t mask it a little. The pain in her back ran deep, not just from the scars and burns they had told her about, but on the inside. Her bones ached, they’d told her her ribs were bruised pretty badly from the explosion, but her  _ back _ was the worst of it. 

Gently, Catra drew Adora’s legs over to the edge of the bed and paused to take in their current situation. 

Adora wasn’t entirely sure what the plan was, she just knew that whatever it was, she wasn’t going to complain. 

“Okay, this...is gonna suck.” Catra said, before turning around and kneeling down in front of Adora. “Wrap your arms around my neck and I’ll casualty carry you to the bathroom.”

“Oh wow,” Adora felt like she was having a flashback. “We haven’t done this in a long time.” 

“Horde protocols do come in handy from time to time.” Adora reached out and put her arms around Catra’s neck. Even that made her back tense up a bit, but she kept her mouth shut. “If you get hurt more because of this it’s your fault.”

“I know,” and she did, because she knew deep down that Catra had a hard time saying no to her. She just knew they could do this and spare her the indignity of bringing strangers into their room because she had to pee. 

“On three. One, two,  _ three _ .” The three came out with a groan and Adora leaned into Catra’s back, arms around her neck and rose to her feet. 

It was probably because she’d been lying down the entire time, but when she did finally stand again, Adora’s back pain traveled down to her hips and through her legs. It hurt, like a knife sliding across her skin. She used every bit of strength and resolve she had to keep the cry of pain buried in her throat.

“You good?” Catra asked, looking back over her shoulder at Adora. 

“I’m good,” Adora kept her voice as steady as she could. 

Slowly, they moved through their room and towards the bathroom. Catra dragging Adora along far better than Adora could have expected. They did train together every day, but sometimes Adora forgot how strong Catra was.

The bathroom door was closed, because of course it was, and when Catra let go of Adora’s arm to open it, she nearly slid down Catra’s back and onto the floor. 

She planted her feet in the ground, making the pain in her hip flare up enough that she couldn’t stop herself from crying out a little. 

“Adora!” 

“It’s fine,” she said quickly, biting her lip. “Just...just surprised me.” 

Catra shook her head and gestured at the door for Melog to help.. “You’re a terrible liar.” 

“I know,” was all she could say. Thankfully, Melog got the message and jumped up on his hind legs, pressing the bathroom door handle down and pushed it open.

Once they were inside, Catra backed up against the wall and slowly let Adora go. She leaned back, her butt pressing against a basket meant to hold the towels and right now, meant to hold her up as well. 

Catra turned quickly to help her balance, suddenly they were face to face in their bathroom with a whole new mountain to climb. “All good?” Catra asked again and Adora nodded. 

She was, mostly, if not a little nervous. Everything still hurt, but not as bad as it did before. She considered that a victory. “Not exactly how you usually take my clothes off.” She said, kind of hating herself for it. 

“Well at least you’re not talking about it and making it even more awkward.” Catra knelt in front of Adora and slowly pulled her shorts down. “This had better be the best pee of your life.”

“Certainly the most well earned.” That made Catra laugh and the tension in the room faded a bit. 

Catra placed her hands on Adora’s side, carefully helping her stand up from the basket. If this were any other situation, Catra’s hands on her bare skin would start a whole different kind of struggle. Tonight though, Adora just wanted this to go as fast as possible. 

Together, they turned, Adora’s legs doing all they could to help - which wasn’t much. The drop to the toilet was further than the one to the basket and she landed harder than expected. 

It hurt, but she kept herself from making any noises of discomfort this time. “Can you keep yourself up?” She asked, slowly taking her hands away. 

When Adora didn’t feel herself immediately falling over, she knew she was okay. “Yeah, thank you.” Catra stood up to give Adora some privacy, but Adora grabbed her hand to stop her. “Seriously, thank you. I love you.” 

Catra smiled, the best one Adora had seen all day. “Consider yourself lucky, you’re the only person I’d ever do this for.” 

Catra had a hundred different ways of saying ‘I love you, too’. Adora would add that one to the list. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who has read and kudos'd and to those of you who have left comments and feedback, just know it means a lot and is so motivating. If you like the story, please take the time to let me know - I really appreciate it. 
> 
> Been having so much fun writing this.

Catra had only been to Mystacor one other time, it was a quick trip that didn’t really leave much of an imprint. But she was convinced that no matter how many times she would come here, she would never not be annoyed by the entrance. She understood the idea, especially when the Horde was running around Etheria, to hide like this made sense, but it was so _extra_. 

Of course, all that extra meant Bow loved everything about it. He was practically bouncing as he went over all the things he wanted to do. 

Catra wanted to complain, to tell him to shut up and stop bumping into her with his little jumps, but she couldn’t today. Not when he’d left Glimmer back in Bright Moon to do the heavy lifting on what happened at Tiptree while they brought Adora here to heal. 

It wasn’t a vacation, not really, but it was also a trip away from home where they were supposed to relax and spend most of their time in healing waters and cloudy beaches. 

So it was a not-vacation vacation. 

Regardless of what it was, it was what Adora needed. 

Adora’s excitement about the trip faded a little when she woke up to leave only to discover that she hadn’t magically healed overnight and couldn’t properly stand on her own. That led to her having to use a wheelchair, one leftover from a fall Spinnerella had on her ankle that left her immobile for a few days. 

Now, it was Adora’s chair and she was _not_ happy about it. Catra understood, even at her physical peak, Adora could be restless. Movement was a huge part of Adora’s life, always had been. She loved to be running and jumping and fighting. 

Today was a part of getting her back to that, but Catra knew it would be a slow process - the healers had told her as much. That didn’t stop Adora from making a plan. She had a strategy already created for what her recovery was going to be. Her training schedule. Her resting periods, her meals and stretching - anything she could think of to make this all go faster. 

The chair was not a part of that plan and had already thrown everything off balance. Thankfully, Adora was stubborn enough that she was determined to make this work.

Catra just hoped she could help. 

Regardless, Adora was cranky so Catra was fully prepared for today to be long. She could live with cranky Adora, so long as she could be here to offer support. Besides, Bow was here to take part of the hit. 

Once they finally, officially made it, and Catra gave herself a moment to let her stomach settle from the ridiculous magic used to enter, a slew of people were waiting for them. 

“You’re here!” Glimmer’s aunt threw her hands in the air and slipped between her guards to greet them. “Had to rush to get everything ready when Glimmer contacted me yesterday. I couldn’t do as much as I would have liked, though the feast tonight promises to be outstanding.” 

Catra didn’t hate the sound of that. 

“Sorry to come on such short notice, but Adora wanted to get to work as soon as possible.” Bow put his hand on Adora’s shoulder and she smiled a bit when Castaspella met her eyes. 

“Thank you for letting me...recover here.”

Something in Castaspella’s eyes changed. The exciting greeting faded and she knelt down in front of Adora. “I’m sorry you have to go through this. I promise, the power of our waters will do you wonders.” 

“Thanks,” Adora smiled as best she could. “We won’t be a bother for long, just a few days of work and I should be back on my feet.” 

Catra’s grip on the handles of Adora’s wheelchair tightened. She really hoped that was true. 

“Excellent!” Castaspella rose back to her feet. “Then I’ll have a few of the guards take you to the hot springs and when you’re ready, we can begin the feast!” 

* * *

Despite the circumstance, watching Adora take her top off was still incredibly high on the list of Catra’s favorite things in the world. Her broad shoulders and incredible abs were a great way for Catra to forget how much she was dreading having to be near the water. 

Adora was wearing a white bikini top with gold laces. It was odd to see her so fragile, in a chair and hardly able to hold up her own weight, yet she still looked like she could go head to head with a brick wall and make the wall regret it. 

“You look good,” Catra said, walking over to Adora and kneeling down in front of her. 

Adora looked away. She never took compliments well. “I doubt that.”

Catra shrugged. “I call it like I see it.” She closed the gap between them and gave Adora a soft kiss. That would never not be surreal to her, no matter how many years she was allowed to do it. “So what’s the plan?” 

“Okay, so I figured we’d start with balance, just walking at first to get my legs loosened up. I’m thinking 15 back and forth. Not too many.” She looked so hopeful and her voice bursting with excitement. “Then I’ll get to swimming, it might not be easy, but it would be good for my body to get moving again, you know? Whole body. I won’t do much, probably just ten laps back and forth. I would like to try and get out on my own, at least to the top step of the pool.” 

It was all so Adora, so thought out and well prepared. Catra could only imagine how many times Adora had played this training session in her head since they decided to come here. 

On the other hand, all Catra could see was the night before. Remembering how heavy Adora was on her back, she could barely hold any weight on her legs right now. She knew these pools were magical, but it sounded like Adora was hoping for a miracle. 

Despite her concerns, Catra wasn’t about to wipe that smile off her face. “Then let’s go find Bow.”

It was easy to find Bow, he was already splashing around and playing in the water. “I love Mystacor! We really need to get a pool or two set up in Bright Moon.”

“There are lakes all over the place.” Catra rolled her eyes, wheeling Adora close to the edge. 

“Yeah, and they’re filled with big creatures with big teeth.” 

Catra shrugged. “Take your arrows.” 

“You can’t shoot a bow underwater.”

“Have you tried?” 

He opened his mouth to respond, but paused and shut it for a moment. “I...I guess not.” 

“Come on, Arrow Boy, let’s do this.” 

Together, Bow and Catra helped Adora out of her chair. She leaned against Catra as they sat her on the top step, her feet in the water. “I’ll start with a few laps back and forth, to get my legs going. From there, I’ll swim for a bit and then we can work on tossing a ball around to work my arms and shoulders.”

Adora having a game plan wasn’t a surprise. She _always_ had a game plan. She had so many ideas she wanted to do, meanwhile Catra was still sitting beside her and holding up a fair amount of her weight.

“Alright,” Bow was on the step below her. “Let’s get started then!” He held out his arms and Adora pushed forward. She winced in pain at the effort, but Catra couldn’t get the word out to tell her to slow down before she reached the edge of the step.

Catra slid as far to the edge as she could, still holding onto Adora’s shoulders and trying like hell to keep her back from rubbing against the lip of the pool. 

Once she was in the water, Catra loosened her grip a little, letting Bow take over. Catra had no desire to get in the water - at all. She loved Adora, and would die for her, but she was going to try and avoid getting wet as much as she possibly could. 

“O - Okay,” Adora’s confident tone had faded already. “Just a few laps.” She was holding onto Bow’s shoulders as tightly as she could. Catra could see her shoulders shaking.

When Bow took a step back, Adora started to fall. He caught her, of course, but as soon as any extra weight was given to her, she couldn’t handle it.

Catra could feel her tail going wild, she was so anxious. She just knew it wasn’t going the way Adora had planned. It couldn’t. She’d nearly been killed just a few days ago. 

“You okay?” Bow asked and Adora refused to look at him, instead staring down at her feet in the pool.

“Yeah,” she nodded too quickly, she spoke with too much false confidence. Bow took a much more careful step away from her, his hands at her side. When Adora tried to follow, she tensed and struggled, almost falling into him as she strained herself. “Why is this so hard?” She asked, her voice shaky and confused. 

“Take your time, Adora. It’s not a race.” Catra said, moving along the edge of the pool, trying to stay close. 

It took a long time, and Catra found her adoration for Bow growing with every patient step he took with Adora, as carefully as he could. Catra felt so helpless, watching Adora react to each frustrating movement she fought to make. 

By the time they made it to the far end of the pool, Adora was fighting to catch her breath and there were tears in her eyes. 

Catra moved on all fours, leaning over the water to reach out and brush a loose strand from Adroa’s ponytail out of her face. “You did good,” she said, knowing the reaction she would get. 

“I can barely walk.” Adora glared at her, one of those tears sliding free. Catra was there to wipe it away. 

“But you made it,” Bow said, his smile as bright as ever. “Now we have to go back.” 

With a sigh, Adora nodded. All of her excitement was gone. Catra wished it was her. She wished she’d been the one hurt. She wanted to take all of this away from Adora. If she could, she gladly would. 

The trip back took longer, Adora was tired and by the end of it, Catra could tell that Bow was doing most of the work. Still, Adora was moving and trying and that had to be good for her. These waters were healing, moving in them and doing this would help her. 

It was good, but not at all what Adora had wanted. 

As they returned to the starting point, Catra was there - ready to do whatever she could to help. Bow guided Adora down onto the step for her to sit and rest. She was clearly in pain, her back slumping into Catra’s waiting arms. She was wet, Catra resisted the urge to hiss as the water hit her fur. 

Adora was sniffling just a bit. “There’s no way I’ll be ready in three days.” 

“So we’ll stay longer,” Catra said, that was simple enough. 

“I’ll stay for as long as I can, but I know Glimmer will need me back for her trip to Salineas.” He looked up at Catra with a far too toothy smile. “So...you’ll have to take my place.”

_Oh no…_

“I…” she took a deep breath. “I can do that,” she could say it as nonchalantly as she wanted. When the moment came, it would be awful. “Besides, maybe Adora won’t need help three days from now.” 

“I will,” Adora said. “I made one trip across the pool and I’m exhausted - Bow practically carried me. I just…” She stopped, her head hanging. Bow and Catra locked eyes, neither of them knowing what to say. “I don’t understand.” 

Catra pressed her nose into Adora’s still dry hair. “I know.” 

It was quiet for a long time, Bow standing close by, Catra still hovering on the edge and Adora sitting on the step, lost in thought. 

After a while, Bow’s impatience won out and he spoke first. “You want to do another lap?” 

Adora shook her head. “I’m too tired. I think I’ll go try and nap before dinner.” 

“Okay,” Catra said. She hated this. She hated seeing Adora so upset. “Let’s get you outta there.”

Exiting the pool was much harder than getting into it. A lot more of the responsibility was on Catra to do the heavy lifting. Adora tried, Catra knew she did, but her body just wasn’t ready yet. So Together, she and Bow lifted Adora out of the pool and put her back into the chair that Catra had laid a towel over. 

Once she was securely in, Bow fell back into the pool to play more and Catra was left to tend to Adora. She knelt down in front of her, grabbing the edges of the towel and running them up and down Adora’s arms.

Adora wouldn’t look at her, intent to stare at the water with a frown on her face that never belonged there. 

Catra wasn’t about to let her wallow. She reached out and tipped up Adora’s chin to meet their eyes. “Hey, we’ll get through this. We always do, remember?” Adora nodded, though her expression didn’t change. “Come on, let’s go see how the beds are in magic land.” 

* * *

Dinner in Mystacor was an event. Catra knew people with magic could be extra, she’d spent enough time around princesses to learn that, but the sorcerers in Mystacor were on another level. 

The meal was cooked in front of them, with a lot of magical fire and unnecessary showmanship. People clapped at certain things, and Catra found herself waiting on Bow for the social queue of what noise to make and how to react. 

When he clapped, she clapped. When he went ‘ooh’ and ‘ahh’, Catra...well Catra didn’t do that. She wasn’t an ‘ooher’ or an ‘ahher’, but she’d smile and pretend it was really cool. 

And some of it was cool, but it was just food and having grown up without it for so long, she didn’t understand making a show of it all - she just wanted to eat. 

It was hard to concentrate entirely because Adora was about as disinterested in all of this as Catra was, which stood out the most because this was the kind of thing Adora usually loved. She tried, she pretended to smile just like Catra, but when the focus would return to the food, Catra could see her smile fade and her eyes look down, lost in thought. 

This wasn’t the place to ask about it, or bring any unwanted attention Adora’s way. So instead, Catra reached under the table and touched Adora’s hand with her own. When Adora looked over at her and slowly flipped her hand over to hold Catra’s, she felt a wave of relief. 

She knew Adora was going through a lot, so the last thing she wanted was for Adora to pull away from her. So far, so good.

When the show _finally_ ended and the food was actually ready to eat, Catra thought Bow might suck his plate up like a vacuum. She couldn’t really blame him, she was starving too, and fish was _easily_ her favorite non-Horde meal.

“So, how was your first session, Adora?” Castaspella spoke from across the big, round table. 

Catra cast a glance Adora’s way, not surprised by the smile she saw. “It was great! The pools here really do wonders.” Adora had always been very good at being okay when she really wasn’t. She didn’t like people to fuss over her. Didn’t want them to worry. She could smile and nod and be what they needed her to be, so long as it kept them from worrying about her. 

“If you need anything else, a personal healer or some specific spell to relieve pain, feel free to let me know.” 

“Of course,” Adora took a bite of food, most likely to give herself the chance to stop forcing that smile. 

Catra decided to shift the conversation. “It’s probably going to take a little longer than the three days we’d planned to get Adora ready to go back home.”

Castsapella’s face lit up. “You’re more than welcome to stay for as long as you’d like!” She practically threw her hands in the air. “And don’t you worry about amenities and clothes, we have plenty for you to borrow, no need to make any unnecessary trips. Oh, and that means you’ll be here for the ball!”

“There’s...a ball?” Catra did not like the sound of that. 

“A _ball_!” Bow groaned. “Ugh, I wish I could stay longer, but I’ll have to go back and travel with Glimmer to Selineas. It’ll just be Adora and Catra.”

“Aw, that’s too bad, but I promise, you girls will love it!” 

Catra and Adora’s eyes met, Catra smiled at her and felt heat rise in her cheeks when Adora smiled back. 

It was crazy that Adora could still do that to her, a simple smile reminding Catra of how far they’d come. 

The food was obnoxiously good and Catra ate more than she probably should have. But fish was a weakness and well cooked fish should probably be illegal because Catra would do some pretty awful things to get her claws on a properly cooked piece of fish. 

She did, unfortunately, notice that Adora didn’t eat very much. That wasn’t a good sign. Even during the hardest of times in the Horde or when they were fighting Prime, Adora was never shy during meal time. 

This was new territory for them. They’d dealt with Shadow Weaver’s abuse - still were in some ways. The always looming threat of Hordak. They’d fought together and against one another in battle. Overcome mind control and super weapons. 

But this was so much simpler than all of that, yet it was somehow more difficult to navigate. Adora was struggling and Catra didn’t know how to help. She knew Adora’s body would recover. The healers had told her as much, but this was more than that. Even if Catra didn’t fully understand the importance of She-ra to the rest of the world, she knew what it meant to Adora. 

All Catra knew was that She-ra and Adora had trouble co-existing. It seemed like the world was intent on ripping them apart and Adora’s life was dedicated to trying to maintain her bond to the hero of Etheria. 

Catra would help in any way she could, but at the end of the day, her loyalty was to Adora. 

“You’re fading on me,” Catra said, drawing Adora’s sleepy blue eyes up to her. “Want to call it a night?” 

Adora pursed her lips, glancing over at Castaspella, who was in the middle of a story that Catra had stopped listening to a while ago. She liked Castaspella well enough, they bonded a few times over their mutual Shadow Weaver hatred, but the woman could _talk_ and most of the time it was about absolutely nothing. 

“Wouldn’t it be rude?” 

Catra shook her head. “Nah, that’s one of the perks of being injured. You can get out of stuff and nobody will question it. Watch,” Catra stood up. “Hey, sorry to interrupt but Adora’s pretty tired from her work today, I think I’ll take her to bed.”

“Oh of course!” Castaspella nearly tripped over her cape trying to stand. “You let me know if you need any more pillows or blankets or perhaps a spell to help you sleep.”

Catra looked down at Adora, a ‘told you’ in her eyes. 

Adora smiled, that big warm smile of hers that she so freely gave to everyone. “Thank you, Casta - for letting us come and stay.”

“You’re more than welcome, all of you.” They all bid goodnight before Catra stepped behind Adora’s chair and started wheeling her out of the room. 

Once they were down the hall and the sounds of Castaspella’s continued story could hardly be heard, Catra leaned down against Adora’s ear. “See, perks.” She was swatted away playfully. 

“We could have just told her you were tired from all that food you ate.”

“Oh _wow_ ,” Catra feigned offense. “That’s a cheap shot, Adora.”

Adora laughed, it was soft and breathy. Catra waited for Adora to say something else, when she didn’t, she let the silence settle over them as they arrived in their guest room. 

It was big, Catra wasn’t sure what it was with magical people but they did _not_ know how to make a normal sized room. There were blue and white drapes over the biggest and most unnecessary windows Catra had ever seen. Yes, the views were nice, but there was no way this room wouldn’t be filled with light at first dawn, waking her up way before she wanted. 

The bed itself was right in the middle of the room. Surrounded by a tall, circular curtain that hung a white, transparent sheet around it. The previous offer from Castaspella for more pillows and blankets seemed ridiculous when Catra saw the seven pillows that were already on the bed, plus two blankets folded neatly at the bottom of an already made bed. 

“What odds do you give the bed here being comfy and not like sinking in quicksand?” 

“Not great,” Adora sounded as tired as she looked. 

Catra decided to switch gears a little, she could be the comforting girlfriend. 

She took a few steps around Adora’s chair and knelt down in front of her. Adora’s looking at her through heavy lids and a soft expression. Catra never could forget how lucky she was. “Tomorrow will be better,” she said, leaning forward and kissing Adora on the cheek. “I know today wasn’t what you wanted, but it’s just the start. We have time and we’ll get through it.” 

When she placed her hand on Adora’s cheek, she melted at the way Adora pressed into her palm. “When did you get so good at all this?” 

“Eh,” Catra shrugged. “Perfuma rambles on a lot about this stuff every time I see her. Ninety percent of this comes from her.” 

The laugh she earned would get her through the misery she had planned for tonight. 

“Can I…” Adora started and stopped herself, face crinkled with doubt. 

“Hey, talk to me.” Catra used her hand to move Adora’s chin up a bit, seeking her attention. “What do you want?” 

“I’d kind of like to take a shower. I...I’m tired of the sponge baths.” 

That was not what she was expecting, but she could imagine how much it had to suck to be washed down like that. Not to mention they hadn’t properly washed Adora’s hair in a few days. 

“I don’t see why not. We’ve made it this far by just making it up - I think we can manage a shower.” 

Adora’s smile was gentle, her eyes watering a little. “Thanks.” She said, grabbing Catra’s hand and kissing the back of it. 

Catra moved Adora close to the shower, leaving her there for a moment as she worked out her gameplan. They couldn’t use the wheelchair, it was too big and it was also the only one they had. 

She could hold Adora, but that would limit her ability to actually help her wash up. 

Looking around the room, this massive room with so much crap in it that Catra could probably sell half of it and nobody would even notice, she found a few chairs lined up against a desk in the corner of the room that seemed fairly useless. 

Walking over, she grabbed one of them and carried it into the bathroom. 

“I don’t think that’s what that chair is for.” 

“Oh come on, nobody’s going to miss it.” Catra sat it in the shower, it fit almost perfectly. “See, made for it.” 

Adora rolled her eyes but didn’t argue further. 

When Catra returned to her, Adora was very carefully taking her top off. She was slow and probably trying her best not to irritate her back, but Catra let her work and waited for her to finish. She knew Adora could do it, she knew Adora probably needed to do it after today. Even something as simple as this might be the kind of victory Adora needed. 

When she finally managed to pull the shirt over her head, Adora let it fall on the floor behind her and took a breath. 

Catra found herself transfixed on the sight of her girlfriend, she’d been wearing less when they were in the pool, but there was something about the intimacy of this moment that had her heart racing. 

“You’re so…” Catra sighed and knelt down in front of her. “My girlfriend is hot.” 

Adora blushed and rolled her eyes and did all those silly, deflective things Adora did whenever Catra complimented her. 

“I’m sure I look great in my little wheelie chair with my hair all over the place and these burn marks on my back.”

Catra forced herself not to flinch at the mention of the burns. If she thought about them long enough, they made her want to tap into who she used to be. The darkness she once lived in. They made her want to hurt people. 

Instead, she focused on keeping that smile on Adora’s face. “You do, you’re hot, Adora. I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules. The First Ones may have been power hungry maniacs, but they have good genetics.” 

“Will you stop being you and help me with the rest of my clothes?” 

Catra smirked. “So you want to stop the foreplay and skip to the good stuff?” 

“Catra,” Adora laughed, the best sound. 

She didn’t say anything else, just went to work helping Adora undress. They’d seen each other naked more than enough for this to be normal. Catra, despite her teasing, knew this wasn’t about anything like that, not tonight. Adora needed to relax and feel comfortable - Catra could do that.

After a little trouble with her pants and trying not to dump her out of the chair while removing them, Adora was ready for her shower. 

When Catra peeled her own top off, Adora looked confused. “What are you doing?” 

“Uh...not getting my best pair of clothes wet.” 

“You’re...getting in?” 

“I mean...I was planning on it. Someone has to clean you up.” 

“Oh…” 

Catra felt a pang of worry settle in her stomach. “Do you...not want me to?” 

“No,” Adora answered quickly. “I just...didn’t think about it. I didn’t know if you want to see…” Adora stopped herself, but Catra knew where it was going. Adora had a hard enough time finding comfort in her own body - now that she had the burn marks, it was probably even harder. “Don’t you hate the water?” 

“Showers I can handle, you can't drown in the shower.” 

“Thank you.” Adora’s voice barely carried.

“Adora, you’re the love of my life, remember? Big kiss in the heart of Etheria. Magical glow. Our love kinda saved the world. This is like...the smallest of things.” 

When Catra took a step to open the shower door, Adora grabbed her by the hand. “No, it’s not,” she said, looking up at Catra with a grateful expression. “Nothing about the last two days has been small. You’ve been...amazing.” 

Sometimes Adora said things to her that Catra didn’t know how to respond to - more often than not she was left with...

“You’re such an idiot.” 

Thankfully, Adora always seemed to know what she meant.

* * *

Only when Catra knew that Adora had fallen deep into sleep did she let herself slip out of bed. The bed sucked, plain and simple. It was too soft and too big and at times it felt like Adora was on another part of Etheria they were so far away. 

But, it did make sneaking out of the room a little easier because when she moved, the side Adora was on didn’t budge. 

It was late and dark and if Catra didn’t have good night vision she would have probably knocked over a least half a dozen of the useless things scattered in this room. Why were there so many empty vases? 

That didn’t matter, all that mattered was getting where she needed to go. Catra scooped up her small bag and slipped out of the room, hoping Adora would sleep through her absence. 

The halls of Mystacor were wide and confusing. She was convinced there were a slew of magically concealed doors just waiting for someone to fall through. 

Thankfully, she’d managed to remember the path to get from here to the healing pools and was able to get there quietly enough that none of the guards noticed. 

What Catra didn’t expect was to hear the sounds of water moving and someone splashing around at this hour. She stepped through the double doors to the pools and rolled her eyes so hard she worried they might never come back. 

“Bow, it’s like midnight, what are you doing?” 

She caught him, mid dolphin, with his hands at his sides, spitting water out of his mouth. He sputtered and coughed when she startled him, falling backwards and splashing around. 

“Catra!” He cried, coming up for air. “What are you doing here?!” 

“No, no, I asked you first.” 

He looked around for a second, confused. “Uh...swimming?” Catra waited for more, but when it didn’t come, she shook her head. “What are you doing?” She held up her swimming suit, the same one she’d worn today when she was wandering around the edge of the pool. “Wait a minute.” His eyes did that thing where they got really big and sparkly and he had that stupid smile on his face. “You’re a secret swimmer aren’t you?! You pretend to hate the water because that’s what cats do but you actually love it!” 

Using her foot, Catra kicked a floaty ball up in the air, caught it and threw it at him. It bounced right off his face and Catra couldn’t hold back her laugh. 

“Secret swimmer,” she shook her head. “It’s no wonder you and Adora got along so well.” She turned her back to bow, putting on a borrowed swim top under the huge nightshirt she’d stolen from Adora years ago. When the straps were secure, she took off the shirt and laid it on a nearby bench.

“Well then...what are you doing?” Bow asked as Catra turned around, her stomach in knots. 

“You said it yourself, you can only stay a few days and then it’s just gonna be me and Adora.” Catra took a few careful steps towards the edge of the pool. She knew this would ruin her night. The shower was one thing - she’d stayed mostly dry outside of her feet and a few splashes. This though, this was engulfing herself in water. Her fur would take so long to dry. She’d be cold and wet and miserable, probably well into the morning - but she had no other choice. “Adora needs to train,” Catra took a deep breath. “Someone has to help her. So…I have to get used to it.” 

His face was doing that dumb thing again. “You. Are. The. Cutest.” 

“I’m going to drown you.” 

“No but seriously,” his tone was just that, serious, and Catra couldn’t tell if she liked it. “You’re doing good.” 

Catra’s chest tightened in a strange way that she didn’t particularly hate. It was weird, hearing things like this. From Adora she could handle it, Adora always said soft stuff like that, but anyone else just didn’t always register. 

It was so...genuine from Bow. She knew him well enough to know he didn’t patronize people. 

So Catra bit down the urge to roll her eyes and say something snarky. Instead she smiled as best she could, not even trying to look him in the eyes and responded quickly. “Thanks.” 

“Do you know how to swim?” 

“Nope,” Catra was never the type of person to take anything lightly. “If you let me drown Adora is going to be so pissed.”

With that, she took a deep breath, and jumped - Bow screaming her name the entire time.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The response to the last chapter was insane. Thank you all so so much for all the feedback and for taking the time to read it. It is so greatly appreciated and motivating. I hope you continue to enjoy what's to come :)

Adora was tired of hearing about how great she was doing. 

Everyone said it. The healers, the guards, the trainers. The day Castaspella decided to sit in during one of her and Catra’s workouts was the longest day Adora could remember having. Every little thing she did was ‘amazing’ even though she knew it wasn’t.

Yes, she was working hard and yes, she was better than she had been a week ago, but she was sick and tired of hearing about how proud everyone was. 

It didn’t feel great. Being able to walk, slowly, underwater was not special. She could only do a few laps before she was winded and getting in and out of the pool was still an annoying chore that made her dread getting in at all some days. She hated the fuss. She hated the spectacle it became to want to do anything. 

If she wanted to train, she had to tell Catra. If she wanted to shower, she had to tell Catra. If she wanted to go outside for a breath of fresh air, she had to tell Catra. 

She was making progress, sure - but she was _ not  _ doing great. 

If there was ever proof needed to show that, tonight was that proof. 

It was late, late enough that Adora couldn’t even hear the sound of the castle guards moving outside their room. The lights outside of Mystacor had been dimmed almost completely and the moon hung high in the sky. 

Adora was up, because her body hated her, and she desperately needed to go to the bathroom. But she didn’t want to be a burden. 

Catra had been amazing over the past few weeks. More than Adora ever could have imagined. She was there, every day, ready to help. She lifted Adora out of bed. She helped Adora wash up and change her clothes. Anything she needed, Catra was there. Ready to jump in the pool with her even though Adora knew she hated it. 

Not once had Catra complained - despite Adora being downright miserable lately. 

So tonight, when Catra looked so comfortable and had mentioned more than once how tired she was, Adora really  _ really _ didn’t want to bother her. 

The last few days had sucked, but she was working hard and she could make a few laps in the pool on her own. So why couldn’t she do this? There was a time where she jumped across rocks in  _ space _ taking out fleets of Horde Prime clones. Twenty steps to the bathroom couldn’t be that hard.

She had to try, Catra didn’t need to be bothered tonight, Adora had bothered her enough. It was demoralizing, having to ask Catra for so much - she couldn’t think of the last day that they did anything for Catra. It was all always about Adora. Her injury, her scars, her healing. 

Catra never complained, but Adora was worried about how long she would put up with it. 

This was something she had to do, if she could make this work, then she could start to do more on her own. 

Moving still hurt, it wasn’t as bad as it had been. Her breath didn’t catch in her throat every time she tweaked her back a little, but at this point she was pretty sure she’d feel the burns on her skin forever. 

Adora rolled to her side, legs slowly moving off the bed. 

Why was this so scary? It was just getting out of bed. It didn’t make sense how little control she seemed to have over her own body. She was still strong, her muscles hadn’t left. It was just that her limbs wouldn’t do what her brain asked them to do. 

The pain didn’t help, and when she pushed up off her elbow to try and sit, it hurt again. This one was sharper, more pointed and jagged, like a knife digging into her skin. She bit her bottom lip, hard, and held back a cry. 

She lifted her legs as much as she could before forcing them down, using the momentum of her entire body to sit up. 

Her breathing was already ragged when she finally sat up. It probably didn’t help that she’d pushed for more work in the pool tonight. Catra had warned her about overworking, so did that stupid healer guy who kept telling her to ‘harness her frustrations’. 

Taking a deep breath, Adora readied herself for the next move; standing up. Again, she’d done this a bajillion times before and again, it was now terrifying. 

Leaning forward, Adora put her hands and her knees and pushed up. She lifted off the bed just a little, but when she tried to straighten her back, it tensed and burned. She felt her breath catch, like something in her lungs clamped shut. 

The logical part of her brain screamed at her to lie back down, but she pushed that away. If she could get through the pain, she was almost on her feet. She struggled and used an arm to grab onto one of the beds posts, using it for balance. She pulled herself up, willed herself to stand and when she made it, Adora felt her lungs open back up and took a breath. 

She was sweating. Just from getting up off of the bed, she was sweating and exhausted. 

The realization of how hard that was broke her heart. How could she ever possibly be She-ra again? Or even a normal version of Adora. 

Standing upright, the bathroom seemed hundreds of miles away. Her back was on fire, her body ached and now she was crying. 

She was scared and in pain, so she did the only thing she could think to do.

“C - Catra…” She called, her voice trembling. 

The sheets rustled behind her, Adora really hoped it was enough because she didn’t think she’d be able to call out to her again without sobbing. 

“Hmmm, Adora what…” She couldn’t turn around to look, but she heard the moment Catra realized Adora wasn’t in bed. “Adora!” Catra was moving, so fast Adora would be jealous if she wasn’t so relieved. Catra was there, standing in front of her, hands on Adora’s shoulders - blissfully helping hold her weight. “What the hell are you…” Catra looked into her eyes and her panic wilted into sadness. “Oh Adora,” Catra hugged her and Adora let go. She fell into Catra’s arms and let Catra guide her back to the bed. 

Her body thanked her when she was sitting again but she broke down. She cried, hard and loud - if there  _ were _ guards they definitely heard her. 

Adora didn’t care, she was so scared. Scared that this was going to be her life now. Dependent and imprisoned in her own body. She wanted her freedom back, she wanted to scoop Catra into her arms again and twirl her around. She wanted to play in the pool with Bow and go on those stupid long hikes with Glimmer where they’d end up lost in the middle of the woods, only so Glimmer could teleport them back. 

Catra never let go, just held her tight, stroked her hair and let her cry. 

The crying, on top of the failed attempt to get out of bed on her own, exhausted Adora. The problem was, when she did finally settle down a little, she still had to go to the bathroom. 

Catra, who was still holding her, was clearly waiting for Adora to say anything. “I...I had to pee.” 

Sighing, Catra pressed her forehead into Adora’s and nodded. “You know better, Adora. You know I don’t mind you waking me up.” 

“I mind,” Adora said, kinda wishing she hadn’t. “You...you said you were tired.” 

For some reason, when Catra glared at her, it made Adora feel better. “So? I’m tired, I’ll sleep in tomorrow. But this, you...you have to wake me up for this.” 

“But…”

“No, no buts. You want to start trying to do more on your own? That’s fine - we’ll work on that. But do not shut me out. Do not do it without me there to help, okay? I know how your brain works. I know you think you’re being a burden and I know you’re frustrated, but stop assuming I don’t want to help you. I do. I…” Catra reeled herself in, trying to calm down. “I love you, you dumbass. In case you haven’t figured it out yet, that means I  _ want _ to help. When you let me help. When you talk to me and tell me what you want - that means the world me, Adora. That means you trust me, which is something I’ve been working for every day, for years now.” Now Catra was crying, and somehow that was the worst thing Adora had been through tonight. “After everything I did…”

“Catra,” 

She was stopped when Catra held a hand up to silence her. “I’m not digging into old wounds, I’m just saying; it took me a long time to feel like I’d earned the right to be with you. To have this new life and all these great things. To...love you,” Adora could tell how hard all of this was for Catra to say. A few years earlier, she never would have. “So trust me when I tell you that you letting me help is all I could ever ask for.” 

Adora had no answer for that. She wasn't sure when Catra had gotten so good with words and speeches, but Adora’s heart was in her throat. She nodded dumbly, it was all she could do and felt Catra brush a tear from her cheek. 

“I - I still really have to pee.” 

“Well,” Catra stood up and got into position for Adora to grab onto her. “Good thing we’ve got practice with this.” 

* * *

Days continued to pass in Mystacor - slowly but surely, Adora continued to improve. She doubled her time with the healers, letting them use their magic and meditations to sooth the burns on her back. 

They still hurt like hell, but her movement wasn’t as stiff and painful. It wasn't anything to get too excited about, but she could sit herself up in bed now while only looking slightly ridiculous. She still couldn’t walk, at least not outside of the pool, and that sucked 

But the improvement was hard to deny and Catra made sure Adora never ignored it. 

Catra, who Adora was starting to realize had a natural caretaker instinct in her that Adora could have never imagined. Catra was steady and consistent, even when it was something she didn’t want to do, like swimming or meditating, she just...did it anyway. Adora could tell she hated some of it, she could tell that Catra was fighting an internal battle not to complain, but to anyone else, Catra seemed happy to be there. 

It was during a particularly grueling pool session, where Adora’s therapists were telling her to squat in the water and push up with her legs to stand, that she realized how much she loved Catra. 

The squats were scary, Adora had lost a lot of trust in her legs to do what she wanted them to do. The idea of putting her head underwater, then not being able to come back up was terrifying. 

Enter Catra, who was always there and always ready to help. Catra, who  _ suggested _ that she could do the squats with her, be there to make sure she didn’t drown. 

It was during that session, when their eyes met underwater during Adora’s first squat attempt, that Adora realized she wanted to do that big cheesy ceremony thing Bow and Glimmer would always tell her about in their favorite stories. 

There was a word for it that she couldn’t remember, but it meant ‘forever’ and that was what Adora wanted. Maybe not right now, but someday, 

Right now, she just wanted - needed - to do something special for Catra. 

Of course, doing something for someone that was pretty much at your side all day every day was  _ hard _ . Adora just needed a little time away from Catra to plan it, but doing that meant finding a way to Catra to go literally anywhere else for like twenty minutes. 

It wasn’t a great plan, okay, it was a terrible plan. But it was still a plan and even if most of Adora’s plans were a little reckless, they usually worked. 

Breakfast was a big deal in Mystacor, in fact, every meal was a big deal here. Adora didn’t mind The food was always good and the kitchen had stupid tall celings and windows with little panes of glass that changed color, making the room have a different feel each time. 

The main table was big and square, with a cooking station literally inside of it. There were chefs working all the time, they all seemed happy to be there. Conversation was lively and people laughed. It was nice.

Sadly, Adora would have to ruin that for Catra, just for a second and for a really good reason. 

They were maybe halfway through their first round runny egg when Adora decided now was the best time. She reached out to grab a drink of her juice, and as she pulled her hand back, she let her elbow go limp and smash into the corner of the table on purpose. Of course, she was a little too excited and hit it  _ really _ hard, making her whole forearm go numb as pain shot through it. 

The cup of juice she had slipped and fell right where she wanted it to, only  _ way _ more liquid came out of it than intended. 

Catra squeaked, that cute noise she made when something surprised her. She flew back in her chair, her shirt and paints dripping with orange juice.

“Oh no!” Adora cried. Netossa was crazy, she could totally act. “Catra, I’m  _ so _ sorry.”

With a sigh, Catra looked at her shirt, now stained and then back to Adora. “It’s fine, I - I’ll just go change. Don’t eat my eggs.” Catra pointed a finger at her and Adora smiled. 

“I would never.”

“You absolutely would.” Catra was dead serious as she turned and left to clean up. 

Adora watched her go, waited for her to leave the dining room completely. When the door closed behind her, Adora pounced. 

“Castaspella!” She shouted across the table, a bit too loudly. Loud enough that Castaspella jumped and nearly covered  _ herself _ in juice. 

“Adora! Is everything okay?” 

‘Yes, I just don’t have a lot of time. I want to do something nice for Catra!” 

Castaspella tilted her head to the side in confusion. “Such as?” 

“I don’t know!” Adora threw her hands in the air. “What’s something...you know...romantic that we could do here?” 

“Oh!” Casta’s eyes lit up. “The hot springs are a wonderful place to spend time with someone you -” 

“Catra hates the water.” Adora said, watching Castaspella’s face fall. 

“She’s with you in the water every day.”

_ Cause she’s amazing _ .

Adora had to reel in those thoughts, there was no time to daydream. “Exactly, and she hates it. Anything else? Something preferably dry and with food. She loves the fish you make here, I want to make her fish and do it romantically.”

“You want to make the fish?”

Oh, no...that was a bad idea. “Well, I want your amazing cooks to make it,” Adora gave a broad smile to the man currently working in the center of the table. He smiled back. “I just need somewhere romantic and secluded for like...a date.” Yep, still weird to think she got to go on dates with Catra. Even after all these years.

“I’ve got it!” Castaspella literally stood up in her chair. “We’ve just added a wonderful observation deck on the east side of the castle. You can see the stars in the sky, watch the sunset. It’s usually quite busy in the evenings but I believe we could give the two of you a night alone out there.” 

“Yes! That’s perfect. Thank you so much.” Adora was really starting to love Aunt Casta. “Tonight then, I’d love to have some of the fish you made us two nights ago?” Adora directed to the chef, who nodded. 

“Consider it done,” he said, earning a smile. 

“Great! We’d only need it for a few hours, but I need to keep Catra distracted for a bit so I can set everything up. I wanna surprise her.”

“You...you want me to distract Catra? Adora, I have not seen that girl leave your side the entire time you’ve been here.” That was true, Catra had been with her the whole time. Adora didn’t mind, at all, she just needed a little time now to make this thing work. “Plus, I don’t think she likes me.” 

“No,” Adora shook her head. “She’s just...like that with people. You’re fine. I just need something. I need…” then it hit her. “Glimmer!” Adora reached into the bag she had hooked to the side of her chair and pulled out her little tablet Bow (with plenty of help from Entrapta) had made for all of them. “Quick, don’t let Catra in here if she comes!” 

Castaspella stood up again. “Guards, lock the door until I say otherwise.”

She pressed the buttons, trying to remember how the heck to use this thing. They all had them, but didn't use them as much as they probably should. Adora was pretty sure Catra’s was stuffed in their closet back in Bright Moon. Still, Bow always had his and Adora quickly pressed his contact button. 

The screen was fuzzy for a moment, like snow then clicked and hissed before suddenly flashing Bow’s face in front of her. 

“Adora!” He beamed, “Glimmer! It’s Adora!” 

There was no time for this. “I have to be fast, Bow. I’m sorry. But I need Glimmer’s help.”

“I’m here, what’s up Adora?” Glimmer was suddenly there, her hair wet and she was wrapped in a towel. 

“Tonight, right before the sun starts to set, I need you to teleport here and grab Catra.” 

Suddenly, there was a knock on the big door that led to the dining room. 

_ Catra.  _

“What? Why?” 

“I want to do something really special for her but I don’t know how to get her away for long enough for me to set it up. So just...blink over here, grab her and blink back. Then give me ten minutes and bring her back.” 

“Adora, if I take her away from you like that she might actually kill me.” 

Adora scoffed, even though that was maybe a tiny bit true. “You can handle it, just tell her you need her help with something.”

“But...I don’t.” 

“Hey! Let me in!” Catra screamed through the door. 

That door was going to come down if Adora didn’t wrap this up.

“Glimmer, please, just make something up, let her yell at you. I promise it will be worth it.”

“Worth it for who?!” Glimmer sighed and Adora knew she’d won. “Fine, I’ll be there. Just...keep her in the guest room. I flash in, grab her and you’ll have ten minutes.”

“Thank you! I love you both!” With that, Adora ended the call, tucked the tablet back in her bag and Castaspella gave the okay to drop the barrier on the door. 

As soon as it fell, it flew open. Everyone jumped and Adora looked back to see that Catra had  _ kicked  _ it open

“What the hell was that?!” Catra shouted, she was panting a bit from hammering on the door. Not to mention she looked  _ amazing _ in a white button down shirt - sleeves rolled up. Looking a little irritated and...hot 

_ Wow. _

“My apologies,” Castaspella said, a laugh in her throat. “Magic can be finicky sometimes.” 

Catra glared at, well everyone, but when she looked at Adora, all Adora could do was shrug and wave her over. Catra took a few hesitant steps back to the table, Adora knew she was thrown off a bit, but it would all make sense tonight. 

This had to be perfect. Catra deserved it. 

* * *

“Glimmer what the fu-”

That was the last thing Adora heard from Catra when Glimmer popped in and stole her. Glimmer couldn’t have timed it any worse because Catra had just taken a shower and had not actually finished getting dressed and now she was somewhere in Selineas without pants and oh boy she was going to destroy that kingdom again. 

It didn’t matter, Adora knew she could make it up to her, she just had to get to work. Once Catra was gone, Adora grabbed a random boat paddle that was used as some kind of decoration in their room and used it to, well, paddle her wheelchair across the floor and out of the room. 

She was still strong enough to push herself, her hands clutching any wall she could find for momentum as she used the paddle to push off the floor. It was actually working quite well and when she made her way to Castaspella’s main resting area, Adora was bursting at the seams. 

“We have like seven minutes!” She screamed and Castaspella jumped into action. 

She, along with a few of her guards, helped Adora make her way to the observation room thing. 

When they arrived, Adora was blown away. It was so incredible. It had a tall, rounded ceiling made of glass that almost magnified the stars. In the center was a massive waterfall that seemed to come from absolutely nowhere. It ran down into a large, circular pool that was dancing with magic.

Adora was in awe, clutching onto her stupid little paddle as Castaspella wheeled her over to where there was a blanket and a basket of food waiting. 

“This is amazing, I could die happy here.”

Castaspella slowed her pushing for a second. “Please, don’t die here - it would really ruin the appeal of the observation deck.” Adora ignored her and kept looking up at the sky. She loved the stars so much, she missed them - missed their trips to space. When this was over, she wanted to go back. She wanted to chart the stars again and lose her nights sitting next to Catra staring out the window at nothing but those stars. 

Catra...crap...Catra.

“Okay,” she snapped herself back to reality. “I uh...I think this is good. Just...please don’t let anyone come in here tonight. I promise we won’t break anything.” 

“We’ll have one guard posted outside the door to make sure no one comes in. Please don’t drink from the fountain, it’s magical and will make you sick.” 

Adora had no intention of drinking from the fountain, but she still felt a sting of disappointment when Castaspella told her she couldn’t. She really did hate being told no. 

“Of course,” she said, ignoring how suddenly clear and enticing the fountain water was. “Catra will teleport back in my room so when she comes out she’ll be...angry, just...send her here. Don’t tell her anything, please.” 

“Oh young love! This is so exciting!” Casta clapped her hands and was practically bouncing on her toes. “She’ll be back any moment now, we’ll leave you to...is the oar from my father’s boat?” 

_ Oh no _

“I uh...it still works great!” She said, holding out towards Casta who quickly tore it away from her. “Sorry,” Adora did feel bad, she wasn’t thinking. Of course she’d grab the one thing in that room full of junk that actually had sentimental value. 

“It doesn’t seem to be any worse for wear. Very well,” Casta began directing her guards out of the room. “Enjoy your evening, Adora. We’ll send Catra your way as soon as she returns.”

“Thank you so much,” Adora would never not be amazed at how wonderful her crazy little extended family was. She felt bad. They’d all done so much for her and they’d let her come here to train and there really wasn't anything she could do in return. 

_ Not yet _ . She thought, but when she was better and they needed her, she’d do anything she could to make up for all of this. 

For being such a burden. 

That’s what tonight was about. She owed Catra this, for putting her through so much the last few days. She couldn’t live with this guilt of being such a bother - it had to even out. She wanted tonight to be perfect. She knew the food would be good, she could practically smell it. 

Rolling over as best she could, Adora eyed the basket resting atop a white and blue blanket, she swore there was magic in the food making it smell so good. 

She wanted to peek inside, but that was when another realization hit her. She was still in the chair. She didn’t want to be. When Catra came back, Adora wanted to be on the blanket waiting for her. That was how Adora pictured it. She’d be lying here, big smile on her face, plates ready made - Catra would be angry but she’d see this and see Adora and everything would be okay. 

But Adora didn’t want Catra to see her in the chair. She didn’t want Catra to come in and have to help her get down - she...she could do that. She was moving much better. In a few days she wouldn’t even need the chair. 

Taking a breath, Adora locked the brakes on her chair and unlatched the stupid little seat belt. She scooted herself out to the edge, readying her legs to catch her. Leaning forward, the momentum was faster than she expected, and when her feet planted in the ground it was...a lot. 

Still, they held together fairly well, she didn’t fall over completely, just sort of slowly started to crash to the ground. 

Her hands reached out to catch her, when they did, her back cried in pain from the jostle. Adora bit her lip, hard, she didn’t want to scream and have the guard at the door come in thinking she’d drank the fountain water or anything. 

Adora stayed that way for a moment. On her hands and knees, trying to catch her breath and make her back stop screaming. It hurt so much, she wondered if that pain would ever go away completely. 

As She-ra, Adora felt pain, but never like this. It never stayed for so long, she wasn’t used to it. Every day, no matter how much easier it was for her to move and function, the pain was always there. 

Maybe one day she’d just adjust to it - accept it. Though that idea was scarier than she’d care to admit. 

Eventually, Adora managed to push up just enough to lay on her back. Now all she had to do was sit up. She took a moment to enjoy the view though. The stars above her, this place was amazing. Another reason to visit Mystacor under better circumstances. 

Her and Catra needed something like this in Bright Moon. 

“Okay, time to get up, you can’t have Catra finding you like…”

“Adora!” Catra’s voice echoed off the walls as the main door opened. Her feet slapping the ground with every stomp she made. “What. The. Hell?!” 

Still on her back, Adora looked over at Catra from her back - only to be met with the most angry, confused and concerned expression she’d ever seen. 

“H - Hey Catra.”


	6. Chapter 6

“-ck!’ 

Suddenly, the true definition of the word ‘suddenly’, Catra was standing in a guest room in Selineas. 

Bow was there, looking like a doofus with a big smile on his face and Glimmer still had both hands on Catra’s shoulders. 

She also still really really hated teleporting. 

“Will you calm down,” Glimmer laughed. “You’re so dramat - oh.” Glimmer’s eyes trailed down Catra’s legs and she covered her mouth. “I’m so sorry,” she clearly wasn’t because she was trying not to laugh. 

“Oh no!’ Bow screamed, turning away so fast he almost fell over. 

Catra was ready to kill. “Glimmer, what in the hell is happening? Why am I in Selineas right now, without  _ pants _ ?” 

“Because your girlfriend is a sap who wants to do something nice for you, but she can’t set up anything because you’re there with her, so she asked me to help.”

“By teleporting me randomly and leaving me pantsless in another part of Etheria.”

Glimmer shrugged. “The pants thing wasn’t part of the plan but kinda...yeah?” 

“So, here...” Bow was slowly backing up to them, something brown in his hands. “Here’s a pair of pants I found in the drawer. I think they’re Sea Hawks. They might fit.”

Catra reached out and snatched the pants from Bow, he jumped in surprise when she did. 

“You three are going to be the death of me.” Catra eyed the brown pants like they were her greatest villain. “Are these Sea Hawk’s favorite pants?” 

Bow tilted his head to the side. “Um...I don’t know. Why?”

Instead of answering, Catra extended one claw and cut a hole just below the waistband for her tail.. “I swear, of all the ridiculous…” That was when Catra’s mind clicked. “Wait...Adora’s doing something for me?”

Glimmer rolled her eyes, Catra wanted to restart the war at that moment. “Yes, you dummy. You know Adora. I’m sure she feels guilty that you’ve been doing all this stuff for her, so she thinks she has to make up for it.” 

All of Catra’s vitriol died away. She sighed, buttoning up Sea Hawk’s pants (which were somehow tight even on her. How did he wear these things?) before she found a chair to sit in. 

“Sounds like Adora,” she said. “She’d better not be pushing herself too much.” Catra saw Bow still facing the wall. “I’m wearing pants now, Arrow Boy, you can turn around.” 

He did, slowly. “Hey, Catra,” he waved. Dork. 

“How’s Adora been?” Glimmer asked, Catra highly doubted this was what Adora had in mind for her distraction. 

She shrugged, unsure of how to answer. “Physically, she’s getting better. Not nearly as fast as she wants to but she’s been spoiled with She-ra powers for too long and forgot how normal people get better.” Catra leaned back and took a deep breath. “Everything else? Not as good. She’s sad more than she used to be.”

That was hard to admit out loud, and not something she thought she’d have the courage to tell Adora. But it was easy to notice how often Catra would find Adora just staring at nothing with a frown on her face. 

She knew her lack of mobility played a big part in it, but it was more than that. Adora was a hero, in every sense of the word. Helping people, doing her job and being valued mattered to her. 

Adora would never be comfortable just being normal. She had to do more. Shadow Weaver had gone out of her way to burrow thoughts deep in Adora’s mind that if she didn’t do everything she could for other people, then she didn’t wasn’t worth their time. 

Even if that meant giving up her own life for them - a trauma that Catra herself had pulled Adora out of more than once. 

So no matter how much Catra might want Adora to herself, she wasn’t allowed to have that. She had to share her with She-ra and with Adora’s duty to be the hero. It was hard, more often than not Catra restented it. But it mattered to Adora and that was enough. 

She’d spend the rest of her life cleaning up Adora’s scars if it meant she could spend the rest of her life with Adora. 

“I’m sure she’ll be better once her legs are better. Once she can walk and run and start training again and all that.” Glimmer was an optimist, Catra used to hate it when they first became friends. 

Now though, she clung to Glimmer’s hope. She needed it. “Maybe,” she wanted to believe that. “But Adora still doesn’t feel her connection to She-ra...at all. I know she’s tried, I hear her mumbling Grayskull nonsense in the shower.” Catra still wanted to know if She-ra would be naked if Adora transformed in the shower. She hadn’t built up the nerve to ask yet. “Have you heard anything about what happened in Tiptree?”

When Glimmer’s expression tensed a bit, Catra knew they had something. “The villagers say that the people who we fought just kinda...showed up last year. They were trying to find something. They would hire people, trackers, to look for some kind of First One’s ruin. Apparently they had a part of it with...markings on it, and were trying to translate it - but…”

“Only Adora can read First One’s writing.”

“This is just a theory,” Bow spoke up, grabbing Catra’s attention. “But I think that what happened to Adora wasn’t their magic. I think...it was She-ra.” 

Catra frowned. “You think She-ra blew up?” 

“Self-destruct. Or a last ditch effort to protect herself.” Bow ran a hand over his barely there beard. “Maybe the magic was trying to absorb knowledge from She-ra, or steal her power. Maybe they just wanted to strip She-ra from Adora and take her to do their bidding.” 

Catra was so ready to be done with all of this magical crap. People just needed to leave Adora alone forever. “So you guys have this...text thing?” 

“Perfuma has it,” Glimmer said. “We - I told her to hold onto it, keep it safe. Until Adora was better.” 

She wouldn’t say it, but Catra was grateful. “Good, I - I think we should maybe not tell her just yet. Not...not until she’s better.”

“Agreed,” Glimmer nodded. Catra wanted to hug her. “I’m sure she’s pushing herself hard enough without this hanging over her.” Pushing herself off the bed, Glimmer walked over to Catra. “I should probably get you back, don’t wanna keep Adora waiting.”

_ Oh right...the surprise. _

In all the revalation, Catra forgot her girlfriend was halfway across Etheria trying to be romantic. “We’ll call you guys tomorrow. I’m sure Adora will want to gloat about all this.” Catra looked at Bow, her hands on the button of Sea Hawk’s pants. “You want these back?” 

He threw his hands over his face. “You keep them!” 

Catra grinned, they weren’t half bad. She refocused on Glimmer. “I hate this part.” 

“I know,” Glimmer laughed.

* * *

“H - Hey, Catra.” 

It was shocking, downright embarrassing, how fast Catra’s anger could go away. Seeing Adora, barely holding herself upright on the floor, was all it took for Catra to forget that she’d just been in Selineas for ten minutes, without pants. 

She stalked over, not angry, but also not ready to let Adora off the hook. “You want to tell me what’s going on? Why are you on the floor?”

Adora laughed nervously. “Oh...well, I fell a little.” Catra sighed. “But I’m fine! No pain or anything. It wasn’t really a fall, more like a poorly planned tumble and I landed on the blanket, Look how soft this blanket is?” To prove her point, Adora rubbed her hand on the blue, velvety material. 

“Adora, what is this?” Catra asked as she sat down, her new pants suddenly even stiffer. Seriously, how did Sea Hawk do anything in these?

The smile on Adora’s face fell a bit, but she didn’t look sad, just thoughtful. Her brows furrowed a bit, her eyes narrowed and she looked absurdly cute. 

“I...I didn’t really have time to come up with a plan. I just wanted to do something nice for you. Because you’ve been doing so much for me lately and I -”

“Felt guilty?” Catra knew it was true, even if Adora wasn’t ready to admit it. 

“No,” her voice gave her away. “Maybe...it’s been a lot.” 

Catra nodded. “It has, but I’m not here against my will.” 

“I know,” Adora frowned, Catra resisted the desire to reach out, touch her, and bring her smile back. Adora needed to get through this and Catra knew it. “I always pictured us coming here, taking a break from all the travel and space missions and diplomat meetings that you’re scarily good at.” Catra couldn’t stop herself from smirking. She was very good at intimidating snobby rich people. “I wanted us to have some memories here that weren’t in the training grounds or the pool, that I know you hate,” Adora held up a finger to quickly stop any protest. Catra conceded. “A night that wasn’t me breaking down and crying in your arms.” 

Taking a deep breath, Catra closed the distance between them and let herself sit on the super soft blanket. She was gentle with Adora, more now than before, as she wrapped her tail around Adora’s waist and put a hand on her knee. “I agree,” Catra looked into Adora’s eyes. “I want us to have nights like this too. This is...really cool, Adora. I mean it. The tactics to get it done, not so much - but it’s very thoughtful.”

_ More than I deserve.  _

Catra often wondered if those thoughts would ever fully go away. She doubted it. Too many bad choices and worse memories. Mostly, she’d just learned to live with them. 

“That being said,” She firmed up her tone a little. “The rest of this stuff...it’s pretty special to me too.” 

Adora shook her head. “I’ve had you in the pool for two weeks straight.” 

“And it’s  _ sucked _ ,” Catra laughed. “But Adora these are things I  _ never _ thought I’d have.” Catra really really wanted to stop having these heavy conversations. She did. And she knew with everything she’d talked about with Bow and Glimmer, that more of them were coming. If she could just get through this one, she promised to spend the rest of the night smiling. “I have been in love with you since before I even knew what that meant.” It was strange to say it out loud. It was shocking when she realized it - sitting at Prime’s unnecessary dining room table in a war ship floating through space. Watching Adora run, scared and desperate - her life threatened. Not by Catra, not in a situation that she could control. “We were so messed up by the Horde that I had no idea how to handle it. If anything, I was led to believe my feelings for you were a bad thing. That they were wrong and…” The tears sparked behind her eyes and Catra hated it. She wasn’t supposed to do this. Adora was smiling at her, watery eyes of her own, but a smile nonetheless. “I did everything I could to keep myself away from you. To the point that I convinced myself I hated you. But now, now you’re -” 

“I love you, too.” Adora said softly, but clearly leaving room for Catra to continue. 

“So all of this, being here with you and taking care of you. It’s not a burden or a problem or anything I consider unfair. Adora, it’s a gift.” Okay, maybe she was the one reading too many of Mermista’s books. “Like...after everything I did. All the people I hurt, including you.  _ Especially _ you. I got a second chance. I get to be the one here with you. Helping you, holding you when you cry. Scrambling around after you in that awful swimming pool. Dealing with your obnoxious friends.” Adora laughed, complete with snort and everything. Catra melted. “You don’t owe me anything, Adora. You gave me everything.” 

Adora exhaled slowly, Catra’s words setting between them. Catra had no idea where that all came from. She was maybe a little proud of herself for such a speech. Though she did once command an army - she knew how to work her words. 

“Wow,” the way Adora was looking at her, Catra wanted to capture that feeling in a bottle and keep it forever. “You’re kind of amazing.” 

Catra shrugged. “Well, I am dating She-ra.” 

Adora’s eyebrows went up. “Oh? That’s impressive.”

“I don’t like to brag.” 

“Yes you do.”

“Maybe a little,” Catra leaned in, her nose an inch from Adora’s. “She’s a bit of an idiot though.”

Adora smirked. “Well she’d have to be to put up with you.” 

“You’re insufferable.” Catra’s voice was thick, husky, her throat tight as Adora filled every one of her senses. “Be honest with me. How good does your back feel?” Catra knew the question might ruin the mood, and it certainly made Adora falter, but she answered. 

“A little sore, better than it was a week ago. Why?” 

Catra leaned forward, her lips pressed against Adora’s ear. “Because I want to lay you down on this blanket and  _ ruin _ it.” 

When she leaned back, Adora’s blue eyes had darkened. Catra knew the food would have to wait.

She closed the distance between them, kissing Adora hungrily, her hands gently finding their place on Adora’s jaw. 

“Mmm,” Adora pulled back, or tried to. Catra had her bottom lip between her teeth. “Guard,” She mumbled, her face flushed red. “There’s a guard at the door.” 

Catra shook her head, drawing out that cute little confused face she loved so much. “I chased him away when I came back.” 

Adora initiated their next kiss. 

* * *

Adora was right, this blanket  _ was _ soft. 

Everything had happened so fast when Catra came back, she didn’t even have the time to really take in how incredible this observation room was. The stars in the sky, the way the magic on the windows made them seem closer than they were. Even the waterfall, which Catra usually hated, had a certain charm to it - it’s sound filling the background of their night together. 

Catra found herself on her back, wrapped up in a blanket with Adora curled up around her. They were careful, Catra gave everything she could to Adora without straining her or hurting her. 

The night had been, no pun intended, magical. 

Now, they found themselves tangled up in one another, looking up at the stars. Adora’s head on Catra’s chest, their hands locked together somewhere under the blanket. 

Nights like tonight were almost overwhelming for Catra. She spent so much time ignoring how she felt, turning her back on love and Adora and everything she wanted but would never allow herself to have - that having it now was almost too much. 

To be able to lay here and hold Adora in her arms - it was bringing out the most obnoxious side of her. A side that wanted to scream at strangers on the street and tell them how in love she was. The side that wanted to write cheesy songs and sing them as loud as she could in the shower about this girl she knew who loved her. 

It made her a sappy, soft, mess of goo that would gladly give up the rest of Etheria if it meant she could just lay here like this forever. 

Catra wasn’t about to burst into song or talk to anyone she didn’t absolutely have to, so instead, she chose a subtler way to express how she was feeling. 

“You’re heavy.”

Adora laughed against her, the vibration soothing Catra’s already subdued body. “It’s about time you hold me instead of me carrying you around all the time.” 

Catra rolled her eyes. “To be fair, it’s usually She-ra doing the carrying.”

“One in the same.” 

“You say that until you break something as She-ra because your stupid shoulders are too big or you’re too tall. Then suddenly it’s two separate entities and you have no responsibility.” 

Adora groaned. “You’ll never let me live that down, will you?”

“Absolutely not. First day visiting the Aguilan village and you walk into the  _ first _ home and smash your head through their ceiling.” Catra started laughing before she even finished the story. Adora apologized so much, even though the people in the village could have cared less. If anything, they had a story to tell for generations. When the mighty She-ra bashed her head into their roof. 

“Alright,” Adora shook her head. “Shut up and look at the stars with me.” 

“That’s all we’ve been doing for the last ten minutes. I had you seeing stars, then you wanted to see the stars.”

“You’re the worst,” Adora smacked her a little for good measure. “Do you see the axe,” Adora asked and Catra found herself lost again. 

“What is it with you and axes in the stars?” 

“Shut up and look with me.” She watched as Adora’s hand lifted up and pointed at the sky. She tried to follow it. “That’s the hilt, it’s a little off, but...it would still work.” She then swooped her finger across the stars, Catra struggling to keep track of it. “Then the blade, it’s almost perfect.”

Catra didn’t see the axe, not really, but she wasn’t about to take this away. “You miss it, huh? The stars?” 

Adora brought her hand down, resting it in the fur of Catra’s chest. “Yeah. I know there’s a lot to do here and...especially now with...everything.” Catra had almost forgotten where they were, why they were here. Almost. “I hope…I hope we can go back up there someday...someday soon.” 

“We will,” Catra grabbed Adora’s hand in her fur, bringing it to her lips to kiss it. Gods help her, she was a mess tonight. “We get through this, we figure out what happened in Tiptree. Then we’ll go back. We’ll go anywhere you want.”

Adora squeezed her hand, which was more than enough of a response. They were silent for a while after that. Just enjoying the sky and the quiet and the warmth they shared.

Catra hadn’t had a lot of perfect moments in her life, in fact, there were only a few. This one though, this was definitely one of them. 

And like all the other ones she’d had before, Adora was always a part of it. 

Right as Catra thought she might just fall asleep right here, Adora in her arms under the stars - she remembered something very important. 

“Adora?” 

“Hmm?” 

“Was their fish in your little basket of food?” 

Adora nodded. “And something called ‘fries’. I asked the chef to - Catra!” Adora squeaked when she was suddenly being moved and Catra was out of the blanket and pulling the basket down from the fountain’s edge where they’d sat it. “Wow, I see where your priorities are?”

Catra gave her a bright smile, the smell of fish filling the air around her. 

Perfect night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not the most eventful chapter, but I figured the girls deserved a nice night. Plus it moved my shaky little plot forward a bit lol. 
> 
> I haven't settled on an exact number of chapters for this story yet, but I'd guess somewhere between 15-18. 
> 
> Thank you SO much for reading and for all your wonderful feedback, it still kinda blows me away how much you guys are enjoying this. Means a lot. I do apologize for not responding to comments, I just don't really know what to say other than thank you lol. If you have a question, of course I'll answer, but just know I read every single one and they absolutely make my day.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for the reviews and feedback so far. It means so much, and I hope I can keep giving you good stuff to read. Plenty more to come

“For the honor...of Grayskull!” 

Nothing. 

Adora stood in a field, just outside of the main grounds of Mystacor. No chair, no one needed to push her around. She could stand on her own two feet again, even if the fairly short walk out here had her breathing heavy. 

It wouldn’t be an issue if she could just transform. She was  _ so _ tired of not being able to transform. She thought about transforming so much she was getting tired of the  _ word _ transform.

This was the worst recurring theme of her life. Ever since she found the sword this had been an issue. Her connection to She-ra was shakier than Mermista and Sea Hawk’s relationship and it was infuriating. 

The previous times, when Adora was severed from She-ra, there was still  _ something _ . Still a spark or a pressure inside of her - that tug of power that told her it was still there. 

This time though, there was nothing. Her body felt empty, when she reached her hand out to bring forward her sword, it almost felt like she’d never actually done it at all. 

She was so tired. Tired of struggling and training and the stupid swimming pools here. She wanted to go home, but they’d promised Castaspella they would stay for her ball tonight. 

After she let them stay here and gave them both so much support through all this, it was the least they could do. 

Now that Adora had found her footing, literally, and didn’t need Catra for pretty much everything, Catra had finally started to enjoy herself in Mystacor. 

Adora felt guilty, she knew what Catra said, and she believed her, but it was nice to see Catra able to do some things for herself. 

Today, Catra was at one of the lakes surrounding the grounds, learning how to catch fish. This afternoon, she’d learn how to cook them. Catra had asked Adora if she wanted to go, but Adora really didn’t feel up to the hike. Not to mention they’d spent the last few weeks constantly in each other’s company. It was probably good for them to spend a little time apart. 

Still, being alone wasn’t the best thing for Adora these days, or any day really. She was running out of patience with herself. Her mind and body were refusing to cooperate and while she knew she wasn’t at full strength yet, far from where she’d been just weeks before - she was  _ tired  _ of not doing anything useful. 

When it was clear that she was  _ not _ going to be able to summon She-ra today, Adora shifted her focus to the next best thing she could think of. 

Training. 

While it wasn’t nearly as rigorous as her training had been just a few weeks earlier, Adora was thrilled to be able to do some of the things she used to. 

She wanted to push herself as much as she could. She wanted to tear her body down so it would build itself back up stronger. She hated feeling weak. If this incident had taught Adora anything, it was that she could not take her body for granted. She couldn’t rely on She-ra to always be there to save her. She had to train harder, faster and stronger. 

Of course, it was all good in theory, but for now, her body would only allow her to do so much. 

Which was why after about four pushups, Adora’s back started to burn and her arms started to shake and she lost her balance.

It was somewhere between picking grass out of her teeth and trying to salvage her pride, that Castaspella popped up behind her. 

“Adora, dear, are you okay?” 

A strike of pain surged down her back as she rolled over and sat up. She held her ground, not letting her face show any discomfort, instead smiling and hoping it didn’t look as forced as it was. “I’m fine, testing to see how many pushups I could do.”

“Oh I see,” Casta took a seat on a nearby bench. “How far did you get?” 

Adora frowned. “Only four.” She wanted to stand, it felt oddly rude to be sitting like this in the grass, but she didn’t trust her back just yet. “Not really what I’m used to.” 

Casta hummed. “Still a far cry from the shape you were in when you arrived.” 

“Yeah,” she knew Castaspella was right. She knew Catra was right. But that didn’t make it any less frustrating. She wasn’t used to this, to pain like this holding on for so long. It made her feel useless - to everyone. Adora wanted to be a pillar for others to hold onto. That’s what she was good at, standing firm in the face of anything while everyone around her stood behind, safe and protected. 

Four pushups wouldn’t protect anyone, and she knew that thought wasn’t fair. She knew it. She just wished all this could go faster. She wanted the pain to go away. 

“You and Catra must be excited for the ball tonight?” 

Adora nodded, though excited wasn’t a word she would use for Catra. “Definitely, though I don’t see myself doing much dancing.” 

Casta laughed. “Oh, I love dancing, but there will be plenty to do otherwise. Good food and good company. We put on shows with our magic and fireworks to end the night. These events are always fun.” Casta looked around a bit. “Speaking of, where is your other half?” 

This time when Adora smiled, it was her most genuine. “Fishing,” she couldn’t stop herself from laughing. “She’s been eating well during our stay here. She loves your chef’s fish and she wanted to learn how to make her own.” 

“Ah yes, Fisher knows his way around the kitchen. I have to say, Adora. That one...she surprises me.”

“Catra?” 

Castaspella nodded. “When she first came back with you from Horde Prime’s ship, after all I’d heard from Angella and Glimmer, I was worried about her intentions and her loyalty. I wasn’t sure how safe it was to have her around.” Adora knew there was reason for that - she knew people had reason back then to mistrust Catra. That didn’t make hearing it any easier though. Catra had come so far, been so good to Adora for years now - the person she used to be was gone. This Catra, her Catra, was the best person she knew. 

“Catra’s come a long way.” 

“She has, I’ve seen it the last few weeks. The way she takes care of you, the way she  _ looks _ at you. It’s special, what you two have.” 

Adora smiled. That she could agree with. “I’m very lucky.” It was weird to have someone ask about Catra. At least, someone that wasn’t Bow or Perfuma and Scorpia. Someone who didn’t know them as well, didn’t see them as much. It gave Adora a strange comfort that she could open up a little. “I - I want to do that forever thing Netossa and Spineralla have. I want her to...be my wife.” Saying it out loud for the first time was oddly terrifying. 

“Marriage?” 

Adora nodded. “Not today, or anything, but like...maybe soon. To be able to say that like...she’s it, you know? The one and only for me...forever. I’d really like that.” The words hung in the air like storm clouds, Adora wasn’t sure if she’d maybe said too much, shared too much. She honestly didn’t know how much of her love life she was supposed to tell other people. She just knew that she enjoyed talking about Catra. 

When she looked at Castaspella after a long silence, there was a cheeky grin on her face. “We throw great weddings here in Mystacor.” 

“I said  _ not _ today,” Adora said with a laugh. “Once we figure out all this and I can do more than four pushups...maybe then.” 

Casta stood up, walking over and surprisingly, taking a seat next to Adora in the grass. “I understand, but you should also take what happened to you, as awful as it was, and let it be a reminder that there is no spare time to waste.” Adora knew that far too well, she’d had enough near death experiences to last multiple life times. “Obviously you don’t have to wed  _ today _ , but it might not hurt to consider taking the first step.” 

“The first step?” Adora furrowed her brows. “There are steps?” 

Casta laughed. “Well what do you think? You just decided to be wives and that’s that?” Adora’s expression must have answered the question for her. “My goodness the Horde didn’t teach you children anything.” Casta sighed dramatically, Adora knew well enough to know that whenever Castaspella begrudged the Horde she was almost always referencing Shadow Weaver. 

If only Shadow Weaver could see her and Catra now, in love and happy - despite her best efforts. Adora wondered if she’d be happy for them. If she would still be actively trying to keep them apart. 

She hated most of all that she cared at all what Shadow Weaver might think. The woman didn’t deserve the space she occupied in Adora’s head. 

“The first thing you have to do is propose.” 

Adora really felt like there would be more to that sentence. “Propose what?” 

“To Catra.” 

“Propose...to Catra.” 

Casta pinched the bridge of her nose. “Propose marriage to Catra. You find something you want to give her, something special to you that you want her to wear - to carry a part of you with her at all times.” The moment Casta said it, Adora’s pin came into her mind. She could see it on Catra’s dark red shirts and her black leather coat. The thought made her smile. “You do something romantic, like the night you had together a few weeks ago. And you just...give it to her and ask her to be your wife.”

Adora found herself smiling and she didn't even know why. “Then we’d be married?” Casta shook her head. “How many steps are there?!” 

“You have to have a wedding! Well, first you have to  _ plan  _ a wedding.” 

“How hard is that?” 

“That depends on how grand you want your wedding to be.” 

All Adora could see was her and Cara, maybe a few of their closest friends, and the beautiful fields just outside of Bright Moon, right before you entered the Whispering Woods. “Okay, then we just...do the wedding and then we’re together.”

“It’s a little more detailed than that, but yes. Then you’d be wives and then you take your honeymoon!” 

Where were all these weird words coming from? “Honeymoon?”

“Yes, a vacation for just the two of you, anywhere you want. A honeymoon is...an excuse to go anywhere in Etheria, or even the universe in your case, and nobody can say a thing about it because it’s your honeymoon.” 

Adora wondered if anyone else had ever considered their honeymoon to be aboard a spaceship under the stars, cuddled up in bed with ice cream and star charting. 

To Adora, all of this sounded wonderful - more so than she ever could have imagined. “I could see myself doing something like that.” 

“Well, don’t wait too long, you never know when someone else might try and take over the universe.” 

All the wonder and joy of the idea of marrying Catra dimmed a little with that one, very truthful, statement. As much as Adora wanted those things - as light as they made her chest feel when Castaspella was talking about them - she knew another fight was always around the corner. 

Adora found herself wanting to be alone again. “I think I’ll go wash up and get ready for tonight,” she said, standing up and refusing to acknowledge the way the pain in her back shot down her legs. 

At least she could stand on her own, pain or not, it was something. 

“Very well, I’ll send you and Catra both some attire for tonight’s event. I like to think I’m somewhat of a stylist.” Adora looked at Castaspella’s big cape and weird crown, but didn’t say anything. “You’ll both be dazzling the crowd tonight!” 

This could be a very long night. 

* * *

Adora didn’t feel any pain. 

Then again, she couldn’t really feel the tips of her fingers if she thought about it hard enough, but that seemed like a small price to pay for her back not hurting anymore. 

She was having fun, which was weird cause she didn’t really know anyone here. Just a bunch of stuffy, cape wearing magical people. They were nice, some of them were having fun  _ like _ her, but none of them were having as much fun  _ as _ her. 

From her seat, Adora’s leg bounced as she watched everyone dancing. She wanted to go out and dance, but she didn’t want her back to start hurting again, because it didn’t right now and that feeling was  _ great _ . 

So instead, Adora just watched and laughed and smiled. She felt so good. Better than she had in...forever. Why didn’t she do this more often? Drink and have fun, go to a party and enjoy herself. 

Reaching for her glass, Adora almost dropped it - again her fingers felt funny, but she managed to pick it up and put it to her lips. 

Unfortunately, nothing came out. It was empty and that was sad. She needed more. She needed to find one of those server people with the big goofy hats that had been giving her drinks all night and smiling at her. 

Adora went to stand, when she did, the room suddenly started to move beneath her feet. The air around her was floaty and it kind of reminded her of being in space. Everything was spinning and - 

“Whoa, easy there,” Catra. Catra was there, like always. 

A pair of hands landed on Adora’s shoulders and when she looked up, two different colored eyes were looking at her. “Your eyes are so pretty,” Adora said. She didn’t compliment Catra enough. She was going to start doing that all the time. 

“Thank you, but you almost fell over. I think we should maybe call it a night.” 

Maybe Catra was the enemy after all. “Aw, it’s just…” her train of thought stopped when the room started to move again. The last drink must have been stronger than the other seven. It was really hitting her hard. “Spinny.” This made Adora laugh. “That’s someone’s name. Spinnyrella.” How did Adora never realize how funny that name was? 

“Come on, blondie.” Catra spoke with such softness and Adora felt herself moving, following the gentle pull of Catra’s arms around her waist. 

Adora made sure to tell everyone goodbye and thank them for having fun with her. They were all so nice. They smiled at her and waved. Some of them told her not to go, the party was just starting! But Catra gave them a look and they backed down. Catra was pretty scary sometimes, Adora knew that - but she was also soft and nice and Adora was about to be alone with her. 

Which sounded kind of amazing. 

Eventually, they were in a much quieter place, a long and wide hallway that had pretty paintings on all the walls. “You know,” Adora said, her voice suddenly much louder than it was in the party. She noticed and started to whisper. “I always see these paintings in these castles, but I never see anyone actually painting them. Isn’t that kind of weird?”

“Magic is pretty weird,” Catra said, her tone light and sweet. She was so sweet. Adora leaned over and kissed her cheek. “Gross,” Catra laughed, wiping at her face with a free hand. “You really had fun tonight, didn't you?” 

Adora nodded, the motion making her head spin a little more. “Didn’t start that way, wearing this big goofy dress. Auntie Casta is no stylist.” 

“No, she is not,” Catra continued to pull Adora along until they were standing in front of their guest room door. Catra opened the door and she and Adora walked in, but when it suddenly closed behind them Adora looked back to see Catra’s tail on the handle. 

She reached back and grabbed it. “Your tail is so cool,” she giggled as it moved along her fingertips. Adora tried to turn to hold it better, but she nearly fell down. “Ha! Whoops!” She was laughing again. Tonight was so funny. So much fun. 

She wanted more fun. 

“Okay,” she said, pulling away from Catra, who looked worried but Adora was about to make her look totally not worried. “One cool thing about this ugly dress…” Adora put her hands on the shoulders and pushed them to the side. When she did, she shook a little and it slowly started to fall off of her. It was a  _ big _ dress. Now she was standing in just her underwear, which was white and lacy and pretty. She picked them for tonight. For Catra. “You wanna do the thing?” She winked, or tried to.

Catra was biting her lip, hard. It was the kind of look that made Adora’s heart flutter. She was purring and her tail was whipping back and forth. But she didn’t make any step towards her. “That offer would be a lot more enticing if you weren’t swaying.” Catra walked over to her, put a hand on Adora’s shoulder and started pulling her forward again. “Come on party girl, let’s get some sleep.” 

“Aw, sleep? But I’m not…” Suddenly, Adora was falling into bed. Catra pushed her! This made Adora start laughing again. “Catra! You pushed me! That’s cheating!” She felt her legs being lifted up onto the mattress. “Ooh, are we gonna do the sexy?”

“No.”

“Aww…”

She laid there for a moment, the spinning of the room slowing down a bit. When she turned her head to the side, she saw Catra sitting in a chair by the bed. She was taking off her boots that she hated and kicking them away. She leaned back in the chair, unbuttoning her top and slowly taking it off. 

Her sitting there reminded Adora of when Catra sat next to her when she was hurt. 

She was still hurt. 

Adora felt a sadness wash over her, like an open wound that had burst open inside of her chest. 

She just...

“I don’t want to fight anymore.”

Catra looked at her, slowly taking her arms out of the sleeves of her shirt and throwing it onto the floor. “Yeah?” Was all she said - her voice comforting. 

“I don’t want to be afraid anymore.” 

Catra stood up, she wasn’t wearing her shirt anymore and it made Adora blush, but the look on her face was gentle. She just loved Catra so much. 

“What can I do to help?” 

Adora smiled, how could she not? “Give me a house, not too far from our friends but like...far enough away that we can see the stars. We’ll need a farm so we have stuff to do. With chickens and cows and oh! Horsies!” Adora threw her hands in the air, this was  _ such _ a good idea. “Then we could just live there and not fight and not hurt and not be scared. Maybe we could even have little babies one day. A little Catra or Adora running around, riding on the horsies.”

Catra took a deep breath, kneeling down next to the bed - next to Adora. She reached out and put her hand on Adora’s cheek. The contact seemed to make Catra’s purring even louder. It was so nice and relaxing, maybe Adora was more tired than she thought. 

“Is that what you want?” Catra asked and Adora looked her in the eyes. 

“Mmhmm.” Was all she could manage, her eyes were barely able to stay open. “You have to be there too. Have to be. My Catra.” 

“Of course I’d be there, dummy.”

Adora giggled, “dummy.” She blinked slowly, it was getting harder to focus. “Your dummy.”

“Damn right,” Catra touched her face, her fingers so gentle.

“You do that for me?” 

When her eyes closed, she felt Catra’s lips press against her forehead. “Anything for you.”

Adora wasn’t in any pain when she fell asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone for the great support and feedback of this story lately. It's meant so much to see that you're all enjoying it and I hope that continues. I won't pretend I have a 100% grasp on how She-ra and Etheria and all that works, but I'm trying my damndest to have it make sense and flow well. Plus Catra and Adora are still soft babies and that'll never change. 
> 
> Anyway, appreciate the support so much, thank you all :)

Catra woke with a weight on her chest. Not a burden or a worry - an actual weight. 

It was Adora, her arm slung over Catra’s body like a fallen log. She looked over, taking in the sight of her girlfriend. Adora was lying face first on her pillow, mouth open, snoring softly. The blanket was pulled down a bit, exposing Adora’s back. 

The scars were still pretty deep and raw - when Catra helped her in the shower, they didn’t seem to hurt as much. The healers had done all they could, but only She-ra’s magic could really take them away. Even then, Catra wondered if that would be enough. 

Reaching over, Catra brushed a stray bit of hair that was hanging over Adora’s face, threatening to end up in her mouth. There were only a few mornings Catra was lucky enough to wake up early. To be able lie here and just watch Adora sleep. Sometimes she’d purr, just to keep her comfortable for however extra longer she needed to rest. 

Adora’s words from the night before were still ringing in Catra’s ears. To hear Adora talk about being afraid, talk about wanting to be safe and normal and not the hero she strived to be every day of her life, was pretty unreal. 

Catra couldn’t blame her. Why would anyone want to live with that much responsibility? To have the weight of a planet, a universe, on your shoulders had to be exhausting. 

The problem was, she’d never expected that from Adora. Adora who had chosen that sword and those powers over so much in her own life. Even if Catra didn’t hold any more anger towards Adora for leaving, it was still She-ra that Adora chose over the Horde - over her. 

So why the sudden change? Was it sudden at all? Or was Adora just drunk enough to open up about something she’d kept buried for a long time?

Catra didn’t know, and she didn’t really want to ask because she knew where she stood, she didn’t care if She-ra came back or not. Catra never fell in love with She-ra. She-ra wasn’t the girl who made her laugh every single day or held her in her arms after a nightmare. 

But She-ra mattered to Adora, and that was all Catra needed to know to accept it. If Adora wanted to travel across the universe to bring She-ra to every planet they could, then that’s what they were going to do. 

If she wanted to let She-ra go and be ‘just Adora’ for the rest of her life, Catra would be there for that too. 

When Adora started to stir, Catra rolled over and closed the distance between them. Adora groaned, her eyes opening for only a moment before shutting tight. Catra pressed her lips to Adora’s cheek, kissing her softly before laughing at the squeak of protest Adora made. 

“Morning, party girl.” 

“Mmmm,” Adora groaned. “Was there another fight?” 

Catra laughed. “No, you just lost a battle with a bottle of Mystacor’s finest.” 

“My head,” Adora opened her eyes again, finding Catra who could only smile. “I didn’t do anything stupid, did I?”

“Stupider then usual?”

“Oh ha ha...ow…” 

“You don’t remember?” Catra asked, hoping her expression wouldn't give away her disappointment. Adora shook her head too fast and immediately regretted it. Catra found her smile again, running a hand over Adora’s shoulder. “You were fine, just having a little too much fun. Nothing crazy. Mystacor parties are a bit wilder than the balls in Bright Moon.”

“Did you have fun?” Adora asked, always the worrier. 

Catra wouldn’t categorize last night as fun. It was loud and people were obnoxious and a lot of what they all did really didn't make any sense to her. They played some game with magical lights and the light chosen by the previous winner determined the next winner or...something. It was dumb, but they acted like it was the most exciting thing in the world. 

Still, none of that mattered, because Adora asked if she had fun and Adora had enough on her mind without feeling guilty about ruining Catra’s night. “It was fine. A lot of strangers I don’t know and the people here are…”

“Different,” Adora said with a soft laugh, still holding her head. “Sorry if I was a pain.”

“You weren’t,” Catra smiled. “It was nice seeing you cut loose a little.”

“Well I hope you enjoyed it cause I’m never gonna do it again.”

Catra rolled her eyes. Adora didn’t drink a lot, but every time after, she said exactly that. “Okay Princess.”

”At least we can finally go home today.”

“I’m going to hug our bed when we get back. The next time we come here I’m bringing fire to this one.” Adora smiled, but her eyes closed again. Catra scooted a bit closer to her, her hand hovering over Adora’s back. She was careful, but she let her fingers fall gently along the scars that decorated her skin. They were red and jagged, starting where her neck and left shoulder met and running all the way down. 

Adora tensed when Catra’s fingers touched her, but she didn’t say anything. It was important to Catra to touch them, to see them and remind Adora that they didn’t bother her. 

The night in the observation room, Adroa had stayed on her back while they made love. She said it was to be safe, to not strain herself, but Catra knew Adora was afraid. Afraid her scars would ruin the mood and shatter the moment. Afraid they might scare Catra away. 

Adora had a hard enough time being comfortable in her own skin, now that skin was marked, it just meant Catra had to work harder. 

“How do they feel?” Catra knew Adora would never tell her the whole truth. She might not flat out lie, but even if Adora was in tremendous pain, she would hide it as best she could. 

Still, Adora let her in more than most. “Not bad, kinda itchy to be honest.”

Catra smiled. “When they’re finally healed up I’ll give you a good scratch.” 

Leaning down, Catra pressed her forehead into Adora’s cheek, pushing against her affectionately. Adora reached up, cupping Catra’s cheek with her hand, holding her in place. 

“I love you,” Catra said. Adora was the only person in Etheria that had earned those three words from her. 

Adora held her a moment longer, eyes still closed. “Love you too.” 

“You sleep, I’m gonna go get my last helping of Mystacor fish.” 

“Ugh,” Adora groaned. “Don’t talk about food right now.”

Catra laughed the entire way out the door. 

* * *

“I’m gonna be sick,” Catra said, clutching her stomach as she fell to her knees. “Fish and teleporting don’t mix.” She gagged, her stomach twisting in knots. Melog was quick to find her, nearly knocking her over when they pressed their face into her neck.

“Sorry,” Glimmer said, not sounding that sorry. 

“Adora! Look at you!” Catra looked up just in time to see Bow wrapping Adora in a hug. 

She winced a bit, but her smile didn’t leave. “It’s good to be standing in Bright Moon again, literally.” 

Taking a breath, Catra pulled herself up to her feet, Melog still walking circles around her. “I’m just glad you let me put pants on this time.” She glared at them, all of them - they all deserved it. “I’m not teleporting again for at least the next month.” Glimmer made a face, an ‘I don’t know about that’ kind of face. “Oh come on, what is it now?” 

“It’s about the attack, isn’t it?” Adora said, her voice serious and determined. Not at all the vulnerable girl from the night before who wanted a farm and a family. “Have you guys found anything?” 

Glimmer cast a look Catra’s way. It was almost like asking permission to drag Adora back into this. Catra knew it wasn’t her place to decide what Adora did or didn’t do. She was standing. She was training - at this point, there was nothing Catra could do but support her. 

So she nodded slightly. 

“We found something. First One’s writing, to be precise. Apparently the people who attacked you had...something and were trying to decipher what it meant. They were obsessed with the First Ones - their history and their power and...what their power could create.” 

Adora quickly pieced it all together. “She-ra,” she said as her fists clenched. “They wanted to...learn how She-ra was made?” 

“We don’t know,” Bow said, stepping up next to Glimmer. “All we know is Perfuma has this...artifact. Some rock that broke off of a bigger rock, with some writing on it and you’re the only one who can read it.”

“Then we have to - “

“Adora,” Catra stepped in front of her. “We  _ just _ got home.”

“I know but -”

“You guys,” This time, it was Glimmer who cut Adora off. “It’s fine. Perfuma and Scorpia are coming here. They should arrive in a few days and from there, we’ll figure out what to do. We just got back, you just got back, let’s all relax for a bit.”

Catra took a breath, looking down to see Melog’s mane shift back to blue from the anxiety riddled orange they were showing. 

Truth be told, Catra was tired and homesick, which was kind of annoying because she didn’t even really like Bright Moon that much. But damn if she didn’t miss her own space. She wanted a night in her bed, breakfast in the main hall with her friends. She wanted to take a breath. 

Unfortunately, when she looked over at Adora and saw the look on her face, creased brows and lips pursed, she knew that was the exact opposite of what Adora wanted. 

“How was Auntie Casta?” Glimmer asked and when Adora didn’t answer right away, Catra stepped in. 

“She’s fine, Sparkles. They built some fancy little star watching space and she was really chatty about it. That’s what my genius girlfriend over here was planning when you kidnapped me.” 

Glimmer rolled her eyes. Catra took pride in every moment she made Glimmer do that. “You’re so dramatic. It’s not my fault you weren’t wearing pants.” Catra saw Bow grimace. “Oh right...Sea Hawk  _ did _ actually ask about them.”

“Well he can have them back if he wants, but there’s a hole in the back and his ass crack is gonna hang out of it.” The thought made Catra frown. “He might actually be into that…”  _ Ew. _

“Are you guys hungry?” Bow asked, clutching his stomach like he hadn’t eaten in weeks. And  _ she _ was the dramatic one. 

“I ate this morning, but princess here might…” Adora was still unfocused. “Hey,” Catra reached out and put a hand on Adora’s shoulder. When she did, Adora jumped. “Easy,”

Adora smiled and waved her off. “Sorry, I was spacing out.”

“You don’t say?” Catra teased, but she couldn’t help but be worried. Adora had been better the last few days in Mystacor. “You hungry?”

“Sure,” she said, a smile on her face that didn’t fool Catra for a second. 

It seemed to work on Bow though because he threw his arm over her shoulder. “I missed you guys,” he said. “Come on, we’ll go get some cake!” 

Catra’s tail flicked back and forth as she watched them go, Bow talking animatedly while Adora followed and listened. She felt Melog rub against her legs and tried to let them calm her down. She was fine, she just hated it when Adora let her head spin too much. 

“Everything okay?” Glimmer asked, sliding up next to Catra. 

“Yeah,” Catra nodded. It wasn’t entirely true. “Just a lot of new info thrown at her, I think. She’s had a long few weeks.”

“Sorry,” Glimmer sighed. “I should have waited to tell her.”

“No,” Catra waved her off. “No, she would have asked you about it right away no matter what. You’re fine. She just…” Catra stopped mid-sentence. She’d considered, for a moment, telling Glimmer all about what Adora had told her the night before. About her fears and hopes and wishes of something simpler. It was burdening Catra like a rock on her chest. She wanted to talk about it, she wanted to talk about it with Adora, but Glimmer would do. But she knew it wasn’t her place to tell anyone. She wasn’t even supposed to know - not unless Adora told her without Mystacor wine in her system. “We just need to figure it out and go from there.” 

There was a quiet between them that Catra found comfort in. She never would have thought years ago that she and Glimmer would be able to even be in the same room together. Now, Catra was thankful to have her, thankful for a friend like her who she could talk to, about pretty much anything. 

“You want some cake?” Glimmer asked, a smile on her face. 

Catra glared at her. “Is that all you princesses think about? Sweets?” 

“Pretty much,” Glimmer started making her way out of the room, turning around as she backed out - keeping her eyes on Catra. “You didn’t say no.” She said in a sing-song voice. 

Yep, one day, Catra would restart the war between herself and Glimmer. One day. For now…

“ _ Fine. _ ”

* * *

“I play my Knight Captain.” Bow said, drawing Catra’s attention. 

She studied him, watching as his right eyebrow raised just a bit. Too confident. “I challenge.” 

His confidence turned to disbelief. “What?! The round just started, you can’t challenge this early!’ 

“I can and I will.”

“But...I...nobody challenges this early!” 

“I’m not like nobody you’ve ever met before.”

“That sentence hurt my brain.” Glimmer groaned from her seat at the other side of the table where she’d been chatting with her father. Catra who simply stuck her tongue out at her. 

Bow was still sputtering, looking at his cards like he might be able to magically change them. Eventually, he laid his cards down, showing that he did  _ not _ have a Knight Captain.

“You shouldn’t lie,” Catra said, shrugging her shoulders as she shuffled the deck again. 

“Lying is the whole mechanic of the game!” 

“I never lie.” Catra said and Bow gave her a look. “When I play cards. In real life I lied all the time.” She had and she regretted most of them, but dammit if she wasn’t just trying to have a lighthearted game with some lighthearted jokes that don’t bring up a mountain of pain and guilt. “Deal again, this is fun.”

Bow started passing out the cards, clearly frustrated. 

Catra took this chance to look back at Adora, only now Adora wasn’t at the table anymore. Her plate was gone and she’d somehow slipped away.

_ Where did she go?  _

“Okay, loser goes first.” Bow said and Catra suddenly remembered their game. It was hard for her not to throw her cards down and race off, but she didn’t want to just abandon Bow. “I play...the Inquisitor.”

He was lying again. So easy to tell because his eyebrow did that stupid thing again. 

“Challenge.” 

“HOW?!” 

Catra cackled and reached across the table to flip his card. “Ha, a Jester! You gotta fix your tell.” 

“My...I do  _ not _ have a tell. Glimmer! Do I have a tell?!” 

“The eyebrow thing?” Glimmer didn’t even break eye contact with her dad. 

“That’s the one,” Catra said, already on her feet. “Work on that and we’ll play more tonight.” She set off to find Adora, rolling her eyes at the distant sound of Bow throwing a tiny fit.

As Catra made her way through the halls, Melog hot on her heels, she held her tongue to stop from calling out Adora’s name. She wasn’t even sure if she should be looking for her. Adora was an adult and if she wanted to be alone, she could be. Catra was worried, of course she was - Adora had been through a lot lately. But she was healing well and doing better. 

She was fine. Catra didn’t  _ need _ to worry. 

Not that that stopped her. 

“Have you seen Adora?” She asked the first guard she saw. The guard, a very tall woman, slowly turned to look at her. If she weren’t wearing a mask Catra was certain her expression would be blank. Instead of speaking, the woman simply pointed down the hallway to her right. 

Their bedroom wasn’t down that hall, it wasn’t even in that part of the castle. The only thing over there was…

_ Dammit, Adora _ .

Catra nodded a thanks and took off. She didn’t run, Glimmer had given her a very carefully worded plea that she not run in the castle. It took Catra a while to comply, but after a few years, she’d finally learned to pace herself. 

As expected, she found Adora in the training room. One day back, not even a day, a half a day, and Adora was working. 

“Hey, Adora,” Catra tried to keep the bite out of her tone, tried and failed. “What are you doing?” 

Adora didn’t stop, just picked up the heavy ball she was holding and threw it against the wall. It bounced against the wall and she caught it.

“Tired of swimming,” she said, throwing the ball again. “Needed to burn off some energy.”

“Weren’t you hungover like an hour ago?” 

She shrugged after her next catch, holding the ball in her hands. “Food must have helped.” That was a lie, because Adora had always been a terrible liar. Her voice goes too high and she refuses to look at the person she’s lying to. 

Frustrated, Catra stepped in front of Adora before she made her next throw. 

“Catra…” Adora pleaded, but Catra wasn’t having any of it. 

“One day, Adora. That’s all I’m asking. Let yourself rest for  _ one _ day.” Adora was hesitant. Her hands shook. Catra stepped forward and carefully took the medicine ball from her. “Bow and Glimmer want to spend time with you too, they’re just as worried about you as I am.”  _ That _ was a lie, because Catra refused to believe anyone was more worried than her, but still, Adora needed her friends. 

“I can’t just do nothing, Catra. I need to…”

“You don’t  _ need _ to,” Catra smiled. She didn’t want this to be a fight or an argument. She just wanted Adora to slow down. “There’s nothing we can do right now, not until Perfuma and Scorpia show up. When they do, we’ll get to work. But right now, you’re still recovering and we just spent three weeks sloshing around in the pools in Mystacor and I am asking you to  _ please  _ come play stupid games with me and your friends.”

“ _ My _ friends?”

Catra shrugged. “They’re not my friends, are you kidding? I have a reputation to uphold.” Teasing was fun, and when Adora laughed, Catra melted. “This will all still be here in the morning. I promise.” Catra hated that promise. She wanted to wake up tomorrow with nothing but peace in their future. 

So long as Adora was She-ra, that would never truly be the case.

Thankfully, Adora nodded and let her guard down and Catra was unable to stop her eyes from rolling before she just hugged her. 

Adora wrapped her arms around Catra’s waist, placing her chin on Catra’s shoulder. “You’ve gotten really good at this stuff, you know?” 

Catra sighed. “You’ve made me soft, I hate it.” 

“I think Mystacor’s fish made you soft.” Adora pulled back and poked Catra in the belly. This made her squeal.

“Hey! You know what, that’s it. I’m gonna kick your ass in cards tonight.” 

Adora laughed. “Please, I’m the best at that game.” 

“We both know that’s not true.”

“Are you saying you’re the best?” 

“Better than you...and Bow.”

“Aw, poor Bow. It’s his game too which makes it sadder.”

When they made it back to the kitchen, Micah was gone and Bow was dealing out cards with Glimmer, two spots already waiting for Adora and Catra. 

Seeing them waiting for her, making a space for her, made Catra’s heart flutter. These idiots had made her soft.

* * *

When she was growing up in the Horde, Catra never really dreamed at all. She would wake up to the wonderous stories of Adora’s ridiculous dreams and sometimes even to the soft cries after one of her nightmares. 

Either way, nights always seemed to belong to Adora. They slept in her bed. The woke up when she was up (because Catra was  _ never  _ up first). They’d spend a few nights a month getting through her nightmares. 

Catra didn’t mind, how could she? Adora was the only reason Catra was still alive back then. 

It was a strange thing to fully comprehend at such a young age, that her life was entirely dependent on another person. That if something happened to Adora or if she suddenly figured out that she was too good to spend all of her time with Catra, that eventually Shadow Weaver would get her way and just kill her. 

The feeling was something that should have made Catra angry or resentful, and deep down it did. Those feelings came out even more when Adora  _ did _ leave and Catra pushed every bit of blame and anger she had on Adora for abandoning her. 

When she was growing up though, Catra didn’t care if her life meant nothing without Adora. If anything, she agreed. Adora was the first person to ever stick around long enough to truly matter to Catra. She was the only one who stood up to her, who kept coming back whenever Catra would desperately try to push her away. 

Adora was Catra’s whole world in the Horde, which was why it all fell apart when she left. 

That’s when Catra started having nightmares. For the first time, her mind opened up and started tormenting her even in sleep. They were always painful. Always about her being forgotten or left behind. Whether it be from Adora leaving again. Scorpia leaving her. The Horde dumping her off in the woods to die. Adora and the Rebellion winning and throwing Catra in prison forever. Or just Catra falling in battle with no one around to mourn her. 

Being alone was Catra’s nightmare, yet it was the thing she constantly strived for for  _ years _ . 

Nowadays, Catra’s nightmares were mostly the same. Being left alone. Being empty and afraid and lost. Being tortured on Prime’s ship and Adora not coming to find her. Shadow Weaver suddenly rising from the dead and dragging her away from her new life. Reminding her in that sarcastically evil tone of hers that Catra didn’t deserve any of this. 

Tonight, Catra dreamed about a farm and big bed and waking up in a home of her own. She didn’t recognize the house from anywhere she’d been - Catra had no real idea what a farm would look like other than the few they’d been to on missions during Etheria’s rebuild. Even those were massive like workshops and not really places to live. 

All she knew was that it was home. 

Adora was there, of course, no home for Catra would ever be complete without her. There were beautiful white walls and fields she could see out the window and stretched as far as her eyes could see. 

The shape and colors of the rooms didn’t matter nearly as much as how they made her feel. That was the weight the dream carried the most, Catra just felt peace. 

There was no shock ending. No tragedy or monster showing up to take it away from her. It was hard to even categorize it as a nightmare at all. The reason Catra woke up with a rotting pit in her stomach was because of how badly she wanted that feeling to come back. 

She’d been up for a while now, maybe an hour, it was hard to tell in the dark. She sat, back against the headboard of her and Adora’s bed, listening to the sounds of Adora’s soft snoring. 

Normally, Catra would wake Adora up when she had a nightmare and Adora would do the same in return. It was their way, as far as tragic people go, they felt like they had a pretty good system. This one just didn’t feel worthy of a wake up. 

What would she even say? Sorry I woke you but I had this really weird dream where we were living in a beautiful house and there was no battle and no pain and we were happy - it really freaked me out.

No, there was no point.

Her throat was dry, or at least she could convince herself that it was to give her an excuse to leave. 

Fortunately, Adora slept through her sneaking out to the kitchens for a drink. She’d scoop some right out of the faucet with her hands if it didn’t make so much noise. Besides, she needed the walk. 

The halls of Bright Moon are peaceful at night, when there were only a few guards left roaming and everyone else was asleep. The walls weren’t as bright, tinted by the darkness outside. The murals and statues loomed over everything like protectors, keeping guard on this home that’s stood tall for centuries. 

Catra had never truly felt welcome here, not by herself. When she’s with the others, she could pretend it was her home, but like this, she felt the weight of where she came from. The weight of the things she’d done. 

Somehow, her feet carried her well past the kitchen and just outside of Bow and Glimmer’s bedroom. She stopped just outside their door, turning her back on it and sitting down. It reminded her a bit of Horde Prime’s ship. She and Glimmer had spoken through the cell door more than once, but there were many more times Catra would simply sit, unnoticed by Glimmer, and try to slow her mind down. 

It was nice, in that space that felt so scary and insecure, to know that Glimmer was there. It was a feeling that had carried over and grown through the years. Somehow, Glimmer had become a steadying force in Catra’s life. A person she could count on for honesty and balance. 

A friend. Someone Catra could safely say she would die for. After all, she thought that was the case once upon a time. 

Catra leaned back, her head hitting the door softly as she exhaled. She was going to be paying for this long night tomorrow. It really would be smart to go get her water and go back to bed. Adora might need her and even if she didn’t, cuddling with Adora was better than this. 

Unfortunately, before Catra could stand up, the backrest she was using started to move and she fell backwards as the door opened. She fell, feet going up in the air and everything. When she looked up, Glimmer was standing above her, hair a mess, eyes barely open - but somehow still glaring. 

“What are you doing?” She asked, her voice scratchy with sleep. 

Catra sat back up, slowly climbed to her feet and winced. “Sorry, Sparkles. I was just wandering. Didn't mean to bother you.”

“Catra,” Glimmer’s next sentence was delayed with a yawn. “It’s the middle of the night, why are you wandering?” 

Before Catra even realized what she was doing, her hand was suddenly touching the back of her neck. The feeling this reaction caused her was unsettling and sadly familiar. She hadn’t done that in a long time. 

Still, it was there and she was searching for something that didn’t exist anymore. The only thing the same from that time was Glimmer, still here - and Catra needed to feel safe again. 

“Has Adora ever talked about farms with you before?”

Glimmer’s tired expression shifted to absolute confusion in a matter of seconds. It was kind of impressive really, to see the many faces of the Queen in such a short span. Still, she didn’t brush Catra off. 

“What...no? She talks about horses a lot and...she likes corn?” Catra rolled her eyes. “What do you want from me?” Glimmer threw her arms in the air. “You wander out here in the middle of the night and ask me about Adora and farms. Are you feeling okay?” 

Catra knew it was crazy. She knew it didn't make any sense, she just didn’t know how to approach it. All she wanted was answers. Of course it would be easier to ask Adora - but Adora still hadn’t told her any of this while sober. 

Maybe Glimmer didn’t know about Adora and her dreams of a life outside of this place. But there was something Glimmer could answer. 

“What would happen if there was no She-ra?” 

Glimmer’s confusion faded a bit now. Her eyes opened a little wider and she reached back to shut her and Bow’s bedroom door behind her. “We’re going to get She-ra back. The writing’s Perfuma -”

“I didn’t say we weren’t,” Catra stopped her. “I asked you what would happen if we didn’t.” 

“I…” Glimmer paused, clearly trying to wrap her head around the question. Catra was glad for Glimmer’s hesitation. It made her feel better about having no answers herself. “Then she would just be Adora.”

“And that would be enough?”

That response got a reaction out of Glimmer, almost defensive. “Yes, she’s my best friend. Of course it would be enough.”

“For you, sure. You love her.”

“So do you.” 

“So do I.” Catra knew she was about to step into deeper waters. Too deep for this time of night, but she was never one for patience. “What about the other princesses? What about the people of Etheria? Who is Adora to them? We know they love She-ra, but...without that, would they still love her?” 

Taking a breath, Glimmer pinched the bridge of her nose and shook her head. “Catra, it’s late and...I don’t know what you’re looking for.” 

“I just want to know if we can’t bring She-ra back or...if Adora  _ chooses _ not to bring her back.”

“Why would she not bring her back?”

“Glimmer, please. Just...let me finish.” Catra just needed to say it, before she lost her nerve. Thankfully, Glimmer conceded. “I need to know that if She-ra doesn’t come back - that  _ Adora _ will still be loved.” Catra’s voice broke just a bit, but she had to keep going. She had to get it all out. “Adora  _ loves _ this world. You know as well as I do how much she cares about everyone and everything. She loves Etheria. She loves the princesses and the people in every kingdom. She loves her duty and she loves her role in taking care of them, but at some point, it’s too much and she’s taken too many hits and hurt too many times and if that point is right now and the risk of bringing She-ra back is too great, I need to know that this world and these people who Adora loves so much, will love her back. Her, not She-ra. If she wakes up one day and she can’t be their great, magical hero, I need to know they won’t turn their backs on her and break her heart.”

Glimmer was quiet for a long time after that and Catra couldn’t really blame her. It was a lot and it was a jumbled mess that probably didn't make any damn sense, but Catra was exhausted and stressed and she just had to say  _ something _ .

It took Glimmer a while, but when she spoke again, that comforting presence Glimmer always had was there again. 

“I can’t answer that, Catra. I don’t know. I’d like to think that they see her, and they see what  _ Adora _ has done for them, but I’d be lying to you if I said I knew for sure.” Catra could only nod, she knew it was true. Glimmer took a step forward, putting her hands on Catra’s shoulders. “I can tell you that we will. You and me and Bow...we’ll love her no matter what and if it’s just us. If, for some reason, she can never be She-ra again and the world decides to turn on her, we’ll still be there. And we’ll just have to work harder to make sure that’s enough.” 

A wave of emotion hit Catra, she may not have told Glimmer everything, but she told her enough to understand that she wouldn’t be standing alone if none of this worked. If the only thing left after all this was Adora, then Glimmer and Bow would be there at her side, to pick up the pieces. 

Closing the gap between them, Catra put her arms around Glimmer’s neck and hugged her. Glimmer didn’t jump or gasp or even twitch under the sudden embrace. Insead she sighed and put her arms around Catra’s waist. 

“You’re not the glittery little pain the ass I thought you were, you know that?” That wasn’t what Catra wanted to say, but she found those words so hard to speak. 

Thankfully, Glimmer was always good at reading between the lines. “I love you too, Catra.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for following and for your amazing support. The feedback on the last chapter was incredible and I hope we can continue that momentum here. 
> 
> The plot going forward here is me taking what little knowledge I have on First Ones and She-ra's history and just kinda piecing it together to fit with the story. I hope it's not too out there lol. This story has always been about Catra and Adora first - the other stuff is just necessary to get them where I want them to go
> 
> Anyway, more to come, ya'll are the best :)

Adora’s lungs burned. Her muscles were strained. She was covered in sweat and her hair was almost completely out of her ponytail, sticking to her face and fluttering in the wind. 

For the first time in weeks, Adora’s body felt good. 

Her back was still sore, but she was so glad to be outside again, even if it was just running around Bright Moon castle. The air was crisp, she could hear birds fluttering with all sorts of different songs that changed with each corner of the castle she reached. 

Her mood desperately needed this. 

Perfuma and Scorpia would be here soon. They would come with the First Ones relic they’d found from the people who had tried to kill her and it would all start up again.

Adora stopped to catch her breath, she’d lost count of her laps a while ago, it wasn’t nearly as many as she had been able to do before, but to be able to do it at all felt like a victory. 

There was a question in the back of her mind, one that had been there for days. One she had to try and answer.

She was alone, this was the best chance she would have to try without anyone around to distract her or worry about what she was doing. 

Taking a deep breath, Adora brushed the hair out of her face and closed her eyes. She held out her hand and tried to channel the feeling that was once second nature. She knew She-ra was in there - she had to be. How could She-ra just be taken from her like that? Blocked? Sure, that had happened far too often unfortunately, but even then Adora had flickers of power. It never felt like this. Never so empty and gone, like the feeling had never been there in the first place. 

That’s how she felt, trying to summon She-ra felt like something she’d dreamed about. There was no power, no magic inside of her. The harder she tried, the more her burns cried out in pain on her back. How had they done this to her? What did they do? Why?

So many questions and not one damn answer. It was infuriating. Adora was so tired of being in the dark. 

She was tired of this weight. If she let herself drift away long enough, she could imagine what her world might be like if she didn’t have all of this hanging over her. If she could wake up every morning and just be satisfied with what she had. 

If She-ra truly was gone, forever, what would she be to everyone else? 

She wanted to believe there was a life beyond war and struggle - but how could she enjoy something like that if she just gave up? A soldier was all she had ever been. A weapon, a warrior - fighting was the only thing she was ever good at. Ever good for. 

“For the honor of Grey -” 

A sudden cry in the woods caught Adora’s attention. It was shrill and startling. A scream loud enough to scatter a tree full of birds. 

Someone or something was hurt in the woods. She was closer to whatever that might be than she was to the castle. What if it was nothing? Why go all the way back to tell someone only to have it not matter. Or worse, what if she went back to find help and was too late to help whatever might be hurt. 

Adora knew better, she did. She knew if she went into the woods alone that Catra and Glimmer and everyone would be upset with her. She wasn’t ready. She wasn’t strong enough. It was too dangerous. Too risky. 

She was too weak. 

Her fists tightened at her side. She was tired of being weak. 

Without a second glance back at Bright Moon, Adora took off across the bridge and sprinted into the woods. 

The Whispering Woods would forever be confusing. Each time she stepped into them, it felt like she was walking into an entirely different area. As if the magic radiating from the ground changed the shape of the trees around her. 

Another sound echoed through the air, giving Adora a direction walk. It was definitely something in pain, something hurting. Adora knew better than to go in unarmed, and if She-ra wasn’t going to show up and give her a weapon, she’d have to make do. 

That weapon came in the form of a thick, jagged tree branch she ripped off and split with her knee to form a sharp end. She held it tight to her side, knowing it wasn’t the best weapon, but it was good enough. 

The sound, so desperate and pleading, continued to build with each step she took. Adora pushed away bushels of tall grass and fallen branches. Climbing over a few scattered rocks and overgrown vines until she finally stumbled onto a clearing. 

She could smell the blood before she saw it, spilled across the grass like a dropped can of paint. It was everywhere, and at the center was a deer, massive and beautiful. It was lying on its side with a deep, splitting wound along it’s ribs. 

Adora’s grip on her weapon tightened. 

She walked through the bloody grass, knowing it was staining her pants and would remove any chance she might have had to pretend this hadn’t happened. They would ask questions and give her their speeches - she knew it. She didn’t care, she couldn’t just leave this animal out here to suffer. 

When Adora reached it, their eyes met and the noises stopped. She felt her chest tighten in a moment she would never be able to explain to anyone. She knelt down beside it, it’s head moving towards her and Adora reached out, pressing her hand along the deer’s nose. 

“Shh, it’s okay.” She wasn’t sure if She-ra would be able to heal this, a wound so deep, but she’d done miracles before. 

That didn’t matter. She-ra wasn’t here. All she had was Adora and, like always, Adora wasn’t enough. The things She-ra could do so effortlessly. The heroic gestures she could make without a swipe of her sword and a glow of magic, were things that left Adora’s hands bloody. 

She ran her hand across the deer’s face, it stilled, a puff of air slipping through its nostril. 

It was ready. 

Adora grabbed onto its antlers, needing to keep it steady. When she did, she used her right hand to drive the branch through the deer’s neck. It cried out and Adora felt her stomach twist into knots, but she ignored the feeling, she had to finish it. 

She pressed harder, so much so that the pain in her back flared from the effort. She didn’t care - in a way, she welcomed it. Why should this deer be the only one suffering?

“Sorry, I’m sorry…” 

Eventually, the deer stopped jerking against Adora’s grip. She held herself steady, branch still firmly stuck into the animal. She had to be sure. She couldn’t leave this unfinished. 

Once she was certain, Adora opened her eyes, her vision blurry with tears as she stared up at the towering trees above her, decorating a cloudy sky above. She let go of her weapon, falling back to sit down and finally taking a look at the damage. 

The deer was dead, it’s eyes open and still - no longer in pain. 

Not saved by She-ra, but killed by Adora.

Her hands were bloody, the white top she was wearing matching the color of the jacket she’d lost when she was attacked. 

Suddenly, there was another sound - a screech not of pain, but of anger. She looked deeper into the woods, the trees rustling and moving in the distance. Something was, quite literally, knocking them over. 

Adora’s back hurt, her heart was racing and she was  _ still _ crying - but something was coming and it smelled blood and she was tired of running. 

She pushed up to her feet, ignoring the pain and the fear and everything else that had been coursing through her for days. She was ready to fight, ready to stand up for herself as Adora and do something, anything. 

Before whatever was coming reached the clearing she was in, something tugged against her pant leg and Adora looked down to see Melog biting at her clothes. 

“Wh -” She looked beyond where they came from but saw no one else coming. “Melog, I have to -” 

Melog cut her off with a sharp cry and before Adora could protest, they were using their magic to turn her invisible. 

When the beast reached her, finally stepping through the trees and into the open, Adora took a step back. It was massive, and hungry. It walked on all fours, green with scales and a long tail that knocked over the trees behind it as it swung. A creature this close to the castle wasn’t good, but right now, seeing it, with Melog at her side, Adora knew she was out of her depth. 

Slowly, she moved backwards, trying not to draw any attention. Thankfully, Melog’s ability to mask her presence, mixed with the body of the deer covering her scent, was more than enough for Adora to slip away. 

That didn’t stop her from feeling like a coward. That she would have to run off back to Bright Moon and tell someone more capable about the creature in the woods.

Adora was tired of failure. 

* * *

She could hear them panicking, before they even saw her, Adora could hear everyone talking about her. 

Catra was the loudest, Adora almost wanted to smile because Catra could be so aggressive when she was worried. She felt guilty, she knew what this would do to her friends but she couldn’t deny the call of that creature in the woods that needed her to come and release it. It felt like the only worthwhile thing she’d done in months. 

Still, the repercussions were coming, because she was still covered in blood and her hands were still shaking and she knew she’d messed up. 

So when Adora rounded the corner and Catra’s rant stopped suddenly, Adora knew she was done for. 

“It’s not mine,” she said immediately, hands up and the best smile she could find on her face. 

“Adora!” That was Glimmer, high pitched and furious. Bow had a hand over his mouth but he was running towards her. 

Neither of them were as fast as Catra. She closed the gap almost instantly and there was a fury in her eyes Adora hadn’t seen in a long time. 

“What happened?” She demanded, leaving no room for jokes. 

Adora looked away, she suddenly realized how selfish she’d been. After all she’d been through, how close she came to actually dying - she comes home like this? Without telling anyone where she went? 

_ Stop messing up, Adora.  _

“I’m sorry, I heard something crying out in pain in the woods and I just...I wanted to see what happened.”

Catra grabbed her hands, not caring that they were stained. “Adora, you’re covered in blood!” 

“I know,” she nodded, finally meeting Catra’s eyes again. “I was just running outside and I heard a noise. I went to check it out and a deer was hurt and it was dying and in pain and I couldn’t -”  _ I couldn’t save it.  _ “I couldn’t let it suffer.” 

“You killed it?” Bow asked, not shocked or upset, but clearly seeing all the blood painted a pretty grimm picture.

“Yeah, and there was something else out there...a big lizard creature thing and...I was -” Adora took a breath. “Melog found me, helped me get out of there. You’ll want to send some people to scare it away or deal with it before it gets too close to the castle.” Glimmer nodded but everyone was so quiet and it gnawed at Adora. She was tired of being the center of attention. Tired of the way everyone looked at her like she might fall apart at a moment's notice. “Guess I should go clean up, huh?” She laughed as she spoke, or tried to, but it was hollow and didn’t seem to land.

“Come on,” Catra said, putting a hand on Adora’s back and guiding her out of the room. 

They walked through the halls of the castle, the blood on Adora’s hands and clothes was drying fast. 

Melog was right behind the both of them, they’d been skirting around Adora’s legs the entire way home. While Catra was stiff and almost distanced, Melog was affectionate and pressing. 

Once they reached their bedroom, Adora let out a breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding. Her body ached, but that was nothing new. She’d been running and used a lot of effort to kill the wounded deer. Not to mention how nervous she was to come home and have to explain to the people she cared about just how reckless she’d been. 

She was frazzled and anxious and teetering on the edge just a little. Being back in her room with Catra was exactly what she needed to relax. 

“I can’t believe you,” Catra said and all of Adora’s anxiety returned. 

“What?” She turned to look at Catra, who was just scowling at her. 

“Adora, you...you can’t do stuff like that anymore. Running off to the woods on your own? Coming back covered in blood? What if Melog hadn’t shown up? What if that creature you talked about had found you? You can’t -” 

“Stop telling me what I can’t do!” Adora shouted, surprised by her own voice. Melog moved away from her, their mane a dark blue as they coiled away. 

Catra didn’t, she was as defiant as ever. “I’ll stop telling you what to do, when you stop doing stupid things!” 

“It wasn’t stupid! I couldn't just leave that deer out there to suffer!” 

As soon as she finished, Catra closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I know the last few weeks have been really hard for you. I’ve been there, I’ve seen it and I know you’re doing better and I’m  _ so  _ happy about that, but...you’re still not there yet. You’re not strong enough to wander into the Whispering Woods on your own. I know your heart is big, I know you can’t ignore these things and you have to help, no matter how reckless it is. I get it, but Adora...you have to be smarter about it. You have to remember you’re not...”

Adora knew where this was going, and her expression must have given her away because Catra immediately stopped talking. 

She needed distance, she needed to be away from all of this. Adora stepped back from Catra, hugging herself. “Trust me, Catra. I wake up every morning knowing  _ exactly _ what I’m  _ not _ anymore.” 

“Adora,” Catra tried, but Adora didn’t want to hear it. 

“I’m gonna go clean up.” She turned and left, Catra didn’t follow after her.

* * *

Despite having washed off every spec of blood and changing her clothes, Adora still didn’t feel right. The rush of adrenaline from the encounter in the woods had worn off and her body was aching again. She couldn’t stop replaying her last conversation with Catra over and over in her head - she hated fighting with her. Somehow, these fights, the ones that weren’t on the battlefield, felt worse. 

This thing they had now was too special to break apart.

Perfuma and Scorpia arrived by the time Adora was out of the shower. She could hear them chatting happily with the others as she approached the meeting room. They were telling stories, people were laughing, it was a welcome sound. 

The first person who noticed Adora was Glimmer, she smiled when she saw her - clean and fresh - before waving her over. 

Adora made her way to the table, ready to see this artifact up close. Catra was there, at Scorpia’s side listening to whatever grand tale she was being told. When her and Adora’s eyes met, Catra smiled just a bit. It was tight and quick, but it was enough. 

“Adora!” Perfuma’s soft voice filled her ears and she was being hugged before she even saw her. “Oh I’m so glad to see you on your feet again!”

“Thanks, Perfuma. It’s good to see you too,” Adora returned the hug gently. Perfuma was great for a bad mood. “I hope there hasn’t been any more trouble near your village.”

“No trouble at all! But definitely excitement!” 

Adora pulled away with a curious look, Glimmer spoke up for everyone to hear. “Yes, according to Perfuma, the artifact they found is pretty powerful.”

“It’s so cool! I’ve never seen anything like it!” Scorpia was practically bouncing. “When you hold it, it’s just like a rock, you know? Nothing special - just a chunk of rock. But we left it near a newly planted tree in Perfuma’s forest and it doubled the tree’s size in a matter of a week! There’s some seriously crazy stuff going on in this little thing!” 

As Scorpia spoke, Adora’s eyes fell to the rock in question lying on the table. It didn’t look like anything magical - just a jagged slap of rock that seemed to have fallen off of something bigger. It was wrapped in a white cloth and had markings on it Adora couldn’t quite see. 

Despite the look of it, unimpressive and simple, Adora felt a pull to it familiar to that of the sword she found in the woods years ago. She reached out carefully, noticing the way the room around her went silent as she did. It was heavy, more so than she’d expected and in her hands, it made her fingers tingle with energy. 

This was definitely a First Ones artifact.

“Anything special?” That was Catra, suddenly beside her - the fight from before no longer lingering between them. 

Adora looked at her, Catra was busy studying the artifact. They would talk about it later, but now wasn’t the time. 

Instead, Adora ran her free hand over the markings. “Perfuma is right, it’s powerful...whatever it was attached to before must be...unreal.”

“You actually...felt it?”

“Yeah? You didn't?”

Glimmer shook her head. “Just felt like a rock to me. Is it dangerous? Does it feel...dangerous?” Glimmer asked and Adora could only shrug. 

“What exactly does dangerous feel like, Sparkles?” 

Glimmer scowled at her. “If anyone would know, it’d be Adora. She holds your hand all the time.”

Catra laughed. “Hey good one.”

“Thanks,” Glimmer smiled. “Anything?” She questioned Adora again.

“Not sure, but most First Ones stuff seems to have some kind of risk reward to it. This is just…” That was when Adora’s gaze fell upon the word carved into the stone. It was written in First Ones dialect, a word she’d never seen before. 

“Touchstone,” she whispered. As with most First Ones tech she half expected saying the word aloud to make the thing spring to life and do something crazy. It didn’t, even the energy in her hand seemed to stay the same. When she looked back up, she was met with eager and confused faces. “Anyone know what that means?” 

“Never heard of it,” Scorpia chimed in first, scratching her head with a claw. “I know you can touch and I know what a stone is, and you’re touching a stone so maybe…” her sentence trailed off but Adora was pretty sure it wasn’t going anywhere.

“I’ve never heard it,” Glimmer said. “That rock doesn't look like anything I’ve ever seen on Etheria. See the lines on the inside of the crack, the red markings.” Glimmer stepped forward and traced her finger across the jagged, cracking markings of red where the rock’s interior was showing. “I don’t think we have that kind of rock here.” 

“The First Ones stretched far across the galaxy, if this rock isn’t from here then how did the attackers get it? Where did it come from?” Bow was asking questions almost to himself. A moment later, Adora saw him pull out his trackpad and start typing. “Maybe...maybe my dads might know?”

“Even if they don’t, they’ll love to hear about it,” Glimmer said with a smile that made Bow smile in return. 

As everyone started to talk and plan, Adora felt Catra still hovering next to her. When Adora looked over, Catra wasn’t looking at the rock anymore, she was looking at Adora.

“What?” Adora asked softly enough for only Catra to hear. 

“Still weirds me out that you can read that stuff.”

Adora smiled. “Still weirds me out that nobody else can.” Catra was so close now, smiling and keeping her hand pressed softly against Adora’s back. Right there to support her, like she had been for so long now. “About before -” 

“Okay,” Bow cut in, his timing was always terrible. “My dad’s just messaged and they’re practically demanding we visit and show them the artifact.” 

Catra groaned. “Why are we  _ traveling _ so much!” She laid her head on Adora’s shoulder as Melog made a pouting groan at their feet. “No, you’re coming this time. You’ve already guilted me enough about not going to Mystacor.” 

“It’ll be a fast trip, I mean, depending on how much Bow’s dad’s talk.” Glimmer said, looking to Bow who simply nodded in agreement. “Perfuma and Scorpia, you want to come?” 

“It was a long journey to Bright Moon, I think we could both use some rest.” Perfuma said, pressing against Scorpia’s shoulder. 

“That’ll give us time to go check on the old gardens here!’ Scorpia was practically jumping. 

“I guess it’s just a Best Friend Squad trip! Been a while since it was just the four of us.” Melog cried in protest. “Uh... _ five _ of us.” 

Taking a deep breath, Adora put both hands on the rock and felt Catra’s hands grab onto her shoulders. Bow and Glimmer stepped up next to them, Glimmer’s hands touching Adora and Bow. 

Catra’s grip on Adora’s shoulder was deadly. “Why do we keep doing this?” 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick and very important thank you to everyone who has read and supported this story. The feedback and support has been amazing and motivating and so greatly appreciated. 
> 
> As you can see, we've got a chapter length now. 16 in total which means we're closer to the end than the beginning. 
> 
> I won't prattle on any more, read, enjoy and comment if you do, thank you again :)

Bow’s dad’s were...a lot. 

They were fine, really. Catra didn’t mind them. They were welcoming and kind. They offered everyone drinks and food and these tiny little cheeses that Catra could sit and eat a billion of - but when they started going wild about the artifact, Catra used that as her chance to slip away. 

She’d never seen any place quite like this. The idea of this many books and scrolls that had documents and stories about...everything, was intimidating. 

It was also a good reminder of how little they actually learned about growing up. So many of these books, Glimmer called them ‘non-fiction’ were about people and places she’d never even heard of before. The history of the various kingdoms and the people who ruled them. The stories of the Whispering Woods and even a few about the origins of Hordak’s arrival and the Fright Zone. 

Catra couldn’t help but wonder if she’d done enough in her life to make it into one of these texts. Though, if she did, it probably wasn't a story she wanted to remember. 

Unless someone wrote about the Heart of Etheria. She’d read that story again and again. 

Still, all of this was fascinating and Catra found herself alone, surrounded by books and just...learning. She wasn’t reading page by page, just skimming and scanning, trying to absorb as much as she could. It was really a lot of fun and not at all what she expected this place to be like. 

Curiosity, as it always did, got the best of her and she found herself lost in the search for one thing in particular. There was  _ so _ much about everything - so many stories of races and species and the people that lived here. 

There had to be something about...

“Catra?” 

She’d heard Adora coming before Adora found her, but she didn't feel like moving away from her stack of books. Instead, she sat, ears listening to Adora’d footsteps, waiting to be found. 

When Adora did find her, Catra was still reading - still trying to process their fight from earlier today. 

She wasn’t mad, she was just frustrated and honestly didn’t know how to approach it.

“Catra?” Adora called again, she was too close for Catra to ignore. So she looked up as Adora came towards her. “What’s that?” 

Catra shrugged. She had no idea where to begin. “Etheria. Just...a lot of random stuff. Stuff they never showed us in the Fright Zone.” 

“So pretty much everything then?” Adora laughed and Catra could only nod in agreement. 

“It’s pretty ridiculous how much they kept us in the dark.”

“Hard to attack people when you learn where they came from and what they stand for.” Adora pulled up a chair and sat down across from her. Catra peeked up just in time to see Adora grimace as she sat. Still not one-hundred percent. “Better to tell naive children princesses are evil and leave it at that.” 

“Did you know that Scorpia’s grandfather basically  _ handed _ the Fright Zone over to Hordak?” Catra found the book that mentioned it and slid it across the table to Adora. “Didn’t fight, didn’t resist - just surrendered his entire kingdom to him. Like some kind of offering.” Catra felt a bitter laugh bubble in her throat. “That means that no matter what she wanted to be, Scorpia was born into the Horde - raised to believe that was the whole world. Her own family didn’t even fight for her to have a choice.” She sighed, not entirely sure where any of this was going. “Makes me wonder what other people in Etheria handed over to Hordak in hopes of being spared.” 

Adora was looking at her, finger on her place in the book. Catra couldn’t return the look, instead pretending she was still reading even though the words on the page were out of focus. She’d said too much already. 

“You’re wondering if maybe that’s how you ended up in the Fright Zone? An offering for Hordak?” 

Catra found herself laughing, it tasted like ash in her mouth. “I suppose that would be better than what I assume. At least then my parents would have dumped me with reason - not just because they didn’t want me.” 

“Catra…”

“Come on, Adora,” Catra cut her off. “We both know the story - Shadow Weaver made sure I did. Unwanted runt in a box. Left for dead. If you hadn’t shown an interest in me back then she would have thrown me in the incinerator.” Adora was ready to do that thing she did where she tried to make Catra feel better. It was sweet, but totally unnecessary. She waved Adora off. “It’s not a big deal. I’ve dealt with it, I guess I just thought if the history of Etheria was in this room, maybe I’d find something about where the hell I came from.” 

Adora didn’t immediately jump back into her sympathy, which Catra appreciated. She wasn’t looking for that. This wasn’t something that tortured her at night or kept her from sleeping. It was just a whisper in the back of her head that came up every now and then. 

It was hard to be bitter about her past when her future had become so much more than she’d ever thought possible. She still had this girl. Blonde hair and bright blue eyes, fiercely loyal and sitting across from her despite everything they’d been through. 

No matter how bad Catra’s life had been, she still considered herself lucky. 

“You wanna keep looking? Bow’s dad’s are gonna be working for a while. They have...a lot of information on the First Ones.” 

Catra found herself studying Adora. Adora, who had fallen into this world through a portal. Like so many other people in Etheria, Adora was set up for a life she was never given a chance of surviving.

“Thought you’d be more interested in what they have to say.” 

Adora pursed her lips, nodding slightly. “I am, but...I didn’t like the way our last conversation went and...I’m more interested in being here with you.”

Damn her and those soft words. “You scared me.”

“I know,” Adora lowered her head. “I didn’t mean to, I just…”

“Had to do something?” Catra finished the thought for her, it was the singular thing that drove Adora. Her need to help. It was her best and worst quality. Adora nodded, but didn’t say anything else. “I know it’s hard to remember in those moments, Adora but...it’s more than just you out there when you’re making those decisions."

“I know…”

Catra responded before Adora was even finished talking. “I don’t think you do,” her voice was steady, she was working extremely hard not to sound upset. “This, me sitting in here looking for scraps about where I came from or what my birth parents might have been - it’s all dead ends. I know that, I’m curious, not delusional. In the end, this stuff doesn’t even matter.” Catra closed the books she was reading for emphasis. “ _ You _ , Adora, are my family. You’re my past, my present and my future. I know this She-ra stuff is important to you and I respect that. I’ll help you however I can, to bring her back and do your duty to protect Etheria and the universe and whatever else that might be - but what about us?” 

Adora was looking at her intensely, her eyes almost desperate, but she didn’t seem upset or emotional. Just...intense. 

“What about us?” Adora asked, not accusatory - genuinely curious. 

Catra knew she had to take a shot, with everything going on, she might not have a better chance. “Have you ever thought about life...beyond She-ra,” Catra was hesitant to phrase the question like that. She didn't want to make Adora think that she had to choose between her and She-ra. That would never be the case. “I mean...we’ve been doing this for so long and you’ve been through so much. You’ve almost died in my arms  _ twice _ and I just...when do we get to start our lives together? You and me.” 

Adora opened her mouth to say something, but then snapped it shut. She seemed lost, and Catra couldn’t really blame her. This wasn’t intended to be an ambush, hell, Adora found her. Still, Catra knew this was her moment and she was going to pounce on it. 

“What do you mean?” 

She was going to have to spell it out for her. “You know, a home of our own. A life outside of Bright Moon. A...family…” saying it out loud was more terrifying than she’d expected it to be. So much so that she could barely look at Adora. 

What she didn’t see, she heard, when Adora gasped across from her. “You’ve thought about that?”

_ Not until you mentioned it while you were drunk. Since then it’s all I can think about. _

That’s what Catra wanted to say. 

“I guess I just...want it to be a possibility, you know? Something we  _ could _ do if we wanted. Something...to look forward to.” 

Adora was quiet for a long time after that, she sat with her hands in her lap - looking at the books scattered across the table. For a moment, Catra considered standing up and walking around the table to hug her. 

She didn’t, and eventually, Adora found her voice again. 

“I have to figure what’s happened to She-ra,” Catra’s heart sank, it was strange be disappointed about something she’d only even started to consider just a few days earlier. “But...I would like to talk about... _ that _ with you, after. I - I think there’s a lot we need to talk about.” 

When Catra met Adora’s eyes, she found the girl she’d loved for as long as she could remember - staring back at her and searching for the same comfort Catra was. 

“Okay, then let’s figure out this She-ra stuff.” 

* * *

By the time Catra and Adora returned to the group, Bow’s dad’s were practically bouncing off the walls. They were absolutely enthralled with the artifact. The designs on the rock, the feeling of magic that radiated from it - they were thrilled. 

The more Catra watched them, the more she saw of Bow in them and for some reason that made her happy. Perhaps it was her own thoughts of family from before, but seeing it up close and personal like this was reassuring. Maybe she didn’t have parents and stuff like this of her own, but it existed and that gave her hope. 

She didn’t really listen as they talked, most of what they said went over her head anyway. Instead, Catra found herself watching them, studying how they moved and interacted. They were always close, always within a certain distance of one another. When one talked, the other listened intently. They shared a lot of smiles and finished each other’s thoughts. It was nice, and all Catra could think about was how they had this place out here all their own. They were safe and together and, if needed, could help, but it wasn’t a requirement like life in Bright Moon. They had their isolation and peace. 

It was something Catra realized that she wanted. With the girl standing next to her, close enough to reach out and touch. 

So she did, Catra reached over and took Adora’s hand in her own, for no other reason than wanting to. 

Adora opened her hand up for Catra to take, when they looked at each other, Adora smiled. 

“So this touchstone is…”

“A source of  _ immense _ power! The fact that this rock is still radiating power despite being nothing more than a shard is incredible!” This one, Lance - he was where Bow got his overwhelming enthusiasm from. He was throwing his hands on the air, he’d be jumping up and down if his husband wasn’t keeping a hand on his shoulder to keep him in place. 

“Whatever it is and wherever it came from, it’s not from here. Not Etheria. Something this powerful, if the rest of it was here, you’d feel it.” He directed his comment to Adora who seemed confused. 

“Me? What about Glimmer or King Micah? They’re the magical ones.”

“Adora, you said you felt magic from this thing when you touched it?” Glimmer asked and Adora nodded. “I didn’t, it just felt like a piece of rock to me. Whatever it is must be tied to you or to...She-ra.” 

Adora’s grip on Catra’s hand loosened. “She-ra isn’t a part of me anymore.”

“What?!” Bow’s other dad, George, sounded like something physically punched him. “You’ve lost She-ra?”

“I was...attacked in a fight, something magical and...since then I’ve felt no connection to She-ra. This artifact is a part of whatever plan the people who attacked me were trying to do.” Adora stepped forward, dropping Catra’s hand and leaving her feeling empty. Still, Catra said nothing and watched Adora retake the artifact into her hands. She held it, studying it, then looked to Glimmer. “You really felt nothing?” 

“I didn’t. Perfuma and Scorpia didn’t either.” Glimmer said, almost sadly. Like she felt bad that she was putting the weight of all of this on Adora. Because of course it was, it was always Adora. “What do you want to do?” 

Adora took a deep breath, then turned to Bow’s dads. “So it’s not on Etheria? Do you have any idea where it might be?” 

“An item that powerful, with that kind of magical draw to you has to have some draw. You could wander space and simply hope you stumble across it. We have studied some of the constellations, but not nearly as much as we’d like. Certainly not as much as I’m sure the First One’s had centuries ago.” 

They went on like this. Talking about all of the different ways to find something that they had zero clues about in the middle of space. If this Touchstone wasn’t on Etheria, then it might as well not exist. They would never find it. They were lucky, but not miracle workers. 

Catra knew what this meant. It was a mission for Adora. A new responsibility that she would carry until she fixed it. Whatever this thing was, it was powerful enough to make people end their lives over. More than that, it was the first bit of magic that Adora had felt since she lost She-ra. 

It was such a small flicker of hope, of this destiny that seemed to forever control their future. 

If they didn’t fix this, Adora would spend the rest of her life chasing it. 

No one in Etheira would have a record of this touchstone or it’s location. 

But…

“Horde Prime.” Catra said, the two words leveling a silence over the room. Adora looked at her like she’d spoken a forgeign language, but Glimmer’s eyes were more telling. Like she already knew. “He spent  _ centuries _ traveling the universe - conquering it.” Catra looked at Adora, wanting to convey how much she wanted to help. Because she knew Adora was about to freak out. “There’s no way something this powerful didn’t grab his attention.” 

Adora turned to face her, and it felt like the rest of the room disappeared. Those blue eyes looking at her, confused but somehow already begging her not to do whatever it was about to do. 

“What are you saying?” 

Catra took a deep breath, she just hoped Glimmer would have her back. “I’m saying...if we want to find this thing, we need to access his network. His memories and his files and...we can use that to find this thing.” 

“Catra…” That was Glimmer, taking a slow step around Adora and looking at Catra like she knew exactly what Catra was going insane. “Where are you going with this?” She asked, even though it was clear she knew  _ exactly _ what Catra was saying.

“I’m saying, we need to go see Entrapta.”

* * *

Adora was mad. 

Plain and simple. She was mad and she was pouting and Catra expected nothing less. It felt good, in a way, to know that Adora carried so much stock in her well being. Yes, she would rather Adora be on board with the idea and accept Catra’s help, but there was a part of her that felt selfishly good about Adora’s concern.

Still, Adora had been through enough the last few weeks and Catra didn’t want to add stress and fighting to that - they’d already fought once today and they certainly weren’t going to end their night fighting. 

So that led them back to their room in Bright Moon. 

Tomorrow they would be setting out for Dryl. No Glimmer which meant no teleportation. Not that Catra minded, she would rather travel the normal way anyway - or as normal as flying on Swift Wind could be. But no Glimmer meant it would be just her and Adora. If that was the case, they had to be better than this. 

Catra found herself sitting on their bed, watching as Adora took out her anger on the clothes she was changing into. She slammed her shirt down onto the floor, right on top of her pants, before angrily putting on her tank top and sleep shorts. She wouldn’t look at Catra - not entirely, only small glances and upset sounds of disapproval. 

It would be annoying if it wasn’t so cute. 

Once Adora was fully changed into her sleeping clothes, she just stood there, facing the wall and clenching her fists. Catra simply sat and waited, she knew the conversation was coming - it was just a matter of waiting for Adora to start it. 

When Adora did finally turn around, all red faced and blue eyes narrowed, Catra smiled at her softly, tail swishing back and forth. 

“You can’t do this,” Adora said, her voice steady as she took a few steps towards Catra. 

“It’s our best shot.”

Adora shook her head. “It’s too risky. It’s too much...Catra...I - I won’t let you.” The threat sounded as weak as they both knew it was. 

“Adora…” Catra laughed breathily. “You know that doesn’t work. On either of us.”

“It’s dangerous,” Adora’s anger broke, just like her voice. It was enough to wipe the smile off of Catra’s face. 

Instead, Catra nodded, waiting for Adora to seek her out. “I know,” she said, using her tail to rub the side of the bed she wanted Adora to sit on next to her. “But not as much as it used to be.” 

When Adora did sit, she looked more fragile than she had in days. Her body slumped, her head heavy...she looked tired. All of her previous resolve crumbled. Catra put a hand on her back, careful not to press into her scars too hard.

“You don’t know that,” Adora said, looking at Catra with worry in her eyes. 

Catra could only smile again, Adora really could be an idiot sometimes. “Yes I do, I know because  _ you _ finished Horde Prime. You kicked his ass and all that’s left are his files - just sitting there. Completely harmless.” 

Adora shook her head, untied blonde hair swaying from side to side. “You want Entrapta to  _ chip _ you.”

“Just so I can access the files.”

“You’ve accessed his information before without the chip!”

“It’s been years, Adora. Years I’ve been free and years I’ve replaced the visions and the memories of the chip with good things.”

“Why does it have to be you?” The irony of Adora asking that question to her was not lost on Catra. 

How far they’d come and yet things never seemed to change. “Do you really want Hordak to do it? To be back in big brother’s network? Seeing all his plans and memories?” Adora’s lack of response was the answer Catra needed. “I’ve been there, Adora. I was there for  _ days _ . I know the places to look and how to get there.”

“But can’t we just…”

“It has to be me,”  _ because it’s for you and I only trust myself when it comes to you. _ She didn’t say that aloud, but it was in the back of her throat. “It can’t be anyone chipped on Etheria, they were just getting transmissions. I was…” a flash of green lit up in Catra’s mind. The feeling of being consumed in Horde Prime’s pools of mind breaking liquid. His voice taunting her, the crowd chanting relentlessly as her body was destroyed to break her down. 

She had to fight it. If she couldn’t handle it in the safety of her own bedroom, with Adora at her side, she stood no chance at accomplishing her goal. 

Catra took a deep breath, and suddenly it was Adora’s hand on her back, comforting her. 

“I can do this,” she said, finding Adora’s eyes again. “I just need you to  _ trust _ me.” 

That did the trick, and Adora dropped her head on Catra’s shoulder, lips pressing into Catra’s fur. “I do trust you,” she whispered. “I’m just scared.” 

Feeling Adora so close and so open sparked something in Catra. 

She had to do this now, she had to take the chance and get it all out there. 

“Adora,” she pulled away just a bit, watching those soft blue eyes look up at her. “After we fix this, after we...do whatever we have to do to fix this.” Catra reached up and touched Adora’s cheek with her hand. “I want to marry you.” Despite the awestruck, tear filled look that Adora gave her, hearing the words come out of her own mouth made Catra laugh. 

Adora did  _ not _ find it amusing. “Was that a joke?!” She asked, completely pouty and affronted, which only made Catra laugh more. “ _ Catra! _ ” 

“No,” Catra tried to calm herself down, but god she sounded so stupid. “I’m totally serious. I want to marry you, it’s just...what the hell happened to me?” She was still laughing, still so hopeless and insane. What  _ had _ Adora done to her? “I used to think I was some big badass Horde soldier but the truth is, all I ever wanted was  _ this _ . To be some lame idiot who sat in her room and spilled her lame guts out to her lame girlfriend.” Her laughs turned into cackles and eventually she fell back onto the bed, holding her stomach. “If past Catra could see me now she’d -”

The sentence died when Adora reached over and pressed Catra into the bed. She held both Catra’s wrists in her hands, pressed down on either side of her. Adora was  _ right _ there, hovering over Catra, looking into her eyes. There was a passion and a fire in Adora’s expression she hadn’t seen before. 

Whatever humor Catra had found in the situation burned to ash in her chest. “You want to marry me?” 

Catra exhaled, a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. “Yep,” she knew she needed more. There was so much more. “Marry you, get our own place. Stop living out lives from mission to mission. Maybe...a farm?” as soon as she said it, Adora’s eyes went wide. “Start a family.”

The grip on Catra’s wrists went away, and Adora sat back up, almost guiltily. Catra hated that the universe had done this to her. Had made her think that having dreams and desires of her own was somehow wrong. 

“I don’t...I haven’t…” Adora was trying, no doubt, to find some excuse as to why that was impossible. Catra thought that maybe Adora’s reason for keeping quiet about it for so long was because she used the idea of Catra not wanting those things as an excuse to hide. 

If that was the case, Catra was ready to put an end to that. “You were drunk, in Mystacor and you...told me about all these things you wanted.” Adora looked at her desperately, but Catra knew she had to keep pushing. “You told me about the house, the farm, the cows and horsies and...the family. The life away from all of this - away from risking our lives and being in constant fear and pain.” Catra moved so she was on her knees on the floor, stuck right in between Adora’s legs to see her face. She reached up, cupping Adora’s cheeks with her hands, making them look at each other. “Things you  _ deserve _ .” Catra used her thumb to wipe a tear that had slipped down Adora’s cheek. “It’s funny, I hadn’t thought of any of that - not once. Then you go and get drunk and tell me and now...it’s all I can think about.” 

“ _ You  _ want those things?” She asked, almost incredulously. 

Catra chuckled. “Now you know why I was laughing,” she said and Adora nodded, a small smile on her face. “I know we have to do this - fix this. I know you won’t stop until She-ra is...whatever and I’m okay with that. But, when it’s done, and we figure it out, I want to...try.” Catra hated dancing around it, she knew she just had to say it. “I want to marry you and find that life we both have  _ earned _ . I want that, with you. If...if you’ll let me be a part of it.” 

Suddenly, Adora was kissing her. Catra was practically being pulled up off the floor and into Adora’s lap. She put a hand on the back of Adora’s head, helping guide her to the bed as they fell backwards. 

The kiss lingered, soft and passionate. Like finally taking a moment to catch their breath. 

When Catra finally pulled away, she looked down at Adora, hair splayed around her head, cheeks red and eyes bright. She had to ask again. “Marry me?”

Adora smiled, “yes.”


	11. Chapter 11

Adora was a _mess_.

On the one hand, she was practically bouncing. Catra _proposed_ to her. 

Catra Proposed! 

Yes, she was a little annoyed because she had been planning to do it - and by planning she had a four page journal to make sure it was perfect - including locations, times of day, what she might say or offer as a gift. Typical Catra though, just jumping in head first and taking it. 

Adora was going to marry Catra. The word carried a lot of weight in Etheria. It meant a lot, even if it didn’t carry as much value to Adora - she knew it was a big deal. 

She was happy. When she told Glimmer they screamed and hugged and then Bow showed up and he screamed and hugged. It was wonderful. 

Catra...was going to be her wife. 

_That_ word carried weight to her.

Her (soon to be) wife...who was dragging them to Dryl to do something extremely dangerous for her. 

Which was the other side of Adora’s current emotional journey. She was so happy, but this trip was looming over them like a dark cloud. She felt heavy and sick with every step they took closer to Entrapta’s castle. 

It wasn’t like coming here would change anything. Entrapta wouldn’t say no - not at the chance to experiment with Prime's tech on a live subject. 

There was no talking Catra out of it, and if Adora took the emotion away from the situation, she knew it was a plan that would probably work. The prospect of hunting for this Touchstone on their own was next to impossible. Space was too big, There was no way they could stumble across that in their lifetime and who knew what threats might be around the corner.

The closer they were to Dryl, the more the sky darkened above them, it was fitting. 

Swift Wind dropped them off, more than ready to turn around and head back, they convinced him to wait outside.

As they approached, the front gate of the castle opened and a bot stepped out, because of course it did.

Adora hesitated, she never quite knew with bots. She knew Entrapta had Emily and Emily was nice but this wasn’t Emily. It was taller and skinnier, with a face that looked like the screen of one of Bow’s trackpads. 

When it’s face made a sudden, static sound, Catra squeaked beside her and grabbed onto Adora’s arm. 

A moment later, Entrapta’s face was staring back at them. “Hello!” Entrapta smiled that big, unassuming smile of hers. “Oh, it _was_ you! I thought Macy might be broken when the report said you two were here!” 

“Who’s Macy?” Adora asked. 

“Macy guards the door! Say hi, Macy!” At that, the machine displaying Entrapta’s face raised one of its arms (that kind of looked like a laser cannon) and waved at them. 

“Entrapta we...need your help.” Adora knew it wasn’t worth it to try and make small talk with Entrapta. She didn’t care about that. 

“Can we come in?” Catra cut to the chase. “Talking to you through this thing kinda sucks.” 

“Oh right! I imagine the sound quality isn’t great either. I’m working to try and extend wireless communication! The walls of the castle don’t help with the frequency either. It’s so -” 

“Entrapta!” Catra was losing her patience. “Can we come in?” 

“Doors open!” She said and then her face flickered off the screen. 

Catra groaned as the robot walked away from them. “You know, you’d think she’d have a robot to help guide people through her castle.”

Adora smiled. “I don’t think she wants people in her castle.” Together, they made their way inside. 

The castle looked a lot like Adora remembered. The walls were narrow and kinda felt like they were caving in on them. Most of the vents didn’t have covers because Entrapta used them to get around. 

It only took them a few minutes to realize they were lost. Of course they were, this castle was a maze and it felt like it somehow became even more confusing than the last time they were here. 

Each hallway they took led them to another hallway. They twisted and turned, opening up a door that led to a kitchen where a few people were working. Adora asked them where Entrapta might be, but they had no idea. 

They continued their wandering, until they, quite literally, bump into someone in one of the halls. 

“Oh I’m…” Adora started but stopped as soon as she saw green eyes looking back at her. 

“Hordak,” Catra bit - a tension hovering between the three of them. “If I’m being honest, I kinda forgot you were here.” 

He narrowed his eyes at her. “Yes well, seeing you again is atop a long list of things I was trying to avoid as well.” 

For some reason, this made Catra laugh. Adora didn’t know how to feel about Hordak. In the years since Horde Prime, they hadn’t heard a thing from him. He was here with Entrapta, occasionally they would get tech from her to help with the rebuilds and advancements in space travel. Sometimes Entrapta would go with them on missions, but never Hordak. He was just here...working.

There were those in the Alliance that wanted Hordak imprisoned or worse - and they had every right to that. He tormented Etheria for decades and did things that were unforgivable. If anyone knew about it, Adora and Catra both did. But they were given second chances, they earned them. What good would it do to not allow Hordak the same thing? He fought with them, in the end, against Horde Prime. He had an extremely short leash, but with Entrapta by his side, Hordak seemed entirely content where he was. 

Unfortunately, that didn’t make being around him any easier. 

His eyes narrowed. “I’ve come to take the two of you to Entrapta.”

Adora huffed. “We were on our way.” 

“You’ve been wandering the halls for nearly twenty minutes.” He gestured for them to follow. 

“Seems like you know Entrapta’s halls pretty good, huh?” Catra just couldn’t help herself.

Hordak kept pace in front of them, guiding them through the castle. “I’m far less incompotent than you. I learned the layout almost immediately.”

“Right,” Catra didn’t press and Adora was so thankful for that. She knew how quickly things between Catra and Hordak could deteriorate - there were giant holes in the Fright Zone to prove it. If they wanted to actually get anything out of Entrapta today, it wouldn’t do any good to start a fight with her...whatever Hordak was to her. 

Once they reached Entrapta’s lab, it all started to look a little more familiar. Adora watched as Hordak pressed the code to open the door and even waited for him to give them the okay to come in. 

The lab, of course, was a mess. But Adora knew Entrapta and she knew it’s a very well organized and perfectly placed mess. Every part and piece of scrap scattered across the floor was, no doubt, exactly where Entrapta wanted it. 

They find her standing tall over one of her massive monitors. She’d somehow managed to attach a workbench from the ceiling that hung down over the monitor. She was on her hair, hanging above the screen, tinkering, but as she did, she occasionally lowered herself down enough to see what was displayed before rising back up to work more. 

“They’re here.” Hordak said, his voice trying so hard to be cruel but it was almost like he couldn’t use that tone around Entrapta. 

Adora would find it cute if it wasn’t so damn familiar. “Catra! Adora!” Entrapta cheered, lifting up her face mask as her hair lowered her down to their level. “You’re not here to take over my kingdom again are you?” She directed her questions to Catra. 

“No,” Catra raised her hands in defense. “You’ve got one evil overruler running around her already.” She gestured at Hordak who scoffed at her. 

Entrapta, naturally, looked completely indifferent. “I don’t really know why Hordak would try and take over Dryl. Even if he did I doubt anything would really change around here.”

“Perhaps I would get to push the buttons more when we finish experiments?” Hordak chimed in grumpily as he went back to...whatever he was doing.

“In his dreams!” Entrapta said. “So are you here to see my new experiment?”

Adora wished they were, if only to not disappoint that excited look on Entrapta’s face. “Actually...we...were hoping to try a different kind of experiment.” She glanced over at Catra, she knew this was Catra’s show and she’d told Catra as much. Adora would be here, of course, to support her - but Adora wasn’t going to say anything. “Catra?”

Entrapta refocused on Catra, a spark in her eyes. “Do you want to try the laser pointer experiment again?!” 

“No!” Catra quickly responded. “Entrapta, no.” Adora’s memory was flooded with stories of that red light and how ridiculously enticing it was. Entrapta nearly foiled all of Catra’s plans with that thing. “Entrapta...I…” They knew Hordak was listening. They knew how bad this was going to go over. Catra dove in anyway. “I’m sure you’ve saved a few of Horde Prime’s chips from when he…”

“Controlled the people of Etheria?” Hordak’s voice was deep and intense behind them. Catra didn’t let herself look back. 

She focused on Entrapta who simply nodded at her. “I do. I still have yours, in fact.” 

Adora saw Catra’s hand fly to the back of her neck. She used to do that so much in the months after Prime’s defeat. It didn’t happen nearly as much now. Usually just after nightmares or if Prime’s name would come up in meetings. “I need you to put it back on me. I need to get back in that network.” 

“Are you _mad_?” Hordak was suddenly right behind them. Catra turned quickly, taking a step away from him. At that, Adora took a step forward to stand between the two. “I’ve told Entrapta multiple times to destroy those chips and you want her to reconnect you?” 

“It’s not your decision to make!” Adora shouted, her voice louder than intended. Still, she was equal to Hordak now, if not more. He was not their leader or their ruler or any other domineering names he used to give himself. “We came here to ask Entrapta for help. Beyond that, it’s not your business.” 

“ _She_ is my business.” He looked past Adora at Entrapta, who was giving him the smallest of smiles. 

Adora was not expecting that. 

“That’s why it’s better this way.” Catra said. “Look Hordak. We’re looking for something we can’t find. Something lost in space and we could spend our lives trying to stumble across it, or we could access Prime’s network and see if he has anything on it, and given how powerful it is, I _know_ he does.” Catra was so confident now, Adora loved watching her like this. She always felt like she missed out a little. Yes, she chose the rebellion and left the Horde and yes, it was the right choice - Catra would be the first to admit it. But seeing Catra like this, powerful and in control, it was amazing. “Have you ever heard of Touchstone?” 

The way his eyes narrow and his...eyebrows? Did he have eyebrows? He had bumps where eyebrows might be. Adora wasn’t sure, either way, his eyebrow bumps furrowed and that told her he had no idea. 

Which was a shame cause that would have made all this so much easier. 

“Like a point of balance?” Entrapta spoke up, drawing everyone’s attention. “A touchstone is a landmark of certainty. A center - something that other things are compared to and built from. It has also been mentioned in some First Ones data as a centerpiece of power and creation.”

“Wait, _you’ve_ heard of it?” Adora tried not to fall over as she rushed over to Entrapta who used her hair to keep Adora from hugging her. 

“I’ve heard the word, yes, but I had no idea it was a literal thing! What are you looking for?” 

With that, Adora reached into the bag she’d been carrying at her side and removed the small rock. The power it radiated in her hand was still surreal. Even more so that nobody else felt it. Every time she touched it her fingers felt tingly. 

Before she could say anything, Entrapta snatched the artifact from Adora’s hand with her hair. A moment later, she was using that same hair to pull herself up to one of her machines. 

“Careful! That’s -”

“First Ones tech!” Entrapta shouted, putting into some kind of scanner. “Oh _wow!_ ” She was so excited and so far away with her scans and numbers that none of them could actually see what the heck was going on. “This is remarkable! I’ve never seen anything like this - in all of my wildest imaginings and theories I never could have envisioned something like this.”

“Something like what?!” Catra shouted, frustrated. Adora was so glad Catra was the one to do that. 

Entrapta looked down at them. “I never would have believed it!” 

Adora threw her head back with a groan. “Believed what, Entrapta? We can’t see the data!”

“Yeah, because you know how to read data.” Catra teased and Adora glared at her. 

“Shush,” she looked back up. “Entrapta, please, we need to find this thing soon!”

“Right! Okay! Coming down!” They watched as Entrapta pulled the artifact out of the scanner and made her way back down. She held it out to Adora who took it carefully and again felt that familiar tingle. 

“So what’d the data say?” Catra asked, her ears piqued up with curiosity. 

“Nothing.”

Catra and Adora shared a look. 

“Entrapta, you were freaking out up there.”

“Exactly!” She used her hair to grab and lift both Adora and Catra off the ground. “A First Ones artifact that has no significant readings whatsoever! It’s unheard of!

That didn’t make sense. The data never lied. 

So why did it feel so powerful in Adora’s hand? Why did it double the size of a tree in Perfuma’s kingdom? 

“I don’t understand, how...how are there _no_ readings?” 

Entrapta looked at Adora flatly. “I put it in the scanner and nothing came back.” 

Catra snorted back a laugh and Adora glared at her. “But you have heard of it? The Touchstone?” 

“The word yes, it’s come up a few times in some of my research. I looked up the definitions on my own - for scientific purposes. The research I’ve done doesn’t suggest it being any sort of physical object - it’s just a word I’ve come across. _But!_ ” she said loudly, and made Adora jump. “If it _is_ a physical artifact of the First Ones then the best chance we’d have to locate it would most likely be in Horde Prime’s files!” Entrapta took a step toward Catra and again wrapped her in a hair hug. “I can’t _believe_ I never thought about using the chips to access his data! Once he was defeated and you covered his ship in trees, everything in his system locked down. A fail safe I think, if his ship was ever captured or overthrown. _But_ , if we can access his network from the inside, then we could have it all at our fingertips!” 

“No, no,” Catra shook her head. “You’ll have to find someone else to chip up and download all of his files. I have one file I’m looking for, when I find it, I’m out.”

“Damn right,” Adora said, even though she didn’t really mean to say it out loud. Either way, it made Catra smile and roll her eyes. “Sorry, your thing. I’ll stay quiet.” 

“If this works then I’ll chip myself!” 

Hordak sighed. “You most certainly will not.” Adora was starting to realize that this was the entirety of Hordrak’s life now. Protecting Entrapta from Entrapta. 

The next thing she knew, Catra had pulled up a stool she’d found in the mess of this lab and sat on it. She’d tied up her hair and was holding it over her left shoulder. Adora couldn’t do a whole lot here to help, but she could do that. 

Walking over, she knelt down next to Catra and grabbed her hair, gently keeping it in place. When Catra looked at her, she smiled as best as she could. “I’ll be right here,” she used her other hand to find Catra’s and squeeze it. “Thank you, for this. You...you didn't -”

“I did,” Catra stopped Adora before she could finish. Adora knew Catra didn’t have to do this. It didn’t benefit her in any way, this was Adora’s mess. But Catra was here, like she had been since the Heart of Etheria. At her side, fighting their battles together. “Alright, Entrapta, let’s get this over with.”

“Okay, I’ve managed to power up the chip with a few volts of electricity. It should either reconnect you to Prime’s network or electrocute you and destroy your brain stem.” Catra gasped and Adora glanced up to give Entrapta a _look_. One that even Entrapta could understand. “There is a ninety-seven percent chance it’s the first one!” 

Catra narrowed her eyes and held onto Adora’s hand a little tighter. When Entrapta lowered her mask, she knew there was no going back. Catra closed her eyes as Entrapta started to work. As the chip was being attached, Catra would hiss and jump a little, but not enough to cause any real issue. 

Entrapta mumbled the entire time, most of it Adora couldn’t hear and the rest she couldn’t really understand. 

“Ah!” Catra cried and Adora nearly fell over. There were jolts of electricity at the back of her neck. 

“Entrapta!” 

“Almost there! Keep her still!” 

Adora was torn between making Entrapta stop and picking up Catra and running out of here. But she knew that if this didn't work, Catra would make them try again. She was determined to do this and there was no stopping that. 

So instead, Adora pressed her forehead into Catra’s shoulder and held her tightly. “Breath, Catra, breathe...you’ve got this.” 

As Entrapta continued to work, Catra grimaced and shook in Adora’s grip. She was struggling to catch her breath, no doubt feeling a tremendous shock - if this went on much longer Adora _would_ put a stop to it. 

Fortunately, the sharp buzzing of Entrapta’s equipment stopped and Catra exhaled the breath she’d been holding. She was sweating and trembling, but the pain seemed to have gone away. 

“Done!” Entrapta cheered, pushing her mask up. “You should…”

Catra stiffened in Adora’s arms, her spine straightening and her head falling back. It lasted only a moment, but the jerky, unnatural movement of her body terrified Adora. 

When she resettled, her eyes opened, the same color they’d been before. Not the glowing green of Prime’s control, just the beautiful dual shades they always were. 

“Hey,” Adora said, not caring that Entrapta and Hordak were in the room. “You okay?” 

She nodded slowly. “Wh-who’s dumb idea was this?” Adora laughed, almost like a relief, Catra was still Catra. “I feel it,” she said, her voice trembling. “It’s all still there…the...the network. It’s quiet but...not empty.” 

“Can you navigate it?” 

Catra nodded. “It’s just...a lot - and the worst kind of familiar.” Adora didn’t press, she couldn’t begin to understand what Catra was going through. She’d only seen touches of Horde Prime’s manipulation. The visions she’d had as she struggled to reach the heart. The way he infiltrated her ideal future and tried to strip it away. 

Catra had been locked away in his thralls for days, a prisoner in her own body. 

“Search for things he feared.” Hordak said, and when Adora looked up he was still watching them from a distance. “Horde Prime boasted about his victories, but She-ra was a threat to him for a reason. Her power was more than he could handle. So he avoided it and ran from it - among other things. If this Touchstone is any part of that, he no doubt kept a record of it.” 

With her eyes still closed, Catra sat and searched. Adora had no idea what to do with herself other than sit and wait and hold her. 

“I see it.” Catra’s eyes were moving under their lids, like she was dreaming. “Touchstone, it’s...a source of power and creation and... _sacrifice_.” She took a slow breath. “Prime wanted it, he wanted the power and what it could create but he was also...afraid of it. He...he didn’t understand it.”

“Like magic?” Adora asked and Catra nodded once. 

“I...I see a wall. A giant wall with a door and there are…” Catra winced. “Bodies.” Her hands started to shake. “Just bodies stacked on top of each other...so many. They held their ground, they fought…they protected it.” 

“Where?” Adora asked, unable to control herself. 

Catra swallowed thickly, she was sweating. “Tyr Nova.” She whispered. “No...no no…” She opened her eyes and found Adora. “The planet is called Tyr Nova! He tried to take it over on his own but he couldn’t. The First Ones converged there, a massive amount of force and protected it. When they realized he wouldn’t stop, they…they destroyed it.”

Adora’s heart was thumping in her chest. “Who destroyed it? The First Ones?” 

“Like...a failsafe.”

“The Touchstone is where...She-ra’s sword was made. It’s where her power came from.” Adora felt her heart sinking deep into her stomach. She felt sick. “It’s where they created her.”

“And it’s gone?” 

Catra’s face answered the question. “I’m sorry,” 

The power was...gone? Adora had never considered She-ra’s creation before. It was just something that had fallen into her lap. Yes, she knew _why_ the First Ones created She-ra, but never actually thought about the way it was done. 

To think now that it could never be done again, why did that make her so sad? Wasn’t it simply giving her what she’d secretly wanted? The chance to be free, to just be Adora - for the first time in her life. 

She wouldn’t be Shadow Weaver’s prize, or Hordak’s prodigy, not the Force Captain or the Princess Alliance’s secret weapon - just Adora. 

She’d never been that before...and now it seemed like her only option. 

“Adora,” Catra’s voice brought her back to the moment. The very real moment of Catra currently wearing one of Horde Prime’s chips. “I want to want take this off.”

“Of course, Entrapta you can…”

“On it! I’ve been taking readings of your vitals and your heart rate is extremely elevated, not to mention your blood pressure has skyrocketed. If we left it on any longer you very well might have gone into cardiac arrest.” The entire time Entrapta was talking, she was working and removing the chip was a much simpler process since they weren’t on a ship that was currently being attacked like last time. 

Still, Catra was clearly worse for wear and the guilt hit Adora hard. She put herself through all of this and for nothing. To find out the thing they wanted was gone long ago. 

Once the chip was successfully removed, Catra was practically slumping in Adora’s arms. She could feel Catra’s pulse pounding in her wrist as she held her arm - her breathing ragged. “She needs to lie down,” Adora said, standing up and lifting Catra as well. For a moment, she thought about picking Catra up, but she wasn’t sure if her body was ready and it wouldn’t do any of them any good to fall over. 

Instead, the two of them stumbled as the rose to their feet, Adora trying her best to keep them upright. 

“M’fine…” Catra said, sounding very not fine. 

“Here,” Hordak said, and there was a suddenly sharp sound of metal scraping across metal. When Adora looked to him, he was dragging a bench across the floor. It was clear of any parts and gadgets by the time it reached them. No doubt it was hard and freezing cold, but Catra needed to rest. 

Carefully, Adora guided her over and laid her down. She hissed at the cool metal on her shoulder, but her body was worn down from the anxiety of being chipped and whatever that process felt like. 

Adora’s hand made its way into Catra’s hair, she stroked it softly, trying to calm her. She felt miserable, even though it was Catra’s idea, she did it for Adora. She put herself through that for Adora.

That was another trauma for another time, right now, Adora’s main focus was Catra. She’d deal with the confusing and devastating loss of She-ra and what it meant for her well-being another time. 

“You’re amazing,” Adora said, not caring that Hordak was right there. 

Catra looked up at her. “You always say these things, idiot.” Adora smiled. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, we’ll...figure it out.” 

“Might I suggest you not give up so quickly.” Hordak spoke quieter than before, his tone still deep and annoyed, but steadier. “What makes you so certain that everything you found is true.” 

Adora narrowed her eyes at him. “Why would his memories lie?”

“Would he not alter his memories if he could? Anything to make his... _brother’s_ believe him infallible. Is that not something he’s done before?” 

There was a pause, then Catra spoke. “Krytis.”

“His weakness…” Adora felt that painful feeling of hope rise in her chest. “If...if he couldn’t conquer Tyr Nova then of course he’d make up some reason why they shouldn’t go back. He couldn’t fail in the eyes of his clones.” 

“It is not a certainty, but to give up at this seems very...unlike you.” Hordak sneered, despite his words. “Perhaps if you had in our war the end result might have been different.” 

Catra laughed, though it clearly pained her. “C’mon, Hordak. You and I both know we weren’t winning that one.” Hordak glared at them and walked away, but his words lingered. 

Adora knelt down next to Catra, putting her chin on the metal bench to close the distance between them. “Did you find the location of this planet?” Catra nodded slowly. “Okay. Thank you.” 

“Oh Adora, shut up,” Catra said with a soft smile as her eyes closed. “Give me a few minutes and….and we’ll go home and figure out what to do next.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not gonna lie, no idea if there is any sort of canon explanation about where She-ra's power came from. Hopefully this isn't too out there. Thanks for reading!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who has read and supported this story - we're getting close to the finish line. Just a few more chapters to go. Any comments and feedback are greatly appreciated as always :)
> 
> Also just a heads up, the beginning of this chapter is a little dark

Adora looked so small. So weak and helpless. 

A strange position for her. A whisper in the back of Catra’s mind told her it was wrong. That Adora should never look this way. 

Then why had she worked so hard to put Adora here? To drop her to her knees - tie her hands above her head and  _ defeat _ her like this?

“Excellent,” a voice whispered in her ear and suddenly Catra remembered. 

It was his will. 

Catra took a step towards Adora. She was crying, scratches all along her face. She’d fought hard, desperate - like someone who knew they were going to lose and gave everything they had to survive. 

Now she was here, utterly destroyed and ready. She was ready and Catra would do his will and finish it. 

Then she would be free. 

“Hello, Adora,” she said, kneeling down in front of this girl who had been at the forefront of her heart for longer than Catra could possibly remember. Adora’s bottom lip was shaking, her eyes were a fading blue, almost grey and her shoulders were shaking. 

“Catra, please,” she begged, her voice breaking. It made Catra’s body hum with something...wrong. Something that didn’t belong. No, this was her destiny, her victory. Finally. “Catra, I don’t want to die. Please. I don’t want to.” 

Reaching out, Catra traced her thumb along Adora’s cheek. Before, the idea of doing this filled Catra’s dreams and thoughts with joy and pain and  _ regret _ . Now, they were simply a farewell. Her life could finally begin soon. She could be free and at peace with Prime. Away from Adora’s torment. 

“It will be over soon. I’ll finally let you go.”

“No,” Adora sobbed, Catra had never heard her cry like this - so desperate. “I’m s-scared.” 

It hurt, why did it hurt so much? This was what she wanted. Prime was giving her everything she wanted. The end of Adora. The chance to right a wrong, the greatest wrong of her life. Believing that Adora would care about her and accept her and...love her. Instead, Adora left and Catra’s only companion was suffering and pain. No matter how hard she tried to dig out of it, the hole only grew deeper. 

But as she crouched down, looking into Adora’s eyes, she could hear a scream in the back of her lungs. Telling her to stop. Telling her this was wrong. This wasn’t what she wanted, this wasn’t - 

“Little Sister,” the scream died in her throat, an echo now...fading away. “It is time.” 

Catra reached out, wrapping her hand around Adora’s throat, her claws extended, sinking into her skin. Adora gasped and her eyes went wide. She looked at Catra, terror and pain battling for supremacy in her expression. 

“I’m sorry,”

Catra woke up, shrouded in darkness with a scream in the back of her throat. She reached for the back of her neck immediately. 

No chip, no control. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, like it might just burst right out of it. Her body was shaking, she felt like she was suffocating. 

She reached, blindly, and was met with a warm soft body next to her. She squeezed, unsure of what part she was touching, and shook Adora awake. 

“S’wrong?” Adora’s voice washed over her like a wave of relief. but Catra couldn’t find her voice. “Catra?” She was louder now, shifting beside her. Suddenly, that warm feeling was on her shoulders, holding her, Catra leaned into it. “Hey, hey...it’s okay,” Adora pulled Catra into her arms, the safest place in the world. 

Catra fell into Adora’s chest, begging her heart to slow down and for the fogginess in her mind to fade. She wanted to say something, anything, but she knew if she tried to speak it would only be a sob. 

So she said nothing, for a long time, she stayed silent and let Adora rock her back and forth. 

Her hands clung to Adora’s shirt, the same shirt she was staining with sweat and probably tears. 

Mercifully, Catra felt herself starting to relax. It was just a dream, she knew that, she knew it because she’d had dreams like that before - it had just been a long time. She never remembered them being so vivid.

She never remembered Adora...begging like that. 

A sob finally escaped and Catra shook her head. “Adora,” she whispered, needing to say her name. 

She felt herself being pulled up slowly, finding Adora’s eyes. Adora wasn’t even looking directly at her, how could she in the dark like this. 

Still, she was searching, hunting for Catra, and when she finally found her, Adora smiled. “I’m here,” she said. “I’m right here.” Catra put her arms around Adora’s neck and hugged her. “Easy,” she said and Catra remembered Adora’s wounds. She went to pull away, but Adora stopped her. “I’ve got you, we’re okay.” She ran circles across Catra’s back. “Must have been a bad one,” she said and Catra could only nod. “You want to talk about it?” 

Catra shook her head, but she knew she had to say  _ something _ . She didn't want Adora to think she was pushing her away. “Too sad, not important,” she said, her voice strained. “You’re here, that’s…” 

All that matters. 

“I am,” Adora pulled back a bit and smiled. “Will you answer one thing for me?” Catra already knew where this was going, but she nodded anyway. “Was it...about him?” She didn’t answer, but that was answer enough. Adora sighed and leaned forward, resting her forehead against Catra’s. 

She didn’t apologize, even though Catra was prepared for it and prepared to tell her she didn’t need to. Instead, things were quiet again, long enough that by the time either one of them even moved again, Catra had calmed down enough to think clearly and focus. 

The details of the dream had all but faded - even if the way it made her feel would probably linger for days. 

“I’ll stop,” Adora said, her voice hardly carrying between them. “Right now, I’ll...I’ll stop. I’ll let She-ra go and we can move on.” 

Oh gods how much Catra loved her. The world had only really given Catra one good thing in her miserable life, but that one thing was pretty damn good. 

Still, she knew it couldn’t be that easy. “Adora, I won’t ask you to do that.”

“You’re not, I’m saying it,” she was trying so hard to sound certain. But her voice kept breaking up. “I don’t need any of it, I only need you.” 

It was strange to hear Adora say these things, strange in an almost funny kind of way. If Adora had said this eight years ago, then everything might have been different. But she didn’t, and she was right not to. 

“I won’t make you choose between me and She-ra.” 

“You’re not!” Adora was getting frustrated, it happened when Catra wouldn’t let her win. 

But Catra knew better. “This isn’t what you want, Adora. Your heart's too big to quit. You’re not that person, and I wouldn’t want you to become that person for me.” 

“You did all this for me today, If I hadn’t…”

“Stop,” Catra was firm but gentle, a tone she’d learned from Glimmer. “You don’t get to take credit for my dumb idea.” 

“I was trying to take the blame,” Adora said, in a very serious tone. 

Catra laughed. “It’s only blame if it doesn’t work. It’s just dumb if it’s successful.” Adora pouted, but didn’t say anything, so Catra pressed on. “We have to try, I won’t let you not try. We’ll go to those coordinates I found, we’ll look and we’ll see what we can do.”

“Catra, I don’t need it. I just want you and all those things I told you about -”

“While drunk,” 

Adora glared at her, but nodded. “While  _ drunk _ . But that just helped me say what I want. She-ra is - yes, there’s a responsibility and it’s important, but it’s put us through so much, why can’t I let it go?”

“You can,” Catra said simply, grabbing Adora’s hands. “If we get there and you can bring her back or...fix her or...whatever - if you can and you decide not to, then I’ll support you. If you get there and you decide that you want to be She-ra again and keep fighting and keep saving this universe, then I’ll support that too.” Adora was looking at her, intently, as the light from the moon had found a gap in their curtains, splashing the room with a silver glow. “But I won’t let you live with a what if. I don’t want to walk outside one morning, on our big farm, with two kids in my arms.”

“ _ Two _ kids?” 

Catra shrugged. “Or one, or seven, or just a bunch of cows.” Adora laughed, a beautiful sound. “Whatever it is, I don’t want to find you on our farm one day, and see regret in your eyes. I don’t want you laying awake at night wondering if you made the right choice or if you should have tried harder.” 

When Adora didn’t immediately argue, Catra knew her point had been made. She also knew that she was exhausted but would also not be able to go back to sleep. 

“You want to go steal some ice cream from the kitchen?” 

Catra smiled. “Absolutely.” 

* * *

Space missions were pretty fun. Catra wouldn’t deny that. The chance to jump into the darkness of space and leave all the troubles of Etheria behind was never not welcome. Especially when she wasn’t on board the ship of an evil dictator. 

On the other hand,  _ packing _ for space missions was the absolute worst. 

Especially with Adora and her countless number of star charts and maps. 

Truth be told, finding the coordinates had become Adora’s obsession. It wasn’t even because of She-ra, not entirely, it was mostly just because Adora loved mapping space. When they first went on their missions to find and spread magic across the universe, Adora would stay up for hours watching the sky, using pencil and notebook to trace the stars she saw. 

Catra woke up more than once to an empty bed, only to find Adora sitting up against one of the ship’s windows, drawing in her book - tongue out and everything. 

It was cute and endearing and it was fun to see Adora so excited, but there was no room for Catra’s clothes in their bag. 

“Adora, if we’re not going to that part of space, do we really need the star book about it?”

From her spot in the closet, Adora peeked her head up over a box of old clothes that she refused to throw away. “But what if we have to go there to get where we’re going?”

Catra sighed. “That doesn’t even make sense, Adora. We’ve got Entrapta with us and your ship has its own navigation system.”

“No, it’s She-ra’s ship, it might not even listen to me now.”

That was ridiculous. “That’s ridiculous. You’re still you, it will still recognize your voice.” Adora didn’t say anything. It was almost like Adora wanted the ship to not recognize her so she could use her silly charts. “I don’t have anywhere to put my clothes.” 

“Okay,” Adora pouted like a big baby. “We could always bring a second bag!” 

“You’re doing that thing again.” Catra said, trying to be gentle. Adora was over preparing, a  _ bad _ habit. “We’re gonna be okay. We’ve escaped worse with less. We know where we’re going. Darla will get us to the right system and Entrapta will make sure the ship doesn’t fall apart. You just have to focus on being the leader and being cute.” 

“Oh is that all? No She-ra so now I’m just a pretty face?” 

Catra shugged. “You are nice to look at.” Adora hit her with a pair of pants. Catra wasn’t even sure who’s pants they were. 

“Fine, I’ll leave a few charts behind. I wanna take the new one though, to chart the stars where we go.”

“Of course, who needs sleep when you can stare up at space all night and then be a disaster the next day.”

“Exactly!” Adora threw her arms in the air before pulling out their bag and deciding which chart books she wanted to leave behind. 

“I’m gonna go check on Sparkles and Arrow Boy, you get this all sorted out and we should be about ready to go.” 

Thankfully, when Catra found her way to Bow and Glimmer’s room, they seemed much more put together. They had two bags, albeit a little big, and they were loaded and ready for tomorrow’s journey. 

“So, how’s it going?” Bow asked, a knowing tone in his voice. 

Catra exhaled slowly. “We’re...getting there.” 

“I love Adora, but planning trips with her is a nightmare.” Glimmer chimed in as she reentered the room. “Entrapta seems ready to go, apparently Hector is coming with us.” 

“Who the heck is...Hector?” Catra hated that sentence.

“Wrong Hordak...that’s...his new name. Hector.”

Catra looked at Bow, who seemed entirely indifferent, then back to Glimmer who simply shrugged. “Come on, who gave the poor guy  _ that _ name? It’s not bad enough he’s a Prime clone, but we have to name him Hector!” 

“Apparently he chose it.” Of course he did. “Either way, he’ll be with us, helping keep things together - probably cooking and cleaning too. He’s apparently been bored in Dryl because Entrapta and Hordak hardly ever leave the lab so there’s nothing for him to do.”

“So long as he makes us real food and not tiny food, I’m fine with it.” 

After a while it became obvious that Adora had lost herself in more packing and was going to be late for lunch, so they started without her. 

Bow was busy with his trackpad, contacting everyone around Etheria to let them know what was happening. When the Best Friend Squad went on missions like this, everyone had to know because so much of what happened here went through the four of them. 

Having King Micah around helped, but more often than not lately, the decisions went through Glimmer and her team. 

Yes, Catra of the Horde was now a proud member of Princess’ Sparkles team. So long as they didn't make her wear pink, she’d be happy with it. 

“Okay, so Frosta is going to come while we’re gone and help your dad in locating that...thing Adora found in the woods the other day.”

“She’s coming all the way here for that?” 

Bow nodded. “It’s apparently her birthday present to herself. She wants to fight big monsters and...we have big monsters.” 

“Huh, go Frosta,” Catra took another bite of her chicken. It was  _ not _ as good as Mystacor fish. “Your dads found anything else out about this place we’re going?” 

“No,” Bow lingered on the word for a while, sounding exhausted. Clearly this was a long conversation he’d had with them. “They do want us to make sure we take notes on everything we see. And by us, I mean  _ me _ .”

“You could ask Adora,” Glimmer said but Catra was quick to stomp that out. 

“Please no, she’s already going to be busy enough with her little star charts. She doesn’t need to be documenting new planets too.” It was then that Catra realized she was almost done eating and still hadn’t seen Adora. “I swear, if she’s started packing another suitcase, I’m gonna lose it.” 

Catra doesn’t lose it, but when she returned and found Adora at the table in their room with about four books open and a map on a little white board behind her all drawn out and detailed, Catra knew her plan of attack wasn’t going to work. 

So instead, she took the time to help Adora plot out their trip as best she could. They had a general idea of where they were going, Entrapta would know better and Darla would be the one to get them there, but Adora needed to know, needed to plan ahead - so Catra let her. Helping where she could.

Falling asleep that night was harder than Catra had expected. Not because of nightmares, though maybe the fear of them still lingered, but because Adora was restless. She kept tossing and turning, pushing the blankets off of her only to pull them back up a few minutes later. 

“Alright,” Catra groaned, sitting up in bed. 

Adora had the audacity to look at her like she hadn’t just been kicking off the blankets like a toddler. “Everything okay?”

“Adora, stop, you’re a mess and you’re not sleeping and when you don’t sleep, I don’t sleep.”

A deep frown settled on Adora’s face, adorable dork. “Sorry, my head is all over the place.”

“I know, so we’re going to fix it.”

“With cake?!” 

Catra rolled her eyes. “Yes, because a huge amount of sugar would totally help you sleep.” Catra climbed out of bed, she was tired, but not so much that she couldn’t do this. “Come on, we’re gonna burn off some of that energy.”

“Oh?” Adora’s eyebrows raised. 

“Not like that.”

“Oh…”

Catra’s night just kept getting longer. “Maybe like that,  _ after _ .”

Adora was quick to climb out of bed with Catra, her hair bouncing around her head as she moved. It had been a while since Adora had worked herself up this much. 

It took Catra about two minutes to change out of her pajamas and into clothes better suited for sparring. When she stepped out of the closet and Adora saw her, her eyes lit up. 

“Are we gonna fight?!” 

“Low impact sparring, yes.” Catra cracked her neck. “Just enough for me to kick your ass a little and make you go to sleep.”

“Ugh, I love you so much,” Adora kissed her, which was like a secret weapon that only Adora had access to. 

Honestly, if Adora had just kissed her in Thaymor then the war may have ended in that moment. 

Sparring with Adora was a challenge for Catra when they first started doing it in Bright Moon. So often when Catra fought against her in the Horde, Adora was stronger, but Catra’s speed was enough to even the fight. 

When she fought against She-ra during the war, Catra fought dirty. She cheated and tricked and more often than not, her tactic was to run and avoid and distract. To captivate She-ra’s attention, which was usually very easy and should have been very telling - but back then they were both idiots. 

Now though, she couldn’t cheat, and Adora was a  _ lot _ stronger than she used to be. Even now, after her injury, Adora at 60% was better than most people’s 100%. 

So Catra changed her tactic. She had one very simple one, she had to stay low. She had to go after Adora’s legs and try and keep her off balance. Adora was a warrior and a fighter, but she had never been the most graceful person in Etheria. 

Her strikes were quick, and even when Adroa knew they were coming, Catra was still fast enough to keep her shaky. 

Adora kept her stance broad, her legs wide. When Catra rushed her, she would try and grab and pull. Reaching for Catra and barely missing. Jumping just enough out of the way to keep herself steady. 

If Catra could get her off balance, she could pounce. On the flip side, if Adora got her hands on her, it was game over. 

Back and forth they went, Catra lost track of time, but the sweat that built up on the back of her neck told her how long they’d been going. 

When Catra had her best chance, a late move from Adora and a good lung from Catra, she wrapped her arms around Adora’s front leg, holding on tight and swinging her momentum under Adora. She wanted to topple her over, but Adora leaned forward, pressing her hands into the mat for balance and all of Catra’s momentum died. 

Yeah, Adora was still insanely strong at 60%. 

When Adora suddenly twisted and fell on her back, Catra was confused, she felt very in control - until she wasn’t. 

Adora’s legs grapevined around Catra’s waist and she was being pulled down. She reacted quickly, grabbing onto Adora’s arm and twisting it, trying to regain control. She had a good grip, but Adora’s legs were so strong and they practically lifted Catra off her feet. She squealed, immediately with no control and when she reached out with her hands, Adora laced her fingers through Catra’s and held her up.

Now they were face to face, Catra completely trapped in Adora’s limbs, staring down at the big goof and her big goofy smile. 

“Are you done?” Catra glared, Adora was just teasing her. “I thought you were injured.” 

Adora’s smile grew. “I’m feeling a little better.”

“You gonna keep me up here all night?” Catra wasn’t fighting too hard to escape, but she really wasn’t sure if she could. 

Adora shrugged and then slowly started to lower Catra down like a bench press, and when she was close enough, Adora leaned her head up and kissed her on the nose. 

“Adora!” Catra shouted, she was being manhandled here and it was equally embarrassing and ridiculously hot. “Will you stop!” Catra started to squirm a bit in her defeated position and graciously, Adora brought her down gently and pulled Catra into her arms. “You’re the worst.” She pouted, but let herself be held regardless. 

It was warm, for a lot of reasons, but mostly they were both sweaty and gross and the air in the training room was thick. 

Catra could hear Adora’s heart beating steadily, the most comforting sound on Etheria. She settled in a little deeper and stayed steady, feeling Adora’s hand running slow circles on her back. 

“Thank you for this.” Adora whispered, the vibration of her voice coursed through Catra’s body. 

“For what? Letting you kick my ass?” 

Adora laughed. “Hey, you did good! You’re very annoying to fight against.” 

“Oh good, the once feared leader of the Horde’s forces is now just...annoying.” Catra had no malice in her voice. “You wanna tell me what’s going on in that head of yours today?” Adora didn’t answer for a while, long enough that Catra had to speak again. “Come on,” she pushed up a bit, finding Adora’s eyes - filled with guilt. “Whatever you tell me, I’ll listen.” 

“I just feel so conflicted, like...selfish. I - I…” Adora sighed and looked away from Catra. “It’s like I kind of hope that we don’t find anything in Tyr Nova and that just makes me feel so awful. I have this great destiny. This purpose that I have fought for and worked for and I just want to throw it all away? It feels wrong but...I’m so tired, Catra.” Adora’s voice trailed off, she swallowed sharply and shook her head, as if she were ashamed of herself. Catra had a thousand things ready to say - a list of platitudes and speech points to make her feel better. But Adora spoke first. “I don’t want to die before we get to really live.” 

Then suddenly, it was as if Catra’s biggest fear was laid out in front of her. Being alone, the idea of losing Adora now was crippling, like losing a limb or a half of her heart. Something that would be irreplaceable. She couldn’t imagine a future without Adora, the thought didn’t even register properly. Waking up every morning and not having her be around would be equal to the sun never rising again. 

Adora had done so much to help Catra learn how to be empathetic and compassionate. To care and open herself up to others. To love. She’d given Catra a chance to start over. 

Maybe now, it was Catra’s turn to help Adora do the same. 

“Then don’t,” Catra said, not one bit of hesitance in her voice. “Adora, I said it and I meant it when I told you I would support you no matter what happens in Tyr Nova and we...we don’t know what will happen. If this place is still out there and if it can somehow, magically bring She-ra back. If you decided that, then I would support you and love you and  _ be there _ .” It was now or never. They wouldn’t have a moment’s peace till Tyr Nova after tonight. “But, if I’m being completely honest...I’m rooting for Adora.” Now it was Catra’s turn to feel guilty. “I know what She-ra means to Etheria, to the Princess Alliance and...to you.” Her throat was tight, her eyes burned - but she pressed on. “But I want to start a family with you, Adora. A life that belongs to us...and I can’t do that if you’re not here.”

Before Catra could fully comprehend that she’d said all those things out loud, Adora was kissing her. It was soft and wet with Catra’s tears, but it grounded her. 

When they broke apart, Adora’s eyes were crinkled with a smile. “Okay,” she said, with the softest of nods. “Then I choose you.” 

“It’s not about me…”

“I know,” Adora said, matter-of-factly. “It’s my choice. It’s my - our - future and that’s my choice. Us.” Catra’s heart swelled, she almost didn’t want to believe it. “We’ll go to Tyr Nova, we’ll see if it truly exists, and I’ll see what’s there and see what can be done about She-ra, but...I won’t accept it for myself. If I can give that destiny to someone else, I will, but if not...then that will be it.” Adora’s face held no doubt, it was soft and happy. “You asked me a long time ago what I wanted...this is it. This is what I want. You.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I want to apologize, obviously, for sort of abandoning this story for a few months. Truth is, this chapter and the one after it had been written for a while, but I just wasn't happy with the content and the endings and I wanted to leave the story on a more positive note while I sorted things out. 
> 
> I feel like I have, I'm ready to finish this story and could even consider a sequel if people are interested because naturally, when the ending idea came to me it was accompanied by a dozen or so other ideas lol. 
> 
> Anyway, let's finish this thing up huh? Sorry again for the wait :)

Adora was suddenly beginning to question her decision to wait to tell Bow and Glimmer about her choice until after they were on the ship. At least if they reacted badly, they could leave and wouldn’t be confined to this tiny little space for the next three weeks. 

Instead, Adora let her nerves get the better of her and now she was standing outside their section of the ship with her hands wringing together. 

Glimmer and Bow were her best friends. They were the people that helped her find her place in the world and accepted her when she’d ran away from all she’d ever known. If it wasn’t for them, Adora wouldn’t have survived so much, she certainly wouldn’t have been able to open herself up enough to accept the love that was eventually given to her. 

She loved them. They were her family, along with Catra, Bow and Glimmer were her true family. 

So now, standing outside their door aboard Mara’s ship, Adora was terrified they would hate her for this. 

The entire time Adora spent with Glimmer and Bow, it was a constant internal battle to convince herself that she mattered to them, to everyone, beyond She-ra. They were fighting a war, and if it wasn’t for Adora’s magical ability to turn into a ten foot tall warrior, she was useless. 

No matter how many times they told her they loved her. Or cared about her well being over the mission or stuck by her side when She-ra was gone - it was never like this. It was never her  _ choice _ to move on. Would they feel betrayed? Angry? Disappointed? Would they stop...loving her?

“No,” Adora told herself, Catra’s voice ringing in her ears. “No, they won’t.” 

She had to believe it, because she wasn’t sure she could handle it any other way. 

Adora knocked three times, her hands shaking as she did. 

When the door opened, Glimmer was there - a big smile on her face. “Just the person I wanted to see!” Glimmer practically dragged her into the room. “I need you to help me win an argument.”

“It’s not an argument!” Bow defended, throwing his hands in the air. “I just don’t think putting the bed directly under the giant space window is a good idea.” 

“We’d get to sleep under the stars every night!”

Bow sighed, “and if we crash into one then we’ll die instantly.”

“If we crash into a star we’re dead no matter what.”

“Not true! It might just damage the hull! Give us time to escape. If it hits our  _ window _ , we’ll be vacuumed into space!” 

Adora pinched the bridge of her nose as they went back and forth. Yes, this was her family and yes she loved them, but they could be so exhausting. “Guys…”

“Bow, we can sleep under the stars! Literally! How romantic is that?!” 

“What if a ship passes by and sees us. They can look in our window and see everything we do!”

“Oh, afraid they might see you in your fluffy bunny pajamas?”

Bow gasped, actually gasped. “You gave those to me!” 

“Guys,” Adora tried again. They were so glad to see her to settle this argument and had seemingly forgotten she was here.

“You look really cute in them!” 

“I know! But they’re too hot! I don’t wear them because they're too hot!” 

“Okay, but in space it’s not that hot, in fact, it’s kinda cold. So you can totally wear them.” 

Then suddenly Bow was smiling, like the argument from before had vanished. “Oh I absolutely will, I know you like to cuddle this bunny.” He winked at her and Glimmer laughed sweetly and Adora wanted to jump out of the giant window into the empty void of space. 

“Guys!” Adora raised her voice and they jumped. “Hi,” she said when they looked at her finally. 

“Sorry,” Glimmer apologized. “What’s up, Adora? Catra kick you out already?” 

Adora rolled her eyes. “No, although I guess kinda...she...she’s the one who made me do this now instead of sitting in my room stressing about it.”

Bow took a step towards her. “That sounds kind of important.” 

Now they were looking at her and it was real and she was honestly going to tell them this. It was terrifying. Her mind played a dozen different scenarios - the most prominent of which being them telling her she had to leave Bright Moon and that they were disgusted and disappointed in her selfishness. 

_ Come on, Adora. You can do this. _

“It...it is important. Really important.” Adora sat down on their bed that was currently under the window but may not be later. She didn’t know who won that argument. That didn’t matter. She was just really scared. “I um…” she took a breath and then there was a weight on the bed next to her. 

Glimmer was there, like always. Hand on her shoulder and comfort in her eyes. “What’s going on?” 

“I made a decision last night, with Catra.” Adora really wished Catra was here, but Catra knew this was something she had to do on her own. “A big one, about She-ra.” Saying the name hurt. The weight, the responsibility, the  _ purpose _ behind that name was the foundation of everything Adora had now. Of the life she’d found outside of the Horde and the childhood that was so brutal, she barely survived it. But she wanted so much more than that now, things she couldn’t have with that burden. “I don’t want to be She-ra anymore,” she said. She couldn't look at them, just stared at her hands as they white knuckled with the grip she had on her pants. “When we find Tyr Nova... _ if _ we find it. No matter what, I - I’ve  _ chosen _ to give it up. To give her up. To just be...me.” She was crying now, she couldn’t help it. All the stress had overwhelmed her. “I’m sorry if that’s not enough. I’m sorry if...I’ve disappointed you. After all we’ve been through I just...I can’t do it anymore.” 

The words hung in the air, like a heavy rain cloud looming over them. It was so quiet in this ship sometimes. Usually, that quiet and that peace was something Adora loved and lost herself in. Right now though, the silence was deafening - she was preparing herself for the inevitable string of disappointment and disgust that was surely coming. 

When Glimmer’s hand fell from her shoulder and she stood up, Adora’s heart sank. Before Adora could register how much her heart was breaking, Glimmer’s hands found their way to her cheeks, practically crushing her face. Adora’s eyes were forced up, to look at Glimmer, who had a big smile on her face. 

“I think Catra was onto something by calling you an idiot.” Adora could only furrow her brow, her face too squished to speak. “You can’t seriously think we’re disappointed in you?” 

Adora could only shrug, Glimmer let her face go so she could talk. “I just...don’t want you to think I’m quitting on you or the alliance.” 

“Adora, the Princess Alliance is as strong as it has ever been. That’s because of you!” Bow spoke this time, his whole body animated.

“That was She-ra though. Her strength and her -” 

“No,” Glimmer cut her off. She and Catra both were good at that. “Maybe She-ra gave you the strength and the magic to do those things, but  _ Adora _ was the one making all the choices and taking all the risks. We watched, for years, as you went through so much and tried so hard to carry it all on your own.” Something changed in Glimmer’s expression, she was almost angry and Adora was frozen in place watching her. “Do you remember when we were going to the Heart of Etheria?” Adora nodded slowly. “And do you remember when you kept Bow and I back and went on your own?” Now she winced, but still nodded. “If I had the chance in that moment to erase She-ra from you and take you out of that, I would have done it. Watching you...say goodbye to us because you thought you were going to die was terrifying.” 

“Oh, I remember that!” Bow said, a bit too loudly. “Yeah, I’m with Glimmer. That would have been it. That sucked.” 

“It did suck, big time. So yeah, no more She-ra is fine with me if it’s your choice and it makes you happy. Because I am fully on board with keeping Adora safe.” 

“Agreed,” Bow threw an arm around her. “Plus we could still make you a really cool new weapon and maybe stuff your shoes so you’re taller.”

“Bow,” Adora shoved him with a laugh but there were tears in her eyes. “You guys...I...I love you so much.” 

“And we love you,” Bow squeezed her shoulder. “You should have figured that out when we went to all that trouble to save Catra for you after she literally tried to kill us like a dozen times.” 

“I’m going to tell her you said that.” 

“No! No...you’re not. I’m not about to be on Catra’s bad side again for another two weeks. After the helmet fiasco.”

Oh the helmet fiasco. Adora remembered it fondly. Bow showed up on a random mission, their last group mission in space before this one, with a helmet that had bear ears because he wanted to match with Catra. 

It went over as well as could be expected.

* * *

Night came fast but Adora felt good. Dinner was fun, the games they played afterwards were better. It was easy to get lost in the company of people she loved.

As she and Catra made their way to their quarters, Adora had a goofy smile on her face. She’s held Catra’s hand, letting herself be dragged away. She wanted to keep playing, but Catra told her she needed to sleep. 

She did, she was tired, but she didn’t want the night to end. Catra looked really pretty, her hair all tied up and messy in her ponytail. She was wearing a snug red top and a pair of matching shorts. Her feet completely uncovered up to the knee. 

After all this time, she still had that effect on Adora.

Stepping into the room, Catra dragged Adora in, then kicked the door shut with her foot. Adora stayed put and waited for Catra to guide her again. She did, of course, Catra liked to take the lead and Adora didn’t mind. 

“Bow’s game is fun.” Adora said, watching as Catra pulled the blankets down. 

“Yeah, too bad he’s terrible at it.” She said, turning back to face Adora. “Off,” she gestures at Adora. “Shirt, pants, it’s bedtime.” 

“Catra…” Adora smiled. “This is not how I imagined the second part of this night going.”

Catra blushed. It was so faint and she turned away so fast that Adora barely saw it, but it was there and Adora fell harder. “Shut up, you need sleep.” To make her point, Catra took off her own shirt, now wearing a black tank top. 

Adora could only stare, her argument forgotten. This may not be headed anywhere too crazy, but Catra was inviting her to bed looking like...that, who was she to argue?

Quickly, her shirt came off, only getting stuck a little on her ponytail. She decided to take that out along the way and that caused a mess of hair to fall in her face. When she was finally free, she saw Catra looking at her, fighting off a laugh and rolling her eyes. 

“You’re a mess,” she said, reaching out and pushing hair out of Adroa’s face. 

That goofy smile came back. “Your mess.” She teased and Catra sighed. 

“So it would seem. Now, get in bed.” 

Adora whined, she wasn’t sure why. “I’m not tired though.”

“That’s a load of crap,” Catra grabbed her by the arm and pulled her down. “You had your big, emotional talk with Bow and Glimmer - I’ve had a few myself. Those are  _ exhausting _ . “

When her body hit the mattress, the last few restless nights hit her like a truck. Her body felt heavy, her eyes suddenly weighed a ton and the pillows were now more attractive than her girlfriend. 

Okay, that last part was a lie, but they were still wonderful. 

It might just be the exhaustion clouding her brain - causing her to feel more than she normally would. But boy oh boy was her heart soaring with affection for Catra. Sweet, wonderful and sometimes cranky Catra, who dragged her away from their fun game with their friends because she was worried about Adora. 

As soon as Catra sat down next to her, Adora pounced, wrapping her arms around Catra’s waist and hugging her. 

“What are you doing down there?” Catra asked, using a delicate claw to drag the hair from Adora’s forehead. 

“Today was good,” Adora said, closing her eyes. “I don’t want it to end.” 

“Plenty of nights like this ahead of us.” 

Adora opened her eyes, she waited for the doubt to come. That same nagging voice in the back of her brain that told her she was being selfish. That she was wrong for putting herself first. 

It didn’t come. Instead, she was filled with images of this being every night. Cuddled up with Catra in their home, a place she could see, but it wasn’t complete. Just images of walls covered in photos of their life together. 

She was being sappy and she knew it, but she’d never felt so fulfilled before. So comfortable. 

“I love you, Catra.” She had to say it, she didn’t feel like a night should go by where she didn’t. 

Catra responded quickly, “Yeah yeah, I love you, too.” Though not as emotional as Adora’s, it was sincere. Then again, Catra had no idea what was swimming around in Adora’s head. “I’m gonna turn off the lights now, you’re gonna sleep - and if you can’t, what are you going to do?” 

Adora turned her head just enough to look up at Catra. “Wake you up?” She earned a nod. 

“Good girl,” Catra said. “We’ve got another long ass day tomorrow, wandering through space to find who knows what and I need you alert because if I have to deal with Bow and Glimmer stopping to sightsee every little thing we pass I’m going to lose my mind.”

As Catra spoke, Adora cuddled in close and tried to make her mind stop running. Catra’s voice was so soothing, and being pressed this close against her, it felt like a purr lulling her to sleep. 

When Adora didn’t answer, Catra returned to running a hand through her hair and then started to actually purr. 

_ She’s taking care of me. _ Adora thought, her heart in her throat in the best way possible. 

For as scared as she was for whatever the universe might throw at them next - this moment here was perfect. This was the kind of thing she was reaching for. She wasn’t giving up She-ra - she was choosing Catra. The right choice. The only choice she wanted to make. 

She willed herself to fall asleep, cradled in Catra’s arms. But her mind couldn’t stop. Not with anxiety and fear, but with...happiness? Peace? Something indescribably good.

Catra fell asleep first, and though she tried, Adora knew it was a lost cause.

Instead, she carefully slid out of bed and decided to try and work through some of the flashes in her head.

She knew it was stupid and premature, but she just couldn’t help herself. 

She also knew that it was not the smartest thing to be up this late, but they were in space and it was really hard to tell just how late it was. Stll, she just wanted to do a little writing and planning - nothing concrete, just a few ideas that had been swimming around in her head all day. 

Talking with Glimmer and Bow had been extremely cathartic - to know the people she cared about most supported what was probably the biggest and scariest decision of her life relieved a lot of stress. 

So much so, that Adora’s mind was suddenly filled with plans, plans that she didn’t have to feel shame over. At least right now. In a few months when the rest of Etheria found out they might hate her and demand she be charged with treason or something else in that regard, but for now, Adora was happy. 

Which left her up in the middle of the  _ maybe _ night, with a large piece of paper and a pencil as she sketched out what she imagined her and Catra’s farm would look like. 

Adora could remember the first time she thought about having a farm. When they were in the process of repairing a town just outside of Plumeria that was built around agriculture and had many farms that stretched across the vast lands of the valley. The ground there was fertile, Perfuma’s magic had bled through years of her work and made growing there extremely profitable. 

While she knew their farm couldn’t be that far away from Bright Moon, Adora took the layouts of the farms she saw and trapped them away in her memory. 

She knew she didn’t need it to be too big - there would only be two of them and who knew if Catra would actually want to tend to the crops or the animals. 

She imagined a nice, two story house. Nothing crazy, but big enough to have room to train and bring Bow and Glimmer over. They would have a barn for the cows or horses or sheep or whatever they decided on. Just not chickens because chickens scared her. 

Adora could see herself waking up early. Kissing Catra on the cheek and slipping out to watch the sunrise as she went to work tending the crops and feeding the animals. 

It was a future she never imagined for herself, yet it had become the only thing she could think about. Peace, some semblance of the peace she’d spent so long fighting for. To rest and relax and not be scared to think about what might lie ahead. 

Catra was fast asleep just a few feet away from her, and Adora knew the bed was comfy and calling her name, but she had the idea for the fence line she wanted in her head and if she could just sketch it out and put it out there she wouldn’t forget it. 

Just as she was about to finish connecting the dots, something tickled in the back of her throat. She stopped for a second, the strange feeling of a cough building there. She let it out, covering her mouth as not to wake Catra. 

But it was still there, almost burning. She sat her pencil down and took a step away towards the window. Another cough, this one a little more forceful with her arm to cover her face. Still, it wouldn’t go away. It was worse. The burning sensation started to spread down her throat and into her lungs. 

Adora took a few deep breaths, waiting for it to subside. Trying to remember what she ate. Hector made some kind of casserole, it was good - nothing she hadn’t had before. The burning continued to build, so much so that Adora was breathing heavily and her cough was starting to come out on it’s own. 

She stared out at the sky, space so vast and empty - just stars and nothing. They were alone out here and she was suddenly having trouble breathing. 

It hurt, and the more she retched, the more strain it started to put on her body. Her back pain flared up, her legs started to shake and fear settled in. She couldn’t stop coughing, the burn in her chest was only building, spreading like a virus. 

“Catra!” She screamed, her voice ragged and shaky. She was about to fall over - what happened? She was just working on her dream home. She was so close, was she really not allowed to be happy? “Catra…” she cried out again, clutching onto the wall for support. 

There were footsteps behind her, rapid and approaching. She turned to see Catra there, but her whole body was malfunctioning. She couldn’t hear her, everything was blurry. Something touched her arm, but Adora could barely feel it. 

Catra was there, but then she was gone, running away and Adora thought maybe she cried out for her, but she couldn’t tell. Everything hurt and the corner of her vision was going black. 

Was she dying? She really didn’t know. She’d almost died before, but it never felt like this - maybe this was real. Maybe this was what it truly felt like to leave. 

She wanted Catra here to say goodbye. To tell her she loved her, if only she could speak. 

Adora was lying on the floor when Catra came back, she wasn’t alone though. Glimmer was there and Bow too. Her family...her everything. 

She reached for them, trying to grab onto something and found Catra’s arm. She pulled her down with as much energy as she could find, bringing her close. “I love you,” she tried. “I love you.” Again. 

Everything was falling apart. She couldn’t feel her legs. The pain in her body was too much and when the world went dark, she heard Catra screaming her name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just...just bear with me


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, thank you all so much. I was shocked at the response for a story that hadn't been updated in so long. I'm so glad you're all still interested in seeing the end of this one. I haven't decided yet if i'll do the sequel to this or maybe start up a new Catradora AU, but I just know there's another fic of these two in my future. 
> 
> For now though, let's keep wrapping this one up. Thank you again, the support means so much :)

Fourteen.

Fifteen.

Sixteen. 

Catra kept counting. Her arms tired, her eyes watery from unshed tears - but she just kept moving. Her mind could barely remember that random day of rescue training in the Horde. If you could help, help, but a fallen soldier was a liability. You only did this if you had the chance. 

Flat on their back. Neck elevated. 

Thirty compressions. Two rescue breaths. Repeat. 

Adora wasn’t breathing. She was in pain and she was coughing up blood and this was all Catra could do. 

Glimmer and Bow were screaming about something. At each other or Entrapta who was trying to convince Darla to take them home. 

Entratpa told them the truth, it wouldn’t matter. They couldn’t get her home fast enough. Wrong Hordak was gathering water. Catra didn’t know why - maybe the screaming and panic was freaking him out.

She didn’t care. Everything behind her was just noise, with little bits and pieces slipping through on occasion. 

None of it mattered. Catra didn’t care what the plan was, all she could do was keep Adora alive. 

Thirty compressions. Two rescue breaths. Repeat. 

She looked so weak and pale, her chin covered in blood that spilled from her lips - now blue. She was dying. Maybe she was already dead. Catra didn’t know, she just kept pressing on Adora’s chest, tears falling freely from her eyes now. 

“Catra,” Glimmer touched her shoulder, she swore Glimmer was pulling her away from Adora. Telling her to stop. She didn’t say that, but it was the implication and something inside of Catra snapped. 

She turned, in a flurry, and grabbed Glimmer by the collar of her top and drove her into the ground. Magic flared up around Glimmer, but she didn’t strike. Bow shouted at her, but Catra just held Glimmer down - fury in her eyes. 

“No,” Catra snarled before standing up and returning to Adora - to the only thing she could do. 

Thirty compressions. Two rescue breaths. Repeat. 

The room was quiet when Catra’s body started to give out. Her arms started to wilt. Not only could she no longer press on Adora’s chest, she could barely hold herself up. 

The tears had stopped, Catra hadn’t even sobbed or cried out. She couldn’t really feel anything. Just numb as she stared down at Adora - eyes closed, face pale. It felt like a dream, a nightmare. Catra swore she wasn’t real. That none of this was. Her body felt detached, like she would never truly be grounded again. 

When she gave out, she fell against Adora’s body. Still sturdy and strong, but empty. 

Catra’s chest was so tight she felt like her heart was going to explode in her chest. She didn’t care. She welcomed it. Anything to stop the sinking pain in the pit of her stomach. 

Then suddenly, a light. As bright and pure as any Catra had ever seen. Except, she had seen it before - so many times before. 

Hands grabbed her shoulders again, she let them pull her back. When they did, Adora was gone, now taller, wider and hair splayed around her head like a majestic crown. 

_ She-ra _ . 

Her eyes flew open and she gasped, as if all the breath she’d lost was returning in that moment. She clutched her chest and kept taking breaths, almost like she was testing whether or not they were real. 

When she settled and looked at them, Catra still couldn’t speak. 

“Wh - what happened?” She-ra asked, her face clean of blood, her lips pink and beautiful. 

It was Glimmer who answered. “You were dying,” she said, her voice shaky and hoarse. “You...you were just...dying.” 

She-ra’s eyes narrowed, her hand moving to her throat. “I couldn’t breathe. I...I was just coughing and...everything hurt.” It was then that she looked at her hands, her forearms and the muscles she had. She looked at her clothes and touched her crown gently. “I transformed?” 

“Go back,” Catra said, she had to know Adora was okay. “Change back.” 

She-ra shifted on the floor, moving to her knees and stretching out. She looked as she always did, majestic and sturdy, like a tree. But her face was riddled with confusion and a thousand questions racing in her mind. 

Still, she was just She-ra. She hadn’t changed back.

When She-ra closed her eyes, she took a few deep breaths and Catra couldn’t help but be thankful to see her breathing at all. Unfortunately, nothing else happened. No magical glow, no shift - just She-ra who opened her eyes again. 

“I can’t change back. I didn’t...change in the first place. I didn’t do this.” 

Catra shook her head. “That doesn’t make sense. She-ra’s been gone for so long now. Then you...you almost die and now she’s back? Where’s Adora?!””

“Catra,” Glimmer tried, but Catra was a mess. 

“I’m still here, I’m still me.” She-ra said, but if that were true then why couldn’t she transform back? Why was Adora lying there dead and now She-ra was all that remained. “Catra,” the way She-ra said her name sounded like Adora, it really did. So did the look in her eyes. It was enough to grab Catra’s attention - to make her look and let the tension in her back settle. 

“I just watched you die.”

“I don’t know what happened, but I’m still here. I am, I promise.” 

“Maybe it was like...a failsafe?” They all gave Entrapta a look when she said it. Catra had forgotten that she was even there. “Same word, different meaning. But you’re right, whatever was happening to Adora was clearly giving her a one way ticket to non existence. So maybe She-ra activated as some sort of backup plan. A way to keep her alive and functional, even if her host body was…”

“Adora is not dead,” Glimmer said, throwing her hands in the air. “She’s here, she’s right here. Yes, in She-ra form, but Adora is still in there, aren’t you?”

“I am!” Adora demanded. “I’ve always been me, even as She-ra. Just bigger and taller, but still me.” She looked at Catra, who dropped eye contact and stared at the floor. “Catra,” She-ra took a step forward, but Catra took a step back. “Please...I don’t know what to do.” 

When Catra looked up, she saw blue eyes staring back at her. They were higher up than usual, but they looked the same. 

“Is she still in here? My Adora?” 

She-ra smiled, taking another step. Catra held her ground, her body shaking as a pair of large, strong hands touched her face. “I’m still here, I promise. I don’t know what this is, but I’m still here.” 

Catra nodded as She-ra’s thumb brushed a tear from her cheek. 

She wanted to believe it, so desperately she wanted to believe Adora was still there. But why couldn’t she change back? Why couldn’t Catra see her? 

Why did this loss feel so familiar?

* * *

Catra was exhausted. Her mind felt like mush and her chest was refusing to loosen - so all she did was sit on her bed and stare out the window. 

She-ra was talking with Entrapta, and had said she’d be back soon. Catra wasn’t entirely sure what that meant or what would happen when she came back. She just knew that they were still in the middle of space. Still days away from their destination and had no idea what that even meant. 

It had all happened so fast. Not two hours ago, Catra was saying goodnight to Adora and talking about their future. Now, she was waiting for  _ She-ra _ to come back and what? Cuddle up and go to sleep? Pretend like things were normal? Like Catra hadn’t worn herself out trying to bring Adora back. 

When She-ra returned, she was quiet. Catra vaguely wondered if She-ra needed sleep. If she was tired or upset, if she even felt discomfort. Sure she did, Catra remembered giving it to her multiple times. 

Maybe that was why it was so hard to be around She-ra compared to Adora. When they were on opposite sides of the war, it was much simpler to call She-ra the enemy. That was who she fought on the battlefield most often. She-ra - the physical embodiment of the enemy. 

Catra could separate the two. Yes, she did terrible things to Adora, but she’d convinced herself in her broken down mind back then that she was helping Adora - trying to rid her of this curse. 

Her tune changed, she knew now what She-ra really was - what she meant to Adora. But that didn’t change the fact that Catra fell in love with  _ Adora _ , not She-ra and seeing She-ra come into their room on this ship felt wrong. 

“Entrapta said we can speed up a little, and should make it to Tyr Nova a little sooner.” 

Catra nodded. “Does she know yet if there’s anything there?” 

She-ra made her way around the bed, into Catra’s view. She leaned against the wall, keeping her distance. “No...I guess we’ll find out soon enough.” 

It was getting harder and harder for Catra to focus - she was so tired. When she looked up at She-ra again, she smiled. “Get some rest. I think things have settled down.” 

Catra swallowed the lump in her throat. “What about you?” 

She-ra shrugged, looking shy and almost...scared. “I - I can sleep on the floor if...if that makes you more comfortable.” 

“Don’t be stupid,” Catra didn’t want to say it like that, but all of this was so messed up. 

“Am I?” She-ra said. “Because...the way you’re looking at me and the way you're talking to me…I might as well be a stranger.” Her voice broke as her sentence finished and Catra winced. She knew what She-ra was saying was true because she felt it. It was hard to just pretend things were okay - that this girl standing across from her, four feet taller and almost beaming light and power, was the same girl Catra had given her heart to. 

Their faces were the same, their voices the same, but Catra just wanted Adora to come back to her. 

“You keep scaring me. You keep...leaving me.” Now it was Catra’s turn to break. 

She-ra moved quickly, Catra looked up just as She-ra knelt down in front of her, hands large and warm on Catra’s legs, she pressed their foreheads together. 

Carefully, Catra reached up and put her hands on She-ra’s cheeks. Her jaw was strong and delicate, a lot like Adora. She made a sound in the back of her throat when Catra gently ran her claw along She-ra’s throat - a sign of trust they’d found years ago. 

Just like Adora. 

With a little hesitation, Catra put her arms around She-ra’s neck and buried her face against She-ra’s shoulder. 

From there, a pair of strong arms wrapped around her, holding her. Somehow both powerful and tender, the size truly making Catra feel small and safe. 

She cried, the visions flooding her mind of Adora lying on the table, dying no matter what Catra did to save her. Soft, shaky sobs escaped her but She-ra held her and didn’t say a word. 

When she finally settled, her eyes barely open, she was being lifted and moved to the bed. She-ra settled her down, and when Catra looked up, that face looking at her was familiar again. 

She-ra leaned down, giving Catra a kiss on the forehead. When she turned to walk away, Catra grabbed her arm. 

“Stay,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “You can stay.” 

* * *

Despite falling asleep with She-ra next to her, things were not magically okay for Catra after that. It was hard and awkward and she knew it was painful, but she struggled so much to look at She-ra and not feel some distance between them. 

She-ra tried her best, despite everything, to reassure Catra and be as sweet as possible. She smiled at her, cuddled her at night, talked to her just like Adora did, but the fact that she still hadn’t changed back hung heavy over all of it.

They were a day out from Tyr Nova, a name Catra had used to give herself hope. Hope that they would find something that could fix all of this and bring Adora back to her. 

Until then, all Catra could do was sit and wait and pretend her heart wasn’t broken. 

Which is how she found herself sitting in the kitchen area of the ship, picking at a sweet roll and losing herself in the dull hum of space. 

A soft set of footsteps made their way up to her, too soft to be She-ra. So she looked up and saw Glimmer with a soft look in her eyes and a smile on her face. 

“Are you going to eat that or just rip it to shreds?”

Catra rolled her eyes, but smiled nonetheless. “Depends on how irritating this conversation is.” She teased and Glimmer laughed. “She-ra send you?”

Glimmer sat down across from her and rested her elbows on the table. “She didn’t, she’s talking with Entrapta. Well...she’s listening to Entrapta with a blank look on her face.”

This made Catra chuckle. “Sounds about right.” 

“You have to stop doing that by the way.” Glimmer said, in that tone of hers that meant she wasn’t here to argue. 

“Doing what?” Catra said, not sure why she was playing dumb. 

When Glimmer rolled her eyes, Catra realized that was why. “You have to stop calling her She-ra.”

Shame washed over her, she knew it, but hearing it somehow made it worse. “That’s who she is.” Catra bit back, she was teetering on the edge of losing her mind and that terrified her. “She’s gigantic and dressed in white with gold everywhere. She’s…” There was no end to that sentence. 

No good end, at least. 

“She’s hurting, just like you.” Glimmer sighed. “Worse, probably, she’s the one -”

“No,” Catra cut Glimmer off. “There’s no way it’s worse.” Glimmer seemed ready to say something, but Catra wouldn’t let her. “She died…” just saying the words burned Catra’s throat. “For how long I tried to bring her back, her...lying there like that...she  _ died _ Glimmer. And then  _ She-ra _ comes back, and suddenly can’t transform into Adora. It’s not fair. It’s never been fair and every time I see her all I think about is that She-ra took Adora away from me,  _ again _ !” Catra screamed and slammed her hands on the table in anger and fury. 

Glimmer, to her credit, didn’t flinch or draw back. Just looked at Catra with that same soft understanding. It was as frustrating as it was comforting. 

“Okay, say that’s true. Say what you’re saying is true...are you really going to act the same way you did last time?” Glimmer’s words struck deep in a place Catra thought she had long since buried. Something in her stomach turned, twisting like a knot and she felt an anger she hadn’t in years. 

“Tread carefully…”

“No,” Glimmer poked Catra in the cheek for good measure. “So what? So something happened. So Adora’s dealing with something bad. So She-ra is here and she’s ruining your life. What else is new?” 

Catra wanted to fight. “What are you talking about? This isn’t some casual thing! Adora died!”

“No she didn’t! She’s in the other room, heartbroken because she thinks you hate her!” 

“That’s not Adora! That’s She-ra!” 

With a groan, Glimmer pinched the bridge of her nose and threw her head back. “You’re so...ugh,” She took a breath. “Catra, I don’t know how to get this through to you, but She-ra and Adora are not two different entities. Yes. She-ra is a lot of responsibility for Adora and yes, we all supported Adora when she said she wanted to leave that life behind, and we still do. But She-ra is a hero. She is a beacon of hope and someone who will fight and sacrifice anything and everything for the well being of people who need and deserve her help. Does that not sound like someone else you know?” 

Catra’s anger started to fade, slowly being replaced with a familiar sadness. “Then why can’t she come back? Where’d Adora go? What if…”

“I can’t answer that, Catra. But I can tell you that She-ra will fight and do whatever she can to figure it out and make it right. That’s what she does, just like Adora. Whatever you think about She-ra, know that there is a ten foot woman on the deck of this ship, who is devastated and scared and could really use her girlfriend’s support right now.” Glimmer put a hand on Catra’s back, running a slow, comforting circle. “You’re right, She-ra took Adora away from you before and...we all know what happened. Do you really want to push her away and go through all that again?”

Catra took a long breath and buried her face in her hands. She did  _ not _ want to go through that again. Glimmer was right - they’d been through so much and every time, She-ra found a way. Even when Catra was doing everything in her power to stop that from happening. 

What purpose did it serve to run away now? Who was she helping? Certainly not herself, sitting in here alone and sad. 

No, she was past that. She had to be better than that.

She was better than that. 

Looking up, Catra smiled at Glimmer, who rolled her eyes with a laugh. 

“Shut up, I’m trying to say thank you.”

“I know,” Glimmer squeezed Catra’s shoulder. “Now please, go get your girl. She’s eight feet tall and pacing a hole in the floor.” 

Catra nodded, she had to let go of this hatred for She-ra. This idea that She-ra was the enemy. She had to fight beside She-ra, to try and save Adora.

Catra found She-r…Adora...sitting rather uncomfortably on their bed in the room they shared. She was gently doodling in one of her many notebooks that charted the stars. It was another affirmation that She-ra and Adora were still very much the same person. The only noticeable difference being that She-ra’s hands were so big the pencil and pad looked miniature in her grip. 

She was so entranced in her work that she must not have heard Catra come in. Taking advantage of that, Catra settled against the door frame and watched her for a bit. She was cute, at eight feet tall she could somehow still look so vulnerable and sweet. Her tongue barely poking out between her lips, her legs bent almost up to her chest because the bed was so low to the ground. 

Deciding she’d been quiet for too long, Catra took a step into the room. 

“Hey, Adora.” 

Adora looked back quickly, startled, the crown atop her head the only thing shining brighter than her eyes. She stood up in a hurry, like she’d been caught doing something wrong and put her notebook down on the bed. 

“H - Hey Catra.” Her voice was so tentative and nervous, Catra felt bad for making her feel this way. 

Still, she wasn’t entirely sure how to approach. She-ra was so tall and intimidating. But her eyes and her face were familiar, soft and beautiful. “I love you,” she said, as steady as emphatic as she’d ever said it before. “I know...I’ve been acting weird and all of this is really hard for me, I...I felt like I watched you die in my arms and I miss when you were only a little taller than me and not…” she gestured as a joke, and it did enough to make Adora smile. “But you... _ our _ best friend, Sparkles, reminded me that She-ra is still very much Adora and Adora is still the girl I love and asked to marry me.”

“I am,” she moved around the bed. When she saw the height difference, she sat down awkwardly on the bed again. Catra saw her legs spread just enough to fit into, so she did, closing the gap between them. “I’m still me and I’m pretty scared and...I promise, I don’t want this. I don’t want to be -” her eyes were welling up with tears and Catra was quick to comfort her. 

“I know,” she reached up and touched Adora’s face, her thumb tracing over the crown and along her cheek. “Shh,” she whispered when Adora sobbed at the contact. “We’ll figure this out, okay. That’s what we do.” Adora nodded against her, but it didn’t feel like enough. Catra knew it wasn’t enough. “I’m...I’m sorry,” she said, feeling Adora’s breath catch a little. “It wasn’t fair of me to…” Catra sighed, she had no idea how to say what she wanted to say. “I love  _ you _ ,” she said instead, because that’s what she was going for. “I always will.”

Adora pulled back a bit, she looked like a mess with tear stains on her cheeks and red, puffy eyes. It was weird to see She-ra like this, but somehow it reminded Catra even more of Adora.

“This doesn’t change anything. I still want...all that stuff with you. The farm and the cows and horses. The...kids...maybe...one day.” She finished shyly, making Catra smile. “My plan is still the same. You’re still my future.”

Even if she wasn’t sure why she ever doubted that, hearing Adora say it eased her. “Now we just have to find a way to bring you back and figure out what to do with…” she gestured up and down She-ra’s massive frame. “All of this.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost there, sorry for the delay last week. Thank you so so much for the support even after I took such a long break from this story. I won't lie to you guys because you've always been so good and so kind to me, I'm not 100% happy with the end of this story. It's why it took so long to get it posted. As I learned writing it, the She-ra canon is tricky as hell and in a lot of ways it's hard to write in when you dig too deep - at least for me it was. Maybe I was overthinking it, or maybe I'm just too attached to the chaacters and not enough to the actual world they're in lol. Either way, I hope the final two chapters aren't too disappointing - I did my best and even if I wasn't fully satisfied with it, I didn't want to leave it unfinished. 
> 
> The next chapter won't take as long to come out - a few days probably. Thank you for reading and supporting and being so good to me. It means a lot <3

Adora found herself sitting in the captain’s chair of Mara...her ship. It was her ship, after all. She could call it Mara’s all she wanted, but this was She-ra’s ship and right now Adora was entirely She-ra. 

It was early, according to their Etherian clock. The rest of the ship was asleep - soon to wake as they approached the coordinates for Tyr Nova. 

As it turned out, She-ra did not need sleep. Worse than that, she didn’t need to eat or drink or...anything. She was an entirely magical being. Inhuman, in a lot of ways and it bothered Adora how she never knew that. 

When she was She-ra, it was always temporary. In the battlefield and during the war. In flashes and moments when strength and power were needed. The times when Adora wasn’t enough and magic was the key - She-ra arrived in a burst of light and a wave of fury to save the day. 

Now, she was here, she was everything. Adora still had all of her memories and feelings. She was still Adora in her mind and her heart. She looked at Catra and saw love - saw her future. She watched Bow and Glimmer with a joyful feeling in her stomach. The two people who showed her the world she didn’t even know existed. Everyone around her still mattered as before. 

The one difference was her. She didn’t feel right, didn’t feel normal and not needing to sleep or eat to function was just another reminder that the future she wanted would not happen in this form. 

She-ra, for all the great things she’d given Adora, was not who she wanted to be. 

“Adora,” Entrapta came down beside her on a rope of hair, holding a pair of pliers in one hand and a small piece of twisted metal in the other. “It’s not like you to be awake this early. You don’t usually show up for another two hours.”

It was such a small thing, but Entrapta called her Adora - it was appreciated. “She-ra doesn’t sleep,” she said, it sounded weird on her tongue. “I’m as wide awake as I would be if it was the middle of the day.”

“Oh wow!” Suddenly Entrapta was right in Adora’s face, using her hair to pull her head up and stare into her eyes. “That’s so curious. No sleep? I wonder if that’s some kind of First Ones advancement. Do you have any idea how much more work I could get done if  _ I _ didn’t sleep?”

Adora gently pushed Entrapta away - she felt abnormal enough without being a potential experiment. “I didn’t know you slept.”

“Unfortunately!” Entrapta went back to working on...whatever she was working on. “I make sure Hector wakes me up early though, before the rest of you. So I can do status checks and clean ups on the ship without distraction.” 

“Sorry to distract.”

Entrapa shrugged. “That’s okay! You’ve hardly moved all night.” Adora sighed, that was true. She couldn’t sleep, but she didn’t have the energy to do anything but let her mind race. “What’s it like? Being She-ra?” 

“I - I don’t know. She’s tall, which isn’t always great in small doorways and it’s kinda cramped being her in parts of the ship. She’s strong, sometimes too much. I broke a mug last night pouring a drink of water that I didn’t even want or need because She-ra doesn’t need that kind of stuff.” 

“Have you decided yet if Adora is dead in there?” Entrapta would never not be herself - to the point as always. 

“No,” that was hard to admit out loud. “I don’t know. I’m still...me. I still feel like me. I just can’t transform back.”

“That’s never happened before, has it?” Adora shook her head. “Makes you wonder if the magical spell done to you during the fight was perhaps timed. Some kind of release point was hit and perhaps this was the intended result all along! Or maybe it’s proximity activated! Now that we’re close to our destination the She-ra device went off in your brain!” 

Adora glanced Entrapta’s way. She truly was just thinking out loud - still working on her little device. The only difference now was that she had a mask on and a blow torch.

“I don’t know what the point would be. Why not just make this happen to me right away?” 

Entrapta stopped for a moment, lifting her mask with a curious look on her face. “There was not much logic behind their attack in the first place, was there? They all died fighting you and for what? It didn't even kill you!” Entrapta threw her hands in the air. “All that power and magic and planning just to destroy themselves and let you survive! It’s not very logical.” 

“So you think they...did this to me on purpose?” 

Entrapta laughed. “It would make more sense than just dying in the middle of a fight. They fight you. They die fighting you. They leave behind a perfectly traceable artifact that only  _ you _ can feel power from and the moment we’re a day away from finding the rest of it you suddenly transform into She-ra and can’t transform back! It’s like you’re the mouse in the maze and there’s only one path to the cheese!” 

“Do you think I should be worried?” 

“You’re stuck in a magical form and can’t transform back. I’d be worried if you weren’t worried.” 

“Fair,” Adora sighed. “Do you think it’s a trap?” 

“Probably,” Entrapta put her helmet back on. “But what choice do we have? You can’t live like that, can you?” 

“I don’t know,” she really didn’t. “Maybe I could but, I don’t want to.” 

“Because of the way Catra looks at you?” 

Adora was really wishing she’d just stayed in her room.

_ Reaching destination in thirty minutes _

Darla’s voice sounded over the loudspeaker, making both Adora and Entrapta stop their conversation and look towards the dashboard. 

“That can’t be right,” Adora said. 

Entrapta moved towards the dash. “Darla is never wrong.” She said matter-of-factly. “According to the scans, we are reaching the signal of Tyr Nova...or...part of it.”

Adora moved to see what Entrapta was looking at. When she did, the holographic screen was that of a lot of tiny rocks scattered across a grid - they were all various shapes and sizes, surrounding one that was much larger, but looked to have been cracked in half like an egg missing it’s top. 

The air felt like it left Adora’s lungs. “So it’s...destroyed?” 

“It’s certainly not viable for life anymore!”

Tyr Nova was...gone? It was gone. It was such a small bit of hope in such a dire situation but it was all Adora had and now it was gone. Destroyed and what had it taken with it? Adora’s future. Her ability to ever be herself or be with Catra the way she wanted to be? 

Was she stuck now as She-ra? Stuck to live a life she didn’t want and spend every night awake while her whole world slept. She couldn’t eat, she couldn’t sleep, she couldn’t be normal, just a weapon - a tool. That’s all she’d ever been her whole life and now it was just a fact instead of a metaphor. 

It would be so easy for Adora to break here. She didn't even know if She-ra could freak out the way Adora used to when things were hard. The quiet moments in her bedroom or in the tents that Bright Moon would scatter on journeys where she would sit alone and cry and try and slow her mind long enough to come up with a plan. 

There was no time for that. She’d been down for so long. Struggled through so much in the last few months - she was tired of weakness.

“We need to land on that rock. Darla, sound the alarm to wake everyone up - the soft alarm!” She corrected, remembering how loud the ship’s main alarm was. “Then set a course for Tyr Nova.” 

“I am seeing 453 variations of Tyr Nova.” Darla said simply. 

Adora looked at Entrapta. “All the little bits and pieces of it carry the same readings. They’re all, technically, Tyr Nova.”

“Right…” Adora looked at the holographic map again. “Well...land on the biggest one.”

“Yes, She-ra.”

* * *

If everything went according to plan, then Adora would be herself again by the end of this mission. That was the plan. That was why Hector was carrying around her spacesuit for her. As She-ra, she could walk through space and through unlivable planets without a problem, but once this was done, whatever it was, she would be herself again. 

That was what Adora chose to believe. That was where she’d found the strength to press on even after realizing that Tyr Nova was cracked and broken into hundreds of pieces. 

They found themselves on the biggest piece. It was a mess of craters and jagged edges. There were no old structures or remnants of what had been here before, just the shattered insides of a planet. 

Still, they pressed on and Adora wasn’t sure why, but she felt like they were headed towards something. 

“You know, I’ve never seen the inside of a planet like this,” Bow remarked, holding out his tracker pad as it blinked red and green lights. “Can’t say I want to ever again.” 

A hand touched Adora’s and she looked over to see that Catra had slid up beside her. She had a soft smile on her face, but there was concern behind it - no doubt because this was what they had locked all of their hopes on too. Like little children thinking they’d stumble across a miracle. It was silly and stupid, but here they were. 

“Missed you last night,” Catra said but Adora didn’t feel any guilt, just comfort. 

“Hopefully I’ll be back tonight,”

Catra frowned. “Hopefully?” 

Adora didn’t know what to say. How could she tell Catra that if she stayed as She-ra she probably wouldn’t come to bed with her at night. How could she? Knowing she couldn’t sleep, couldn’t be what Catra wanted. That she would just lay there all night thinking and suffering through hour after hour. It sounded miserable to be so close to Catra and yet feel so far away. 

Thankfully, the beep of Bow’s tracker pad saved Adora from the conversation. She raced forward to catch up with him.

“What is it?” 

“The source from Entrapta’s research is getting stronger. That big hill,” he pointed forward towards a very jagged and steep hill that looked more like a cliff. As if the side of a mountain had been cut like a cake. “At the top of that is where I’d say the signal is coming from.”

“The one that matches our artifact?” 

“This is so exciting!” Entrapta squealed. 

“It’s so quiet here…” Glimmer added and when Adora looked, she noticed that Glimmer and Catra were standing close to each other. As if Glimmer had seen Adora run from Catra and moved in by her side to take her place. 

Adora’s heart ached, she was glad Glimmer would be there for Catra if…

Suddenly, a burst of light struck from the top of the cliff. It was bright, shining into the sky like a beacon. It climbed up through the empty darkness of space, going so high Adora couldn’t see where it ended. 

“Well that’s gotta be something, right?” Catra said and they all agreed. This was most definitely the place they needed to be. Whether or not it was going to do what Adora wanted it to do was another story entirely. 

So they walked, slow and steady. When they reached the base of the cliff, Adora noted just how steep it was - almost straight up. 

“There’s no way we all make it.” She said, looking back at the others. “I can turn the sword into something to climb with and probably carry someone on my back but...I can’t get you all up there.” 

“I knew I should have made climbing equipment! You never know when you’ll need climbing equipment!” Entrapta started yelling and then pulled a notebook out of her suit, which apparently had pockets, and started writing something. 

Adora looked to the others, she knew any one of them would come with her. 

“I don’t think a vote is really necessary,” Glimmer said, rolling her eyes. “We all know who you’re going to take.” 

“I am the smallest, easiest to carry.” Catra said, sounding only a little triumphant. 

Glimmer rolled her eyes. “You’re also her fiance.”

“That too,” Catra looked at Adora and it broke Adora’s heart. Not because Catra looked upset by the words, not at all - she actually smiled at her, brightly. It was just the heaviest of reminders to Adora that the life she and Catra had agreed to was potentially ripped away from them before they ever had a chance to live it. “You up for it?”

Adora couldn’t think about that now. She had to do what she had done her entire life - put aside what she wanted and do what had to be done. “Yeah,” She summoned her sword and used She-ra’s magic to transform it into a pickaxe that could sink into the rock and still be easy to hold onto. 

“You be careful,” Glimmer said as she pulled Catra into a hug. Adora was content to watch but then suddenly Bow was attacking her.

“Oof! Bow!” She laughed and wrapped her arms around him. “We’ll be fine.” She picked him up off the ground and squeezed.

“Nothing about this is fine,” he said and Adora put him down. He looked up at her and smiled. “Don’t do anything, you know, Adora-y.” 

“Do not use my name as a verb.” He laughed and Adora hugged him again and when she looked over his shoulder, she could see Catra and Glimmer having a very serious looking conversation. 

Glimmer looked like she was crying a little and Catra was holding onto her shoulders and talking to her. Adora couldn’t hear them, but Glimmer was nodding slowly and Catra kept explaining something to her. It was intense and Adora’s mind raced with what it might be. 

Then suddenly they pulled away and Glimmer was coming over to her and Adora felt like she was about to throw up. Glimmer hugged her, gentle and warm. Adora didn’t pick her up like Bow, instead she knelt down to accommodate her. For as much as Glimmer was her best friend, she was also a person Adora sought comfort in. As the years had passed, Glimmer had grown more and more - to the point that she often reminded Adora of Angella. She was strong and steady, a rock to lean on when things were hard or scary. Right now, Adora wasn’t sure she’d ever been this afraid. 

“I am not asking you, I’m telling you, you come back to us, okay? _ You, _ Adora. Come back.” Glimmer could also dish out orders like her mother. 

Adora hugged her, held her and used restraint so She-ra’s strength didn’t hurt her - but she didn’t want to let go. “I will…”

“No,” Glimmer shook her head. “You promise me. Promise you’ll come back.” 

It wasn’t a promise she felt she could make, but the way Glimmer was looking at her, the way she was holding her, she could only nod and whisper. 

“I promise.” She really hoped the last thing she told Glimmer wasn’t a broken promise.

The goodbyes lingered and the anxiety rose, but eventually, Adora found herself climbing with Catra’s arms around her shoulders. The climb was hard, but nothing she couldn’t handle. If there was one benefit to being forever She-ra it’s that She-ra didn’t fatigue easily and she was strong enough that she could literally kick holes in the stone for climbing slots. 

It was quiet the entire way up. Neither her or Catra apparently knew what to say. Adora wasn’t sure what she could say. There were so many unknowns. This whole trip felt like them going on instinct and then something happened and she...transformed and couldn’t go back and now their future felt so unsteady. 

Their present felt unsteady.

Still, Catra  _ was _ here and was holding onto her and coming with her and supporting her. Even with things as shaky and scary as they were, Catra was here and Adora couldn’t take that for granted. Despite everything the last few months had thrown at them, Catra had never wavered from her side. 

“I love you,” she said once they were near the top. The light shining above them was so bright now, when she looked back, Catra’s eyes were shining. 

Catra looked at her, her face softening as Adora slowed her climb. She wanted this moment. She wanted to have it and hold onto it for as long as she could. 

Catra smiled. “I love you, too.” She took a breath and reached up, Adora used her free hand to wrap around and hold Catra steady against her. “ _ Adora _ , I love you.” She said again, leaning forward to kiss her. 

They climbed up to the light, together.


	16. Chapter 16

When Adora woke, everything hurt. For better or worse, at least Adora knew she was still alive. 

More than that, she wasn’t lying in a pile of rocks and rubble - unless those rocks and rubble had grown very soft and accommodating. 

It took a tremendous amount of effort for Adora to find the strength to open her eyes, when she did, she was blinded by a very bright light. A familiar light - a light from inside of her ship. 

Taking a deep breath, Adora fought through the burning sensation in her back and sat up. Her head felt like it was full of fog and mush as she moved - her brain sloshing around. She tried to think of what she could remember. Climbing up to the top of that cliff - there was a large rock formation, a bright light and...a voice?

_ You are a vessel. _

_ Your body cannot contain this power _

_ This choice is not yours _

That voice, it wasn’t Light Hope, but the way it spoke and the things it said were all very similar. 

She remembered it telling her things, telling her that she had made mistakes and was suffering for thinking she could be free.

The sound of Catra’s voice tickled her memory - screaming at the rock. Defending Adora. Then…

“Catra?” She called out, looking frantically around the room. This was the infirmary of the ship, but she was the only one in here. She didn’t remember coming down from the cliff or what happened - the memories were all so jumbled. She just knew there was arguing and screaming and... _ fear _ . “Catra?!” She cried a little more frantically, swinging her legs over the side of the cot to try and stand. 

That was a mistake, because the pain in her body doubled and everything felt heavy. She fell forward, onto her hands and knees. That was when she saw her arms, her own arms. 

Not She-ra. She was herself again - no wonder everything hurt so much. 

The relief wanted to come out, she transformed back and that was the whole point - but where was Catra?

The hissing sound of the infirmary door opening drew Adora’s head up, she saw Bow standing there with a cup of water that he unceremoniously dropped the moment he saw her. “Adora!” He shouted before sliding down beside her. “What are you doing?”

“Good...to see you too.” She ground out, begging her back to stop hurting. It felt as bad as it had after the fight on Tiptree, but she knew it wasn’t because she was still able to actually move. With a little help from Bow, Adora managed to sit up just enough to not look like she’d fallen over. “What happened? How are we back on the ship?”

Bow frowned, taking a seat beside her. “You don’t remember?” Adora shook her head, which made her brain slosh around again. “Well hopefully Catra does.”

“She’s okay? Where is she?” The look on his face was not what Adora wanted to see. Worry, fear, maybe even a little panic. “Bow, where is she?”

“She’s here, okay? She’s...she’s here and she’s safe.” Adora started to push to her feet again. “Will you stop that, you’re injured!”

Adora glared at him. “Where is she?” 

Bow sighed. “The two of you fell off the cliff, literally fell. There was a big explosion and you fell and you were holding her and the impact...Adora...you put a crater in the ground.”

No wonder her back hurt so much. “But I had her?” 

“You did, but she was...out of it. You both were by the time you landed.” Adora tried and failed to wrack her brain and remember this. She could see pieces, small moments and she could  _ feel _ herself falling - but it felt like a dream or a memory that belonged to someone else. “You uh...you also had that.” He pointed and Adora’s eyes followed the direction. 

There, she saw a sword - as familiar as it was the day she found it stuck out in the forest. 

“The Sword of Protection.” She looked at Bow who nodded. “But...how? The sword...is back?”

“Looks like it, and now you...you’re you again.”

_ “I don’t want your power! I want my life back!” _

_ “It is not your choice. She-ra was created to protect us. She was created to serve.” _

Flashes came back to her, she could remember arguing, Catra’s hand digging into her wrist with each panicked word she screamed. 

“Catra,” she said again, wishing desperately that Catra was here. “I need to see her.”

Bow gave her a long look, like maybe if he stared at her hard enough he could convince her to climb back into bed and rest. 

She knew better and so did he. “Fine, can you stand?”

“Of course,” she said with far more confidence than she actually felt. 

Bow rose to his feet first, then leaned down and hooked her under the arm and helped her up. Everything hurt, her back and her knees especially. Still, she was able to push through it and find her footing - though a bit wobbly. Adora clutched onto Bow’s shoulder, trying not to grab him too hard. 

He didn’t seem to mind. “Okay, one foot in front of the other. She’s down the hall in our room.”

“Why your room?” 

“Glimmer wanted to watch over her. I had Adora duty, she had Catra duty.”

Something about the way he spoke, so casual as if that was just a thing, made Adora’s heart soar. “I love you guys so much.”

He smiled. “We love you guys too, now if you could please stop almost dying I’d really appreciate it.”

“Right,” Adora cast a glance at the sword leaning against the wall as they left the infirmary. “Hopefully this was the last one.”

The walk to Catra wasn’t long, but it sure was tiring. Adora’s body was constantly protesting at every movement she made. It was not an entirely unfamiliar feeling - this pain. It reminded her a lot of the way she felt after the fight at Tiptree. Only with less crippling pain and more constant throb. The throb she could withstand - she was able to stay on her own two feet (with only a little help) and that was enough. 

When they entered Glimmer and Bow’s room, Glimmer immediately stood up at the sight of Adora hobbling in. Adora only saw her for a moment before her eyes found Catra. 

She was lying on the bed, tucked under a blanket and if not for the bandage above her left eye, she would just look like she was sleeping. 

“Catra,” Adora whispered, just needing to hear the name but not wanting to wake her. Adora slumped over to the bed, almost falling but Bow helped her settle onto her knees. It hurt, but she didn’t care. “She’s okay?” Adora asked, looking up at Glimmer who sighed. 

“She’s okay, you’re both survivors. You’re both dumb as rocks, but survivors all the same.”

Suddenly, the bed shifted and Adora looked to see Catra’s brow furrow and her body start to rock. For a moment, panic surged through Adora at the sight of Catra struggling - maybe she was having a nightmare or in pain or -

“Why am I tucked in so tight?” She opened her eyes, a beautiful sight and Adora let go of the breath she was holding. “We...we made it?” She asked, eyes finding Adora. “We’re on the ship?”

Adora nodded, her smile so wide it hurt. “We made it.”

“You’re…” Catra stopped herself, but Adora knew where she was going. 

“I’m here. Just me.”

The way Catra smiled made Adora swoon. She was enough - Catra had said it to her more than once but it was here now, just her and that was enough. The look on Catra’s face said more than that - it was everything Adora wanted. Something she’d never felt before. 

She was enough. 

“And the sword?” Catra asked, her soft expression crinkling a bit. 

“It’s here,” Glimmer said. “Adora had it strapped to her back when you guys fell.”

Catra nodded, taking a deep breath. “Good, they believed us.”

“What?” Adora knew she was frowning, but Catra just smiled. 

“You don’t remember?” Adora shook her head. “The Touchstone, it was an AI - it was telling you that the power of She-ra inside of you was killing you. That you couldn’t contain it for so long. Couldn’t repress it. You told it you didn’t want it and it started freaking out, telling you that you had no choice, that you were the only vessel left or some strange, guilt trip Weaver-level crap.”

Adora could hear the voice. It was vague, like something from a dream that was slowly getting away from her. “A weapon,” she said and Catra nodded. 

“That’s all She-ra ever was to the First Ones. It explains why there’s tech out there that basically makes her a mindless killing machine. She-ra was never meant to have a choice.”

It hurt Adora more than she was capable of understanding in this moment - but her people, the ones she came from, they were tyrants. The way they treated Mara - the history of She-ra’s creation and the stories she remembered from Prime. 

The First Ones were no heroes.

“How did you convince it to let you go? To...free Adora from She-ra.”

“We didn’t,” Catra said. “The Touchstone was fading, dying - it had one last burst of power in it. It wanted to give all that to Adora, it wanted to make her the last...beacon of the First Ones, but if there’s one thing I learned from Entrapta, is that it’s all about the data.” 

Adora looked around at Bow and Glimmer, happy to see that they were just as confused as Adora was. 

Catra on the other hand was grinning as she sat up. “So you...lied to an AI?”

“Nope, I told it the truth - they wanted their precious First Ones power to carry on, but Adora’s not immortal - she won’t last forever. So we lied, or...you did. You just asked it to take the power out and put it into a new sword. The Touchstone was low on power, only enough to make a final sword and it did, then it syphoned all of it and Adora’s energy into the sword and just…” Catra made an explosive gesture with her hands. “That’s when we fell, but you must have grabbed the sword before it. I don’t remember, the blast knocked me out.”

“So the power is back in the sword?” Bow asked and Catra nodded.

“More than that, whatever power She-ra has and the Touchstone had...it’s all there.”

Adora looked at her hands, she looked deep within herself and she couldn’t feel any traces of She-ra. That wasn’t much different than how she’d felt after the fight at Tiptree, but that emptiness that had been there at that time was gone now. Instead, she felt calm, like a weight was off her shoulders. 

She-ra was no longer fused with her, no longer holding a grip on her future. 

“I - I…” the tears started to fall before she could catch them. 

“Hey,” that was Catra, who tried to sit up and groaned in pain. 

Glimmer sighed. “Will you lie down, you fell like 800 feet.” 

Catra rolled her eyes. “It wasn’t that far!” 

Thankfully, Glimmer slid in next to Adora and put her arms around her, Bow did the same. “Easy,” Glimmer cooed, pressing a soft kiss on Adora’s temple. 

“What are we going to do with it?” 

That weight, as familiar as it had been since she was a kid being told by Shadow Weaver that she was meant for greatness, came flooding back into Adora’s mind. They had so much power now, so much weight and responsibility that she could use to protect the people she loved. That could fulfill her destiny. She looked at Glimmer, her friend, the Queen. “I - I can...what do you want to do with it?”

Glimmer smiled. “The sword is yours Adora, you decide what happens to it.”

Taking a deep breath, Adora looked at Catra, the woman who had been with her through so much in the last few months. The same person she’d grown up with, fought with and against - the centerpiece of Adora’s past, present and future.

“I want you to take it,” she said to Glimmer who’s smile only grew. “Take it, protect it, keep it safe and if we’re ever desperate enough to need it, then we will, but if not...I don’t need it.”

“Okay," Glimmer nodded. “As Queen of Bright Moon, locking away the Sword of Protection will be priority one when we return home.”

“Priority two is building our new house, right?” Catra smirked. “Fully funded by the monarchy after I got my ass handed to me by a talking rock?” 

Adora rolled her eyes, tears filling them as she took Catra’s hand.

She was free, for the first time in her life, Adora’s future belonged entirely to her. 

* * *

Catra woke to the sound of a hammer. 

She opened one eye and immediately regretted it - the sun was out and shining right through the bedroom window. If it was any more directly in her face Catra would have sworn the universe was doing this on purpose. 

The hammering started again and Catra sighed, rolling away from the glowing sun and reaching for Adora to cuddle against. 

Instead, she found nothing and it all came rushing back to her.

Where she was, why there was suddenly sunlight in her face in the morning and where the hammering was coming from. 

“Adora,” Catra groaned, rolling onto her back, her eye twitching as the hammering picked up again. She sat up, rubbing her face with both hands before looking around their new bedroom and trying to figure out where she could hide Adora’s tools. 

It took Catra a good fifteen minutes to fully drag herself out of bed. The entire thing was a process. First she had to take the blanket off, even then she had to find the energy to swing her legs off the bed. She sat there, debating whether or not to just fall onto her back and go to sleep. Eventually, she stood up and stretched every muscle she could before slinking her way downstairs towards the continued sounds of hammer. 

By the time Catra finally stepped outside, Adora had returned to the porch where she had her little makeshift workshop for the day set up. The frustration Catra had from being woken up early started to fade when she saw her fiance at work. Adora had on a pair of unstrapped denim overalls and a white button down shirt that had the top  _ three  _ buttons undone. She was sweaty and had sawdust on her hands and clothes. 

She looked...incredible. 

“Adora,” Catra still had a little bite in her voice. It was really early in the morning. “What are you doing?”

Adora glanced up at her, hair fluttering in a sudden breeze. “Oh, sorry. I just wanted to get started early - I know Scorpia and Perfuma will be by later and Scorpia’s gonna help me raise the barn, but I figured it would be easier if I got all the wood cut and ready so we’re not waiting around all day for that and maybe we could do some work on the well too, figure out why the rope sticks.”

The excitement in Adora’s voice was hard to stay mad at. But Catra was very good at staying mad. “And the hammering?” 

“Oh! I was working and I noticed some of the boards on the deck were a little loose so I was patching those up. We have so many nails I figured we could spare a few, you know?”

“We?” 

“Yeah, these...these are our nails. Our home, I assumed you’d be okay with it.”

She was smiling so brightly, so happy and proud of herself Catra wasn’t mad at her anymore for waking her up. 

That didn’t mean Catra wasn’t going to tease her a little. “You do know that hammering is loud, don’t you?”

Adora frowned. “I do, but it was outside and so I figured you wouldn’t be able to hear it! Did I wake you up?” Catra nodded, pointing at her ears and Adora’s frown somehow deepened, it was obnoxiously cute. “Crap, Catra I’m so sorry! I didn’t think you’d hear me! Of course you’d hear me you have...I snuck out so quietly and everything. I was really proud of myself! Like a ninja!”

“A what?” 

“A...a ninja. Like from Mermisteries: The Sneaky Snake Charmer!” 

Catra sighed. “You and your Mermisteries.”

“They’re really good!” 

“Uh huh, so do you have anything to say for yourself? Waking me up so early?” 

Adora winced a little but then something in her expression shifted. There was a sparkle in her eyes as she walked around her sawing station and closed the distance between herself and Catra. “I’m sorry, Catra. I was just too excited and I wanted to start working as soon as I could on  _ our _ home.” 

“Stop it, you can’t win this with charm and sweetness.”

Then Adora pouted, one of her greatest weapons. “I was hoping we’d get the work done early so that you and I could have a little date night under the stars.”

“You’re so full of it, you didn’t -” Adora put her hands on Catra’s waist, silencing her. 

“Then maybe we could get started on that family…"

Catra’s eyes went wide, for a half a second she thought Adora was serious, then she saw the triumphant little smirk threatening on Adora’s lips and Catra snorted out a laugh. “You’re such an idiot!” She laughed, shoving Adora away. 

“Too much?”

“Just a bit,” Catra cackled. “We’ve been living here for a week. Let's see how long we can keep some chickens alive first before we start talking about kids!”

Adora smiled. “Okay, that’s fair, but I wasn't kidding about the date night thing.” Adora shrugged. “I mean, it wasn't something I had planned until just after I said it, but it would be fun!”

“It would,” Catra smiled, suddenly feeling very awake and syphoning off her fiance’s energy. “Tell you what, you keep working and I’ll go make us some breakfast. I want to try the pancake thing again.”

“Okay, just...just don’t get it on our ceiling. I can’t do the She-ra thing and reach up to clean it off like I did the last time.” 

Catra waved her off. “That was one time and I didn’t know the batter would be so thick! Besides, our ceiling isn’t stupidly tall like the castle!”

“Oh! Put chocolate chips in them!”

* * *

Catra woke to the sound of her and Adora’s communication pad beeping. 

It was dark outside still, any message this late couldn’t be good. Catra was surprised when Adora didn’t wake up with her, but Adora had been in desperate need of sleep for a while now. She’d been struggling with her new role in the Princess Alliance. 

She was still a part of it, but now when things happened and trouble was out there, Adora was not on the front line. That was hard, but necessary - she trained hard still and put in the work, but with no magic and no She-ra, the best thing Adora could do was help train everyone else. Nobody in the Alliance had a better grasp on strength training and staying in shape (outside of Scorpia). So Adora worked to keep everyone fit. She fought and trained with all of them. Teaching them what she knew about hand to hand and using weapons.

She put in so much work into creating personal training for everyone in the Alliance. There were folders and graphs and charts and so much damn clutter that Catra had bought Adora an entire storage cabinet just to hold all of it. 

Still, it wore on her - she missed the front line and she worried so much about everyone who was fighting in her place. Catra had stressed the first few times that maybe Adora regretted her choice - that she wanted to go into the hidden chamber under the castle and take the sword and She-ra back. 

But Adora told her, with emphasis, that she was done - she just admitted that it was hard to let it go. 

So they mostly stayed behind, with Catra working as a strategist and Adora as a trainer - they helped with every step of preparing for missions but neither one of them traveled anymore. 

Catra picked up the communication pad, slid out of bed and softly padded her way out of the room. She pressed the flashing red button and Bow’s face popped up. 

“Catra! Hey, sorry to call so late.”

She glared at him. “You better by dying.”

“I’m not,” he laughed. 

That did not do well for her frustration. “Somebody better be.”

“We’re not,” he said with a playful roll of his eyes. “Glimmer told me that Adora made her promise we’d call as soon as the mission was over and...well...it’s late, but the pirates have been handled and Salenias is safe again.”

Her anger died a little, she had been worried too. Pirates weren’t the worst thing they’d encountered, but with reports of untracked magic and a few bodies being found in the water, it was a little more stressful than normal. 

“Okay, well good then. So the plan worked?” 

Bow nodded. “Yep, you were right - they cared more about money than anything else. Sea Hawk got himself caught, told some wild story about hidden treasure and led them all right to us.” 

“Greedy bastards are all the same,” Catra always enjoyed the pride that came when one of her plans worked. It was better now that her plans were for the good guys side and not trying to kill her girlfriend or her friends.

“How’s Adora?” Bow asked, Catra watched him sit down on the bed. 

“She’s…” Catra glanced back to their room where Adora was sleeping. “She’s Adora, you know? Stressed and anxious.”

“You handle her okay?”

“Of course, we painted the kitchen to keep her busy.”

“Oh! The pretty purple color?”

“No,” Catra cut him off quickly. “We moved out of the castle specifically to get away from all the obnoxiously bright colors. It’s white, simple and easy.”

Bow sighed. “You two and your plain, boring colors. Oh, Glimmer wanted me to tell you that you’re both invited to the Castle in three days for King Micah’s birthday.” 

“Okay, do we...we don’t have to buy him a present do we?”

“No, I - I’m not sure what you buy for a king.”

“The fact that I’m not actively trying to kill his daughter anymore seems like the gift that keeps on giving.”

Bow chuckled, it was nice that they could joke about these things. Though only Bow and Catra really joked about it often. Adora wasn’t a fan of bringing up the past like that and whenever she tried it with Glimmer they just ended up arguing. 

“She’s good though? Adora. Not feeling the itch?”

“Oh she feels it, but I think she knows it’s only that, an itch. She wants to fight and do all those things, but she knows that would require She-ra and she doesn't want all that responsibility. If she could just fight as Adora then she probably would but…”

“Adora’s body isn’t up for it.”

Catra frowned a little, it was true. Without She-ra, Adora had struggled to heal from the big fall she’d taken when they were on Tyr Nova. It wasn’t anything as bad as the magical fight in Tiptree, but Adora’s back would lock up after long days of training and her stamina had never fully recovered. If Adora was ever going to be in battle again, it would have to be She-ra and that was just not something she was interested in. 

“No, honestly she’s getting enough of a workout in just putting the rest of our house together.”

“It looks great though, you guys are gonna start with the animals soon right? Chickens?”

Catra sighed, she wasn’t entirely sure when this became a full on catch-up conversation in the middle of the night but she just kept on talking. “Yeah, only a few to start though - Adora wants like...five and the cows and a horse. But we’re taking it slow - gotta make sure we can keep two alive then we’ll talk about adding more.” Before Bow could ask another question and prolong Catra’s angst at not being tucked in next to Adora, she heard a soft call of her name from the other room. “Listen, Arrow Boy. I love you, but I’m about to have a very panicked blonde girlfriend hunting me down if I don’t go get back in bed.”

That made Bow laugh, Catra kind of hated how much she enjoyed his laugh and his smile - damn Adora and her stupid friends for making her soft. 

“Okay, go back to bed - we’ll see you guys in a few days. Love you, Catra”

“Yeah yeah, love you and whatever, g’night.”

* * *

Adora woke to something pressing against her cheek. 

She shook away from it, somewhere between awake and asleep, she was desperate to get back to her dream. She couldn’t remember it entirely, but there was an endless plate of sandwiches in it and she wanted to go back. 

Then it happened again, a gentle press that drew her eyes open. She rolled onto her back, Melog now right in front of her with their mane purple and eyes distressed. “Catra,” Adora mumbled. “Your big magical cat needs -” when Adora reached over to nudge her bed partner, there was nobody there. “Catra?” She sat up quickly, her eyes still heavy with sleep. 

Melog spun in a circle on the bed before jumping down, making another noise of distress. That was all Adora needed to know something was wrong. 

She climbed out of bed, the cool air hitting her bare legs as she followed Melog out of the room and down the hall. Melog stopped outside the bathroom door, spinning a few times before sitting down and staring at the door. 

Adora slid up and pressed her ear against it, she couldn’t hear anything, but she knew Catra was in there. 

Carefully, she knocked once. “Catra?” 

That’s when she heard a sniffle. “Dammit Melog, I told you I was fine.” Catra’s voice was muffled through the door, but she didn’t  _ sound _ fine. She sounded like she’d been crying. 

“Can I come in?” Adora asked, her hand already on the door handle. 

Catra sighed, “fine, I’m really okay though…” Adora opened the door and found Catra sitting on the floor, curled up in a small gray blanket.

Adora shut the door behind her. “What’s wrong?” She asked, kneeling down and hearing her knees pop in protest. 

“Nothing, just had a bad dream and needed to clear my head.”

“Oh,” Adora frowned. “You didn’t wake me?” 

“You had a long enough day.”

That wasn’t entirely wrong. Between finally going with Glimmer to put the Sword of Protection away deep in the hidden chamber underneath of Bright Moon and then spending the next four hours on teleconferences with other Kingdoms and explaining to them that She- ra was no longer a viable request to put into the Bright Moon monarchy, it had been a pretty emotionally draining day. 

Not that Adora cared about any of that right now. 

“Doesn’t matter,” Adora moved to sit, her knees no longer able to be in that position. It was one of the unfortunate side effects of the last six or so months and not letting She-ra heal her - Adora’s body had been struggling to recover from all it had been through. She was getting there, but it would take time. 

_ Something you have plenty of now _

That thought made her smile. 

“It was just a dumb nightmare.”

Adora scooted close to Catra, shivering a bit as the chilly night settled in. Catra noticed, because she always did - and opened up her blanket as an invite. 

“Wanna talk about it?”

“No,” Catra bit, but Adora held her a little tighter. “Just...Weaver,” she laughed humorlessly. “Haven’t dreamed about her in awhile. I think I’m just more pissed off than anything that she wormed her way back into my head.” 

Adora sighed, Weaver was still a consistent flash of fear in Adora’s mind. It was funny, through Prime and Tiptree and nearly losing herself entirely to She-ra - it was Weaver that still carried the most pain in Adora’s memory. If only because…

“I hate that I miss her sometimes.” Adora said, not really sure why. 

But strangely enough, Catra nodded. “Yeah,” she closed her eyes. “She was so awful and like...look at what she did to us.” Adora pressed her forehead against Catra’s shoulder. “When we were visiting Thaymore last week and...and those kids got all excited when I climbed the tree and pulled their kite out, you remember?”

“I do,” Adora smiled. “They kept chanting ‘hero kitty’ over and over again. It was so cute.”

“I thought Bow was going to literally burst.” That was such a good memory. “I just remember...after that - I was so happy. I was...proud of myself.” She spoke almost bitterly. “And I remember wondering if she would be proud of me too. If she’d see what I had done...what I had become, and be proud of that. Like her opinion still matters.”

Adora dug into that voice in her head, letting it speak. “She’d be prouder of you than she would be of me, I’m sure.” Catra drew back, confusion in her face. “Come on, I was her chosen one. I was...I had  _ such potential _ .” she tried to mimic Weaver’s voice to lighten the mood - it did make Catra smile. “I gave all of it up to be a farmer,” she shrugged. She was happy with her choice, but the feeling of guilt had never left at letting go of so much - she knew that was because she grew up. “I wake up every day and spend all my time in the shower reminding myself that it’s okay for me to be happy. That I...that I haven’t disappointed everyone.” 

Very suddenly, Catra had her arms around Adora’s waist. “You know you can talk to me about that stuff, right? Or Perfuma or...or that professional lady Spinnerella mentioned.”

The therapist - it had been brought up to Adora and Catra a few times. Catra had passed, if only because she’d found peace in mediation and time with Perfuma. 

But Adora had nothing like that - she didn’t want to be a bother and really she was fine. She told herself she was fine every single day. She...she had to tell herself she was fine otherwise the guilt would wreck her.

“I know, I...maybe I should.”

“I think it would help,” Catra said quickly, which gave Adora an idea on where she stood. “You do that and I can fill up your shower time with...other things.”

Adora snorted. “Like you’d wake up that early!”

But her joke died, Catra shook her head and kissed Adora’s cheek. “I would for you.” 

Adora was so in love.

“We got off track, you’re the one with the nightmare tonight.” Adora said and Catra smiled as their bodies pressed together. “You can always wake me up,” she said softly, laying her head on Catra’s shoulder. “I don’t care how long my day was, I want you to. I want to help.”

“I know,” Catra sounded tired and maybe a little embarrassed. “Apparently Melog will just do it anyway so I might as well save them the trouble.” Adora didn’t say anything, it was easier to let Catra come to her when things like this happened. Still, she wasn’t quite patient enough to do nothing so she reached around under the blanket and found Catra’s hand. “I’m okay, really,” Catra had a smile in her voice. “Just a bad dream, they happen. Perfuma has ingrained it into my brain that bad feelings come but they always pass. Something about impermanence or some shit.”

“That’s a big word,” Adora said, enjoying the sound of Catra’s laugh. 

“Impermanence, nothing ever stays the same. The good and the bad will always come and go. So enjoy the good before it fades and don’t let the bad consume you.”

Adora couldn’t begin to explain how wonderful it was to hear Catra speak with so much peace. Even in the middle of a night like this, when she was plagued with a nightmare and tried to handle it on her own, it was clear that Catra had grown. 

In the early days after Prime, there was a tickling fear in the back of Adora’s mind that Catra would run away when things got tough - and a few times she almost did. Adora could still remember finding Catra in the woods one night, backpack at her side. It was terrifying and heartbreaking, but she never made it very far. 

Eventually, that stopped happening and the whisper in Adora’s mind stopped pestering Adora with the idea that she wasn’t enough to keep Catra there. Not good enough, not comforting enough, not pretty enough, not strong enough. 

They were both broken people even after saving the world, but Catra and Adora had always been survivors - and so was their relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ending this story was one of the harder endings I've ever had to write. The plot of this one really got away from me and honestly Etheria and the She-ra canon are tough because there are so many open areas of interpretation. So I do apologize if this ending wasn't as detailed or as informative as maybe it should have been - if I ever come back to canon I'll do a much better job of exploring and explaining and just...better. Anyway, this fic was a lot of fun to write despite the struggle to finish it. Canon Catradora are, at this point, so soft and caring and connected - they're just really great to work with. 
> 
> Thank you all so much for sticking with me through this. For the kind words and support. If there are unanswered questions you have about the ending, I'm sorry - I can try and answer them in the comments. But mostly I just wanted to give them a happy ending with Adora feeling safe and love and happy as herself. That was kind of the whole purpose of the story. 
> 
> Again, thank you. Your support means so much. Plenty more writing from me to come - I hope you'll be there with me :)

**Author's Note:**

> What'd you think?


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